You know what your Wonkette was doing one year ago, exactly? We were in St. Paul, watching the first of Sarah Palin’s national scandals unfold. So fun! Plus, there was a hurricane, to kill more poor and/or black people (it missed, which is how Obama got elected). And it was a year ago tonight that we unveiled the Sarah Palin Fail-o-Meter. Thank the Alaskan Anger Bear God she didn’t wind up as president. (And don’t forget the shitty little dog with an actual tiny boner for McCain!)

Here’s some funny-in-retrospect advice to Hillary Clinton from Sarah Palin! She was at some conference thing in March 2008, five months away from McCain’s doomed decision to make her his running mate, when Karen Breslau of Newsweek asked her about Hillary getting beat up in the primary battle against Obama. MORE »

One year ago yesterday minus a day, John McCain delivered the speech of the century to a small smattering of embittered retirees haunting an abandoned Bingo hall in Louisiana. Meanwhile, a young upstart Muslin named Hussein “Barack” Obama cast a sorcerer’s spell over a large crowd of innocents in St. Paul and told them that yes, he would be their nominee for Preznet if they insisted. Do you remember, America? Do you remember the terrible death-rictus stretched across John McCain’s crumbling skull as he uttered the immortal words, “That’s nnnnot ch-ch-cha-chaaange you can bb-huh-lieve in”? Let’s celebrate this milestone anniversary and laugh again. MORE »

Mexican-hating hill troll Tom Tancredo vanished from America the day Barack Obama became the black president with two mommies (Hawaii and Kansas). MORE »

There has apparently been a raging mystery over the source of the SERIOUS Barack Obama photo in that HOPE poster we’ve all seen so many times that the only logical reaction, now, is to give the same Soviety red-blue Socialist Realism treatment to, uh, Bill Kristol. But the mystery is now solved! Turns out a Reuters campaign-trail shooter named Jim Young took the picture way back in January 2007. And even though Young was following the Obama campaign for the next two years — constantly seeing and even photographing the HOPE/CHANGE posters that were plastered to every vertical surface — he didn’t recognize his shot! MORE »

WONKETTE COMPLETELY ENDORSES THIS 50 WORST MONSTERS LIST: The Buffalo Beast is known for these crushing obituaries of terrible living Americans, and the 2009 edition is built to please/enrage. The 50th, least offensive spot is reserved for your own pretend boyfriend, Barack Obama. Why? To give the list integrity. Anyway, go read this thing, and click the ads and such. [Buffalo Beast]

Despite the best (?) efforts of PUMA and the Bigfoot Murderer, Congress counted up Nate Silver’s mysterious 538 electoral votes today and guess what? Barack Obama got a whole lot of those votes — 365 over old what’s-his-name’s 173 — and Dick Cheney says that makes Barack Obama the president of the U.S.A., hooray! Why do we feel so creeped out? [YouTube]

Here’s a heartbreaking interview with a prisoner at Gitmo, about how the terrorist Hussein did a fascist thing to these seven weird ladies. COMMENTER CHALLENGE: Are you funny enough to avoid the really obvious, mean/tragic joke here and somehow transcend basic fat jokes? [YouTube via Hart88]

Eh, enough blogging for 2008. We leave you with this important image of demonic archpundit Andrew Sullivan in hobo rags at Subway, blogging about Obama as hatchlings dance the devil’s tango in a parallel dimension, THE END.

How many half-assed Sarah Palin costumes did you see last Halloween? Let’s remember all the dumb crap from 2008, in pictures, including this beautiful office shot by Miz Ginevra. MORE »

YEAR IN REAR VIEW: “Ah, right, the Year In Review column! It’s the proudest tradition in American Journalism, when your Main Stream Media gatekeepers throw together a quick retrospective of whatever happened during the year, before we all take off for a long winter vacation — no Christmas for us, thanks! We’re the media, after all.” [AOL Political Machine]