Tag: 1st amendment

Todd Kincannon Fights For His Right To Be A Dick Without Little Hindrances Like “Professional Standards Of Conduct”

It has been some time since we checked in on the antics of sexxxy dick pic sexxxter Todd Kincannon, longtime Wonkette favorite for his habit of outrageous attention whoring. Recently Todd went totally silent on the Twitter machine, his...

Texas Gun Humpers Now Upset They Can’t Approach Any Old Motorist While Heavily Armed

It has happened to everyone: you’re behind the wheel of your car, idling at a stoplight while absently singing along to your favorite One Direction CD, when you spot a bedraggled, crazy-eyed homeless man making his way from vehicle...

Hero Judge Tells Bigoted Louisiana Teacher To STFU And GTFO

Remember that mean teacher in Louisiana who told one of her kids he was "stupid" for being a Buddhist? And remember how his parents sued and the ACLU was all, "Hey, mean lady, you can't go around saying stuff...

Tom Delay Reminds America That God Wrote The Constitution And George Washington Rose From The Dead

Looks like now that ol' Tom DeLay's legal troubles are in the past, he's busy polishing up his credentials for the next phase of his life on the Wingnut Welfare circuit. In addition to his glee at getting his...

Hero Teen Adds Lord’s Prayer To His Graduation Speech, Saves America

Well, thank heavens, we finally have some balance in this crazy old world! After all these stories about transgender prom queens and adorable sodomite "cutest couples," our long national nightmare of progressive nice-time is finally over. In protest of a...

Joseph Farah Determines ‘We’ Had More Freedom in 1776 Than Today (For Certain Values Of ‘We’)

Joseph Farah, the editor of Serious News Outlet WorldNet Daily, has a Serious Question he wishes you to consider: “Are we better off now than we were in 1776?” And while the real answer involves glancing at the...

Here’s A Surprise: School Vouchers Help Spread Creationism

Just in case anyone was worried that American schools were sinking into a morass of Creationism and Stupid (ah, but we repeat ourselves), the bad news is, well, they kind of are. But the good news is that there...

Hero Teen Opposes Government School’s New ID Card Because It Is The Mark Of The Beast

Would you like a story about schools that isn't horribly depressing, but only mildly eye-rolling? As it happens, we have one for you! A number of Texas school districts (yes, Texas again!) have figured out that since federal...