Search Results for “David Weigel/bydate”

  Fiorina: Can I Still Sue Over Demon Sheep?

Better Watch Your Mouth, Donald Trump Suing Everyone Who’s Mean To Him

Field notes: Subject 'Trumpy' issues 'pant-hoot' challenge immediately prior to flinging feces
...tionist! If anyone’s in the shakedown business, it might be this letter, which warns Club for Growth head David McIntosh: In the interest of avoiding what will certainly be a costly litigation process, we are prepared to offer you the one-time opportunity to rectify this matter by providing us with your prompt written assurances that (i) you have stopped running the Attack Ads; and (ii) you will not generate or disseminate any misleading or...
  How's he be-traying-us today?

Adulterous Traitor Gen. David Petraeus Sorry For Sticking His State Secrets In His Girlfriend’s Lady Hole

Totally worth it
...t we’d heard the last of our own laughter at the disgraced former director of the CIA, all-the-stars Gen. David Petraeus, after he agreed to plead guilty in March of this year, in exchange for a little slap-and-tickle on the wrist. KINKY. What was it he was guilty of? Oh, that’s right, side-banging his subordinate “biographer” girlfriend Paula Broadwell (not her porn name) and murmuring the secret launch codes into her ear...
  The Last Trumptation Of Christ

Donald Trump Finally Googles Bible Verses For Billionaires

The Yoogest Story Ever Told
..., he’s given it a lot of thought, and so, in an interview with the Christian Broadcasting Network’s David Brody, Trump explained that a section from the book of Proverbs has always been deeply meaningful to him: Proverbs, the chapter “never bend to envy.” I’ve had that thing all of my life where people are bending to envy.” This is almost too perfectly Trump: Turns out there’s a part of the Bible that tells oth...
  Don't the people have a right to know?

Family Values Sen. David Vitter Does Not Want To Talk About That Time He Banged Hookers, OK?

Whatcha workin' on there, Dave?
Obligatory Vitter-in-diapers picture Louisiana Sen. David Vitter is known for many things: being a dick to poors; being a dick to gays; being a dick to women; being a dick to first-generation Americans; being a dick to every single one of President Obama’s nominees; being a dick about Obamaphones, which is not really a thing; being a dick about President Obama’s birth certificate, which is really a thing; and even being a dick to Se...
  The roundup to end all roundups

Which Republican Candidate Can Lick That Kentucky Clerk Lady’s Knob Best?

LINE UP, BOYS!, who are too good to answer questions about the human blumpkin Kim Davis, we guess. At press time, Scott Walker was half asleep with his tongue hanging out of his mouth. Deer Wonket, can I rite 4 u? [Talking Points Memo / Washington Blade /Dave Weigel on Twitter / CBS News / WTOC / The New Civil Rights Movement / New York Times / Ted Cruz on Facebook]...
  No one knows who they were or whether they recycled

John Kasich Likes Planet Earth OK, Not Ready For Serious Commitment

Let's not get too carried away with this 'save the planet' nonsense
...wilds of New Hampshire, John Kasich (R-And Who Are You Again?) is doing a campaign event, and WaPo’s Dave Weigel is tweeting up a storm. Of particular interest is this Deep Thought on the environment: Glad he clarified that! It seems pretty consistent with his previous firm position on global warming: It’s real, but nobody knows whether it’s caused by humans, because if that were the case, we might have to do something about it....
  see ya wouldn’t wanna be ya

I Came, I Saw, I Got The F*ck Out: Your (Final) Florida Roundup

Dumber than a speeding bullet
...dn’t have happened had the cops not bogarted his weed. What Do Florida Cops Do When They’re Not Stealing Drugs? David Borst was, until last year, deputy police chief in Fruitland Park, until the feds outed him as a KKK member, which is NO FAIR, freedom of speech, etc. So what did Mr. Borst do with his unemployed self? David Borst resigned as the Fruitland Park deputy police chief last July after being identified by the FBI as being a member of on...
  Menstrual Blood Libel!

Donald Trump: Why Was Megyn Kelly Moderating A Debate Instead Of In The Blood Hut?

Hey, it makes as much sense as the original
...the pack as legitimate,” this was just one step too far. And that’s coming from the guy who called David Souter a “goat-fucking child molester.”  But HE apologized, and Trump never did. And so the question must be asked: Is our Supreme Court Justice insulters learning? Trump certainly doesn’t think he has to apologize for an innocent, incomplete thought about Megyn Kelly’s bleeding nose. Saturday morning, the Trump campai...
  Look! Rhetoric!

Wingnuts Invent Fun New Way To Slur Each Other, Hooray!

There might be some racist implications to this term. But only pussies care about racism example from our internets image searching: White nationalist Richard Spencer explained to WaPo’s Dave Weigel that the term perfectly describes most of the mainstream GOP: It is the cuckold who, whether knowingly or unknowingly, loses control of his future. This is an apt psychological portrait of white ‘conservatives,’ whose only identity is comprised of vague, abstract ‘values,’ and who are participating in the...
  this picture is everything

Rick Scott Is Just Like Mother Teresa: Your Florida Roundup

Adventures in Sucking Up: The Florida Edition feed his cat. When her son walked in and saw his mother, he began yelling, the report states. At one point, David Corning said to his mother, “Go back inside you (expletive deleted) or I will kill you,” the report states. He then grabbed a broom and swung it at his mother, hitting her on the side of the head and breaking her glasses, deputies reported. His defense, it turns out, is that the old bag is nuts. David Corning told depu...
  He seemed nice

Lafayette Shooter Was Teabaggin’, Gay-Hatin’, Hitler-Lovin’ Fool, THANKS OBAMA!

Just another member of the Lone Wolf Freedom Shooty Brigade Of Lone Wolves
...ey it.” What a freethinker he was! He also believed that welfare recipients should be sterilized and that David Duke was so much better than Martin Luther King, Jr. He loved David Duke so much, according to the SPLC, that “he registered to attend David Duke’s EURO Conference in New Orleans, according to a spreadsheet of conference registrations obtained by Hatewatch.” This is starting to sound like the Family Research Council...
  Even diaper-fetishists have to eat

Whore-Sexing Sen. David Vitter Wiped Away Gay Marriage Tears With Greasy Chick-Fil-A Meat

He's crying because he's hungry.
Friday was a tough day for Louisiana Sen. David Vitter. First, he had to shed his pull-ups and dismount from whatever whore lady was currently being Not His Wife and helping him fulfill his diaper sex fantasies (ALLEGEDLY ALLEGEDLY ALLEGEDLY!), and then he turned on the Google and found out that the Supreme Court had crammed his throat with gay marriage, and he did not like that! The taste of diapers on his tongue did not go well with the taste...
  the commentczar's in town

Deleted Comments: Leave The Duggars Alooooooone

I must object! Josh isn't even IN this one! You morans can't even tell your Duggars apart!
...these resisters go unpunished, hence the efforts to discredit the Duggars, Phil Robertson, Hobby Lobby founder David Green and similar people who clearly have their lives better organized and managed than the majority of Americans. I have to wonder how much of the disdain shown towards the Duggars derives from envy of their greater vitality. The future, demographically speaking, belongs to the people who show up for it. Well, guess what? The fut...
  sluts sluts sluts

Oh Hey There’s A Shark In The Middle Of The Road, Guess The State: Your Florida Roundup

Actually set in Florida, true story
...rlayed that rousing defeat into the top job at the DA’s office, which brings us to the courtroom this week, and David Damus, who may or may not be a murderer, we don’t know. Either way, he has an admirably quick wit: The murder trial of David Damus lost its quiet courtroom decorum Wednesday when the accused killer took the stand in his own defense and had a heated exchange with Orange-Osceola State Attorney Jeff Ashton. “When you lost the C...
  Et tu Nancy?

Democrats Betray Obama On Trade Deal, Guess He’s Done Being President Now

Hmm, yeah, still not funny
...d Republicans were the ones saying #StandWithObama and if you don’t, you’re basically a Nazi: [Rep. David Schweikert] said the things unions were putting out to counter the free-trade push were “crazy.” Then he likened their work to an infamous Nazi. “Goebbels would be very proud of them,” said Schweikert[.] That would be Arizona Republican David Schweikert, he is pretty much nuts, as you know. He does not trus...
  redemption stories

Huckabee: That Duggar Boy Made A Mistake, Just Like When My Son Murdered That Dog

You STAY in her lap, where you're safe.
...he just murdered a puppy dog, that’s all. As yr Wonkette reported all the way back in 2007: Word is that David [Huckabee] and his best buddy hanged a stray dog while they were counselors at a Boy Scout camp, but no charges were ever filed and David eventually became an Eagle Scout despite being fired from his “job” as a Boy Scout camp counselor for torturing a fucking stray dog. While neither confirming nor denying the incident, Huck told...