At last, the only endorsement that matters: George W. Bush supports… Obama, again?… no, the other one, Willard McScalp-o-tron. It must have been the tales of privileged schoolboy terorrizing that ultimately won over Bush’s heart. Gotta make’m earn it, the Bushes like to say. Anyway, Romney better get started moving into the White House right [...]
You know what the difference is between America’s elite, the 1 percenters and the fast-rising politicians, and slobs like you? Planning. Like, you, for instance, have no plans for the day, and are trying to relieve the ennui by reading a blog about dick jokes and politics, and maybe later you’ll try masturbating or something, [...]
How has Barack Nobama Disgraced The Office Of The Presidency today? Did he a) put his feet up on his desk; b) fly in his plane; c) campaign; d) take his shirt off at the beach; or e) do a swear? HE DID A SWEAR!
Sure, Obama pushed a little girl in elementary school, and reflected on it and felt bad about it from that day forward; and Romney was such an entitled jerk, always picking on loners and other weak kids that could be culled from the herd, that all his old chums, when contacted by his campaign to [...]
Mitt Romney has a thing (one) he has stood firm on, and that is that he is against gay marriage. Sure, there was a time as governor of Massachusetts when he managed to be on both sides of the issue simultaneously, both directing his administration to comply with state judges’ “Goodridge” ruling allowing gays to [...]
Sad Mitt Romney is so jealous of all the thank-you notes and the hot piles of gay dollar bills that President Popular has gotten ever since he belatedly admitted that he thinks gay people should be able to get married. Sad Mitt Romney is not as tragically lame as he appears to be on this [...]
Hi and welcome back to America’s 2012 race for student body president: Today we heard that we should not vote for school yacht club treasurer Mitt Romney, because he enjoys giving unsolicited haircuts to his fellow male students against their will, what a jerk. But please consider on the other hand for a moment whether [...]
Oh good, Alaska’s at-risk youth have an opinion about Barack Obama’s new/old stance in favor of same-sex marriage! He revealed this to America with a bland anecdote about how his daughters would never think to treat the gay parents of their classmates differently than other parents, remember? Let’s go to spokesmom Bristol Palin for the [...]
Seems ol’ Diddles McGee at the Greene County, Virginia, GOP, has caught some unfriendly fire after his insane ramblings about how we must have “armed revolution” if Obama succeeds at the ballot box. He tried to pull a Wyclef — “When I say gun, I mean my pen and paper” — and claim it was [...]
Congratulations, Gays! President Barack Obama has finally come out of the closet, REPORTEDLY, about his belief that gay people should have the same marriage rights as Kim Kardashian and that goofball, whatshisfuck. Of course, liberals have always believed that he always believed this, mostly because he said so, back in 1996, when he was not [...]
Rend your clothes, tear your hair, and weep weep for Doughy Pantload, as Liberal Fascists have ripped his two Pulitzer Prize nominations from his cold dead hands. Wait, Jonah Goldberg was nominated twice for the Pulitzer Prize? No, and the Pulitzer people are really, really tired of people claiming they were “nominated” when they sent [...]
Well, here is some fine post-Election Day news for you! Seems another Democrat besides President I Guess It Rains Down In Africa was on the primary ballot in West Virginny, and, with 83 percent of precincts reporting, 40 percent of the Democrats there voted for him! So who is Keith Judd? Well, he is currently [...]
Hey Greene County, Virginia, GOP! We bet you are down-home fellas what love your wives and neighbors and hardly ever beat your dogs. Do you perhaps have some words of wisdom for the rest of us? Maybe here in this March newsletter article “Rallying Against the Living Wage,” or this one, “Is Barack Hussein Obama [...]
Hello, it is called “freedom to assemble” and “freedom of association” and “freedom of speech” and “freedom to try to manufacture ricin” and it is IN THE CONSTITUTION, SHEEPLE. Why is the government illegally arresting all these various white supremacists just because they are trying to start a race war? Because Barack Obama wants your [...]
Well, that seals it. Barack Obama’s body count is now almost as high as the murderous Clinton Crime Family’s! Whom is he capping? (That is gang talk, because Barack Obama is a Chicago thug.) Anybody and everybody who might have led to the Ghost of Breitbart releasing something way awesomer about Bill Ayers than the [...]
