Scotty May Leave, but His Talking Points Will Live On

Scott’s last briefing? A lot like the rest of them, but everyone was being a little bit nicer. His first answer was an almost poetic blend of nearly every talking point he’s been given over the last two years and cherry-picked economic statistics. Anyone have a rush transcript? We can’t even remember the question, but his lengthy response made us fall in love all over again. Then: BREAKING NEWS: PERSONNEL CHANGE! …to be announced later.

He was beset by Russian cell phone ring tones and weird foreign press questions — if we were Press Secretary, we would only call on the foreign press. Funny accents and non-sequiters! “Did you even notice that outside world does not criticize you as much as your maybe deserve?” Well, Russian guy, that’s a very interesting question.

My successor will do a great job, blah blah blah, wish him the best, looking forward to working with you, etc. Oh, Scott. When people kept bringing up polls, he seemed to suggest that their response will be to stage more photo-ops. “Our greatest asset is the President.” We think he’s repeating that fucking Note memo from yesterday — it was leaked from Scott, not from Snow!

“Best of luck on the lecture circuit.”

“I will miss all of you as well — individually, at least.”

“It’s your last two-part for me.”

Then, suddenly, some sparks! And it’s about PAT KENNEDY! YES! Best question of the day. Was that Bill Sammon? He was positively DRIPPING WITH DISDAIN. “YOU’RE HIS SPOKESMAN” — uh, no, Bill, that’s not actually true. But we are as SHOCKED and APPALLED as you are!

More foreign press: “Greatest Press Secretary ever,” they declare! Yay! Scotty and the Foreign Press are BFF! Have a kick-ass summer, Scott!

A few more boring minutes, then Scotty has his thank yous. He thanked the Situation Room, but we don’t think he meant Wolf. He thanked the entire Press Office by name — we think an orchestra arrived half-way through to make the music swell. And now on to the big Firing Someone Announcement. It’s been fun.

READ MORE: patrick kennedy, scott mcclellan, shake-ups, white house press briefings

Daily Briefing: ‘Theater of the Absurd’

• Administration and Sen. Frist (R-Tenn.) agree on 45-day review of Dubai port deal. Scott McClellan: “We believe, however, the additional time and investigation at the request of the company will provide Congress with a better understanding of the facts, and that Congress will be comfortable with the transaction moving forward once it does.” [WP, NYT, NYT, W$J, USAT]
• States make decisions on the “morning-after” pill as the FDA wavers. [WP]
• Army will reimburse Halliburton subsidiary for nearly $2.4b despite findings of overcharges. [NYT]
• Bush sets off on whirlwind two-day tour of India. [NYT]
• Mike McCurry on the White House press briefings: “It has turned into a theater of the absurd.” Ari Fleischer: “The public perceives the press not as watchdogs but as attack dogs.” [NYT]

READ MORE: 2006, 2008, White House, ari fleischer, army, bill frist, dubai, fda, george w. bush, halliburton, hillary clinton, homeland security, india, john mccain, mike mccurry, morning after pill, national guard, port deal, red cross, rnc, scott mccellan, white house press briefings

Bound and Gaggled: Playing One Against the Other

You know, there’s no shame using the tactics of a five-year-old when you sit in Scott McClellan’s kindergarten:

Q Did anyone at that meeting look at the President and say, you’ve made some mistakes, and mention any of them?

MR. McCLELLAN: Oh, I think they expressed some of their views on things that they think maybe we could do — some of them did — that we could do differently, or things that we could build upon.

Q What kind of things?

MR. McCLELLAN: I said — I indicated earlier that I’ll let them speak for themselves. They’re very capable individuals.

Q They told us to ask you.

MR. McCLELLAN: Actually, I think they spoke to the press out there; I don’t think that’s what they said. Nice try.

Q That’s where they told us to ask you.

MR. McCLELLAN: Nice try. (Laughter.)

But, Moooommmm! Lawrence Eagleburger said it was okay for us to have ice creams before dinner! Can we please? Can we can we?— DCEIVER

READ MORE: scott mcclellan, top, white house press briefings

Daily Briefing: Scott McClellan Upgrades

• Democrats seen to have a better chance to gain governorships than Congress. Gov. Mitt Romney (R-Mass.): “The math is not in our favor this cycle.” Gov. Bill Richardson (D-N.M.): “If we’re going to win in ‘08, strengthening the Democratic party shouldn’t be through Washington, but through the states.” [WSJ]
• GAO finds government credit cards were misused and overcharged in the wake of Katrina. [WP]
• White House press briefings will be held across the street for at least seven months while the briefing room is renovated. [WP]
• Both parties are increasingly running minority candidates. [USAT]
• Adam Kidan takes responsibility for dealings with Jack Abramoff; says he was not duped: “I wish I had never met Jack.” [LAT]
• Social Security, Medicare and Medicaid made up nearly half of the total 2004 budget. [USAT]
• South Dakota tests the boundaries of abortion restrictions. [WP]
• Rep. Tom Tancredo (R-Colo.) likes ruffling GOP feathers over immigration: “Party I couldn’t care less about. If it gets hurt by this, it deserves to be hurt.” [LAT]
• Military contractors are grinding for a “flattening of the defense budget.” [NYT]
• Administration supports Anna Nicole Smith in Supreme Court case. [WT]

READ MORE: 2006, 2008, Democrats, Pentagon, Republicans, SCOTUS, White House, abortion, adam kidan, anna nicole smith, bill richardson, gao, immigration, jack abramoff, katrina, medicaid, medicare, mitt romney, scott mcclellan, social security, south dakota, tom tancredo, white house press briefings