Castro doesn’t seem to be dead.

OAS does seem to be just as credulous as a bunch of **** ing bloggers.

Earlier: So, Is Castro Dead, or What?

Anyone who works at the State Deparment want to confirm the anonymous rumor we just heard that everyone’s freaking the **** out re. the unverified death of Fidel Castro?

To be more specific — we hear OAS heard rumors of said death and is, as of right now, unable to verify Castro’s whereabouts or hold on this mortal coil.

Update: Jonah Goldberg seems to think so, which makes us doubt it somehow.

(The rumor seems to have started on Wall Street, and the State Department’s taking it seriously.)

• Under no circumstances, in this world or another, has Joe Biden ever been, “brown and down.” [Love and Haterade]
• A glass of water, the right size buns, and a little time for digestion would be all it takes to “liquidate” the North Korean nuclear program. [SFGate]
• Vladimir Putin touches young boys, “like a kitten,” but the question remains: hot or not? [Things That Make You Go “Hmm”]
• He may touch children with the soft pad of his paw, but the economies of the European Union will feel the full power of his one-dimensional petrochemical based economic leverage, er, claw. [Andrew Sullivan] Accusations of plagiarism faced by Ann Coulter may go unsubstantiated as man hired to find proof is afraid to, “make my eyes bleed.” [Galley Cat]
  
• The sandy beaches are calling you Justice Stevens - heed them, please. [Southern Appeal]
• Easy-E rolls over in his grave as gangs resort to blogging their threats: “Your page views ain’t **** bitch, you gettin’ blasted.” [Wired]

Everybody loves Condi, and everybody wants new Condiproduct delivered daily, so what’s a newspaper to do when she’s gone (or boring) for a few days and no fresh photo-ops or breaking vague quotes are available? Well, if you’re Glenn Kessler at the Washington Post, you simply cut up all the past profiles, throw them up in the air and paste them where they land to create the stunningly pointless new puff-piece which ran yesterday. Yes, yes, she controls her image with unprecedented tightness, she gets greeted by celebrities at foreign airports, she’s a bit of a clothes-horse, people want her to run for President, she’s the anti-Hillary… WE GET IT! Please, Madame Secretary, Doctor Ferragamo, we’re begging you: tease out your hair, slap on some hot-pants, dance on a tabletop and give ‘em something new to write about. Is it any wonder some people forego the ennui and simply make **** up?

Defining Her Own Sphere of Influence [Washington Post]

• Don’t fret, we wouldn’t let an idle summer week pass without a shallow poll. Thus, we proudly present: The Hill Intern Hotties competition. Since everyone already knows how this works, we’ll just let you speed along - boys’ poll here and girls’ poll here. In case you’re one of those “readers,” we’ve also got written testimonials for all the pretty girls and all the strong men.
  
• In non-hottie-related news, it’s getting really hot in Florida, and the reporters’ and editors’ brains are starting to resemble an anti-drug commercial.

• Even Supreme Court Justices like to wear their gang colors out to parties.

• The really scary (but probably untrue) Bush-Condi boot-knocking rumors persist.

• Presidential nephew Pierce Bush has a face that exudes the “another round of domestic bottles for me and my homeless tranny friend” lifestyle.

• Congressional daughter Briana Bilbray has the same taste in swill as Pierce.

• Our take on the U.S.’s World Cup finish.

• Congressional Democrats shake their skinny fists at the lack of a withdrawal schedule for Iraq. We yawn.

• Transportation Secretary Norm Mineta resigns. We yawn some more.

As we’ve previously stated, we don’t put much stock in the rumors of an affair between President Bush and Condoleezza Rice — an affair that supposedly led a furious Laura Bush to decamp from the White House for the Mayflower Hotel. We have our doubts, largely because of the Condi part. C’mon, guys — Condi???

Right now, the Bushes are traveling in Europe. George and Laura Bush have made several public appearances together, and nothing seems amiss. In a question-and-answer session in Vienna, Laura revealed that George brings her coffee in bed each morning. This doesn’t seem like the behavior of a cheater.

Nevertheless, the Dubya-Condi rumors persist — and now they’ve been picked up by the tabloids. After the jump, for those of you who don’t share our skepticism, we recount — but don’t vouch for — the latest Bush-Condi gossip.

On June 15, the Wayne Madsen Report made these claims:

Although the major media and the White House spinmeisters have worked overtime to squash the story of marital problems between George W. Bush and Laura Bush over the reported affair between the President and his Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice, WMR is continuing to pursue it. We recently learned from a noted Washington socialite that Laura Bush has been seeing an old romantic flame, described as a wealthy businessman from Texas. Mrs. Bush is said to have been comforted by the male friend over the years as she weathered her husband’s various extramarital trysts.

Conducting an affair in the fishbowl that is the White House would seem to be nearly impossible. Both the President and First Lady have packed schedules and are seldom alone. There’s a reason why the Clinton-Lewinsky affair involved little more than brief and furtive trysts, on the White House premises, featuring nothing more hard core than fellatio. (Hence President Clinton’s claim that he did not have “sexual relations” with “that woman.”) So Laura spending lots of quality time with an “old romantic flame,” or coming and going at the Mayflower Hotel, would probably raise an eyebrow or two.

Nevertheless, the irresistibly salacious story was picked up by the supermarket tabloids. Again from the Wayne Madsen Report, June 19:

American Media, which owns the tabloids National Enquirer, The Star, and The Globe, and which scooped the mainstream media on Gary Hart’s affair with Donna Rice on “Monkey Business II”; Bill Clinton’s affair with Gennifer Flowers and salacious details about his relationship with Monica Lewinsky; and Jesse Jackson’s illegitimate child has published details of the George W. Bush-Condoleezza Rice relationship and his problems with First Lady Laura Bush in the current, June 26, 2006 issue of The Globe. WMR is quoted in the story.

Obviously we have our doubts about the reliability of the tabloids. We recall how they took our post throwing cold water on the possibility of Chelsea Clinton using cocaine and turned it into an article implying she has a drug problem.

But hey, the rumors are out there. And if there’s anything we learned from the Clinton-Lewinsky affair, it’s that truth can be stranger than fiction. Despite our big-time skepticism with respect to the Bush-Condi rumors, we’ll never say never when presented with a seemingly outlandish tale of presidential misbehavior.

Wayne Madsen Report (no permalinks; scroll down to June 19 and June 15 entries)

Earlier: Crazy Talk We Can’t Ignore: The Bush-Condi Rumors

• In defiance of the best interests of both the Democratic party and summer weekend motorists, Jack Murtha chooses Friday afternoon to declare his intention to run for majority leader, with the notion that Democrats will actually win some midterm elections and retake the House. “Jacky Drama” and “First Degree Murtha” expected to be to most popular nicknames.

• No tears, but at least one full sigh as we watched DeLay’s farewell speech. We hope someone got some free drinks at his party, and will send us pictures — of the party, not the drinks.

• All your yellow ribbon magnets and support for the troops have paid off! Abu Musab al-Zarqawi was killed in Iraq. Death can sometimes be a beginning, as in this case when it started a civic morality discussion on how to display bloody portraits, and how not to. The President, as usual, was out in front with the ideas.

• His prosperity threatened, Arlen Specter walks calmly to his desk, retrieves his weapons, and fires a shot at Dick Cheney — with an angry letter and, um, a craigslist posting.

• First, find out what Kiplinger’s is. Second, get paid out the frame like Tom Delay and Dick Cheney. Third, use fresh lucre to rapidly consume goods and services, increasing overall life satisfaction.

• Bush got back to the gay marriage thing, but unlike other Bush initiatives, this one was over quickly.

• More than one blogger’s wet dream was realized by a New York Times article on Katherine Harris.

• Cynthia McKinney is at it again, setting a bad example any way she can.

• The rumor about Bush and Condi burned so hot, it consumed itself in seconds.

Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice, assuming the position. (AP Photo/Gerald Herbert, via Princess Sparkle Pony)

We’ve been trying to take the high road around here. Over the past few days, we’ve refrained from writing about rumors of an alleged affair between Dubya and Condi, which supposedly caused Laura Bush to move out of the White House. We’ll willing to believe almost anything around here — but this gossip strikes us as a tad ridiculous.

As in the case of the Martin Random rumors, however, a flood of reader emails has forced our hand. We will now blog about the aforementioned crazy talk, just to stem the tide of tips about it.

Check out the dirt, after the jump.

The rumors appear to have originated with a June 1 posting at the Wayne Madsen Report:

Rocky shoals for Bush marriage? Informed sources Inside the Beltway report that First Lady Laura Bush has established temporary residence in the Mayflower Hotel in Washington, DC as a result of a tiff with President Bush over an extramarital relationship involving her husband. Mr. Bush’s tryst is said to involve Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice. It is not known how long Mrs. Bush plans to remain at the Mayflower, however, her security detail has been present at the hotel during hours when the First Lady would normally be residing in the White House.

While she was National Security Adviser, Rice, who has never been married, referred to George W. Bush as “my husband” before she corrected herself and said, “President. Bush” Rice was speaking at a dinner hosted by New York Times bureau chief Philip Taubman when she made her “husband” remarks.

Now, we’re more than willing to believe parts of this rumor. Laura moving to a hotel? Sure! Perhaps they got into a big fight, maybe over W. drinking again?

The Condi bit, however, just reeks of the made-up. Are we talking about the same Condoleezza Rice — the perpetually polished, prim, and proper Secretary of State? The rumor borders on the laughable. In fact, when we (sheepishly) floated this rumor to one State Department official who has worked closely with Rice, laughter was the result.

Aside from being out of character for the uber-professional, super-dutiful Secretary Rice, we doubt that an affair with Bush would float her boat. Pravda seems to think Condi’s a lesbian; we lean towards a finding of asexuality. Either way, the notion of her having an affair with the boss, who also happens to be the leader of the free world, strikes us as highly dubious.

Of course, none of this has stopped the rumor from sprouting legs and running. On June 2, the Wayne Madsen Report expanded on its earlier coverage:

[T]wo mainstream media sources have confirmed that their sources also have reported an ongoing affair between Mr. Bush and Rice.

The mainstream media is hamstrung in reporting stories about Bush’s personal life. For example, in 2001, the media highlighted Bush’s comments about his passing out from choking on a pretzel while watching a football game in the White House. In reality, Bush, who claims he gave up drinking years ago, passed out from being inebriated. Washington’s movers and shakers knew the story about Bush’s drinking but the media studiously avoided it.

And then, on June 3, this report:

WMR can report that a Mayflower Hotel staffer has confirmed that First Lady Laura Bush spent at least one night this past week at the hotel, which is four blocks north of the White House. Mrs. Bush reportedly moved out of the White House after a confrontation with President Bush over his on-going affair with Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice. The Mayflower’s official position on the story is that they can “neither confirm nor deny” the identities of their guests. Because it’s penchant for security and secrecy is well known to the Secret Service, the Mayflower has become a reliable hotel for U.S. and international VIPs.

Some Washington observers believe that the recent flare up between Laura Bush and the president stems from the fact that her poll numbers are twice as favorable as her husband’s (60 percent to 29 percent). Laura Bush’s recent solo missions to New Orleans, Colorado, and an AIDS conference at the United Nations represent a virtual declaration of independence from the most unpopular president in U.S. history.

As we’ve said before, we have no problem with the rumor of Laura temporarily decamping from the White House. But the Condi thing seems a trifle nutty. And the notion of Laura wanting to distance herself from her increasingly unpopular husband, like a congressional candidate in a tough reelection battle, seems similarly unlikely.

And now the rumors get really weird. Leola McConnell, a former professional dominatrix now running for governor in Nevada — a race that has also attracted an ex-porn star — alleges as follows:

“President Bush’s speech to the nation Monday. If he doesn’t say he’s a gay American or at the least a bisexual one then he shouldn’t be making one at all. And the notion that it would be in regards to writing bigotry into our nation’s Constitution is reprehensible. Too bad it isn’t me doing the rebuttal because in 1984, I watched him perform (with the enthusiasm of homosexual male who had done this many times before) a homosexual act on another man, namely Victor Ashe. Victor Ashe is the current Ambassador to the nation of Poland who should also come out like former Governor McGreevey of New Jersey and admit to being a gay American. Other homo-erotic acts were also performed by then private citizen George Bush because I performed one of them on him personally.

I am the woman this website (bushssecretlifein84.tripod.com) speaks of that has been posted on the net nearly two years now. None of this would be the business of anyone but President Bush’s little ruse to save his failed presidency by using DOMA [Defense of Marriage Act] to divide Americans one from the other has to be exposed as the act of a desperate closeted homosexual man. The only crime in being GLBT is in the hiding. The President needs to come clean with the American people about his own past sexual behavior before he tries to besmirch the humanity of people in search of sincerely committing to the same bonds of matrimony he’s afforded. He violated his own vows of monogamy having a homosexual affair with a long time family friend of whom his wife had no knowledge. His hypocrisy seems to know no bounds.

Any truth to this? Who knows. In any event, it took place back in 1984 — over 20 years ago. And we all know that when Bush was young and irresponsible, he was young and irresponsible.

We’ll continue to follow this story, and perhaps we’ll bring you some updates. But it strikes us as a bit too good to be true. Until we see some hard evidence, a la the infamous blue dress, put us in the camp of doubters.

Don’t get us wrong; we would love for all this stuff to be accurate. We fear, however, that proof of a Bush-Condi affair — or gay sex involving the president, for that matter — may turn out to be as elusive as those WMDs.

Wayne Madsen Report
WOW [BlogActive]
Condicise! Back By Popular Demand! [Princess Sparkle Pony]

Perhaps in response to the compelling results of a recent Wonkette poll, House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) said this to the New York Times:

“I hear them say on TV that I’ve had face-lifts,” said Ms. Pelosi, 66, who added that she had never had one. “I heard one woman say I’ve had a face-lift, but it looks terrible.”

She shook her head and said, “Did you ever think that those two things cancel themselves out?”

Also, note her careful wording: no facelifts. But we asked about an eyelid lift.

Additional commentary, including a post-surgery sighting of Pelosi, after the jump.

Also in the same article, Pelosi’s fellow Congressional Catfight combatant — Rep. Barney Frank (D-MA) — whips out the claws: “Her public speaking style is not good.”

Ouch. With Democrats like these, who needs Republicans?

The Times seems to agree with Frank’s assessment:

Ms. Pelosi can struggle at times to give the air of the gravitas that powerful women like Hillary Rodham Clinton and Condoleezza Rice do, both friends and adversaries say. She can appear tentative and overscripted in interviews, with a tight smile and large, expressive eyes than can leave an impression of nervousness.

A “tight” smile, and “large” eyes? Does Mark Leibovich share our doubts about Pelosi’s denial of plastic surgery?

If so, who can blame him? A San Francisco-based reader offers this Bay Area sighting of Pelosi:

I live about eight blocks from Nancy Pelosi in SF and a bit over a year ago, I was buying a sandwich at the corner market… I saw a large government SUV outside, and I saw this vaguely familiar person who looked like a cross between the Joker and my Congresswoman, followed closely by an assistant. I quickly realized that Nancy had recently had a rather severe face lift.

So if she did more recently have her eyes done, I’d be surprised. Because you could have gently set a quarter on that face and it still would have bounced ten feet up in the air.

Finally, we enjoyed this little bit of color in Leibovich’s piece:

Ms. Pelosi said she slept little, stole exercise by dashing through airports and subsisted many days on Ghirardelli chocolates (“less than 10” a day) and pistachio nuts (which she shells with her teeth).

“I had a hamburger last night and it was my breakfast, lunch and dinner,” she said last week. “And I had these strange things. I realized they were French fries.” She made quick spiraling gestures with her fingers to show what they looked like.

It was apparent that she was not familiar with curly fries.

Not familiar with the curly version of freedom fries? How un-American!

The Republicans don’t need to demonize Pelosi. She’s doing a fine job of that all by herself, thank you very much.

Talk of Pelosi as Speaker Delights Both Parties [NYT]

Earlier: Extreme Makeover: Nancy Pelosi?
Extreme Makeover, Nancy Pelosi: Poll Results

Earlier today, we presented you with two photos of House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi, then asked you whether maybe she “had a little work done” (to wit, blepharoplasty). Here’s how you voted:

A close race. Many of you attributed her new look to the hair. ‘Cause it’s all about the hair! Just ask Cynthia McKinney. Or the Capitol Police.

In the end, a majority of you concluded that yes, Pelosi has had a little nip and tuck. Based on the evidence, we’re not gonna argue.

Next week in Extreme Makeover: Watch Denny Hastert get liposuction!

Earlier: Extreme Makeover: Nancy Pelosi?

It’s the Thursday before a long holiday weekend. So we’ll pretend it’s Friday, and entertain your more frivolous inquiries. One of you writes:

Just a question — I just saw this photograph of Nancy Pelosi:

And it seems that, besides the haircut, she looks considerably different than here:

Did she have her eyes lifted? Crazy.

We’re no experts, so we’ll turn it over to you. What do you think? After the jump, a reader poll.

Here’s what we’d like to know from you:

• CIA Director Porter Goss called it quits this week, and didn’t make up a reason for leaving. Not even the standard “time with my family” excuse, which of course makes us think it had something to do with the hookers or the gambling and payola. Anyway, he’s back on the gulf shore already, and everyone is waiting to hear who the next shady character to take over the job is going to be.

• Scott McClellan gave his last press conference on Friday. The door did not hit his ass on the way out.

• In a drug-addled haze, Patrick Kennedy drove his car into a concrete barrier early Thursday morning. We were so hoping it was an 8-ball he chased with a liter of plastic-bottle vodka, but it looks like Pat is just your average congressional pill-popper. To add insult to self-induced injury, he only made it three blocks away from the bar before he crashed, which is nothing new for him. This was the straw that broke the camel’s back, though, and he’s admitted powerlessness and is heading to rehab. Godspeed Patrick, we’ll probably see you there soon.

• All the breaking real news wore us out, so we took a little break to talk some smack about Elaine Chao.

• Crazy-ass Zacarias Moussaoui gets to spend the rest of his life at a supermax prison in South Park Florence, Colorado.

• Dick Cheney is featured in the June Vanity Fair. The article confirms a lot of suspicions about him being a bit of an odd duck and a “big time” **** .

• We almost forgot, there was huge party last weekend that we wrote all about after sobering up. Of course after the party, there’s the after-party, and after the party it’s the hotel lobby.

One-point-six billion says the baby’s not Souter’s.

Anna Nicole Smith Pregnancy Rumors Swirl [AP]

Yesterday we did a little blogging about Labor Secretary Elaine Chao — a.k.a. Mrs. Mitch McConnell (address her that way, she loves it). We asked you for a little scuttlebutt about Secretary Chao. And then the floodgates opened.

After the jump, your catty comments and unverified gossip about our beloved Secretary of Labor.

Here are some of the things you had to say about Madam Chao. We’ll start with this one, ‘coz it’s our favorite:

When Elaine Chao was (briefly, thank god) director of the Peace Corps, she had a big problem with the concept of tinkling amongst other staff in the restrooms. So she tried to get her own installed in her office. A queen must have her throne. (P.S. I heard United Way practically PAID her to leave, she did so much damage.)

We’re not going to fault Secretary Chao for wanting a toilette privé; it’s quite understandable. We get a little gun-shy sometimes too.

If the toilet story is true, it wouldn’t be the first time Chao has had money management issues:

During her first term as Secretary she blew threw her discretionary funds (her “tea party fund”) in months, and when she was told she’d run out of money for parties and receptions, she tried to get her mitts on ODEP funds which the public can contribute to. How she spends her discretionary funds would make an interesting FOIA request…

Ah, Elaine… an Imelda after our own heart! Anyone know what kind of shoe collection she has? Is she as much of a shopaholic as Secretary Albright?

I’m always wondering if her hair and makeup people are on staff. I’m sure I’ve seen them with badges.

By the way… I’ve seen the stylists in the Francis Perkins Building. Not at home. At work. There’s some sort of room on the 6th floor near the cafeteria.

This is pretty awesome. Maybe Secretary Chao can bring a Hollywood make-up trailer onto the grounds at the DoL, with a big star on the door. She certainly thinks of herself as a star:

I’ve heard that it’s hard to be around her for more than short periods of time without hearing how she got her MBA at Harvard. Apparently she’s fairly proud of it. She also started some “MBA Fellows” program at DoL because she thinks an MBA makes you an incredibly better person.

Doesn’t President Bush have a Harvard MBA? QED.

Despite the Harvard pedigree, no one would mistake Secretary Chao for the Administration genius:

Elaine Chao is not only a diva but also the dumbest person in this administration — by far! If you have a minute, check out this March 4, 2004 House Ways and Means Committee hearing (transcript here), especially the Q&A between Charlie Rangel and Chao and Stephanie Tubbs Jones and Chao. Their questions relate to a report, which Chao claims the President did not sign (although his signature is on one of the first pages and it is the report of the President’s Council of Economic Advisers). As congressional hearings go, this one was as funny as they come.

Check out this exchange:

Mr. CARDIN. So, let me get to the most recent numbers that we have, and that is, in the second half of 2003 the Administration said that we would create 1.9 million jobs, and you feel 1.8 million short. Now, I don’t remember anything extraordinary happening in the second half of 2003, but do you have a justification as to why we fell so short in the second half of 2003? Ms. CHAO. Let me go back to your question about the two surveys.
Mr. CARDIN. I didn’t ask a question about the two surveys, and I really——
Ms. CHAO. Let me make a comment anyway, then. There are two surveys that the Bureau of Labor Statistics——
Mr. CARDIN. I am not interested in that.

Good strategy, Secretary Chao! Keep on talking about stuff they’re not interested in, and they’ll let you go eventually.

When it comes to congressional testimony, non-sequiturs are the name of the game. Perhaps Chao’s smarter than we thought.

Interview with Bush Labor Secretary Elaine L. Chao [Yahoo! Message Boards (satire)]
Hearing Before the Committee on Ways and Means [GPO]

Earlier: Madame Chao: Don’t Be Fooled By Her Cuteness

Yesterday we gave you two blind items for your consideration. Here’s the first (originally from Page Six):

WHICH Democratic party moneybags is getting divorced because he diddled with a candidate’s daughter? To cap it off, his wife, the mother of his children then had a go with her personal trainer (a woman)…

In the comments, the dominant response was George Zimmer, the founder and CEO of Men’s Wearhouse. By email, this additional response: “Terry McAuliffe with one of the Kerry daughters…. Or better yet, McAuliffe with one of the Bush twins. I would prefer the latter.”

And then the second item:

The daughter of a potential 2008 candidate was having a very spirited going-away party at the Tortilla Coast on Thursday night. Apparently she’s leaving Washington to work for her dad back at home. Quite a few staffers from various congressional offices were on hand, as well as close friends, roommates, and God only knows how many male admirers. Word is that in her new position she’ll be raising money for ‘08.

We received one, highly detailed response, which included some additional information about the alleged candidate in question. Check it out, after the jump.

So here’s the guess we received by email:

Tortilia Coast drunken binge for her going away party? Why, that’s Sarah Huckabee!!

[H]er father is deeply worried about fundraising in his home state and is officially holding off anouncing his run for President until 2007 (tentative date is February 1st or so). The reason is, according to Sarah, is that Mike is worried that if he anounces a run for President before he leaves office the Arkansans will turn on him; he has been keeping a watchful eye on the Hutchinson campaign as an indicator on his own chances in the greater scheme.

Why is she going back? Because she told her father she is ready to speak on his behalf in Arkansas and after months of prepping with a team of speechwriters from Little Rock and some folks from NGA to sharpen her public appearence. She’ll be turned loose as the official sweet-n-innocent face of the Huckabee down-home campaign.

Sweet-n-innocent? Well, just don’t tell the Arkansans about the inebriated blowout at Tortilla Coast.

(Jeez, it seems to be Mike Huckabee Day on this blog…)

Earlier: Blind Item Guessing Game: This One Has It All
Blind Item Guessing Game: The Hard-Partying Daughter
Mike Huckabee’s Media Meltdown

In case you haven’t noticed, we have a weakness for difficult women around here. High-handed women, like Katherine Harris and Cynthia McKinney, make for good copy.

So we’re growing increasingly intrigued by Labor Secretary Elaine Chao. Rumor has it that Chao, despite her endearing appearance and humble immigrant beginnings, is a self-promoting diva who loves the finer things in life. (Think J.Lo: the farther she’s traveled, the bigger the diva.)

We hear that Secretary Chao is visited at home, on a daily basis, by professional make-up and hair people. While she primps, her chauffeur waits outside, keeping the engine idling — to avoid wasting any time once she’s ready to go.

Finally, we hear that Secretary Chao has a penchant for self-promotion. Apparently this article, from last year, is just the tip of the iceberg.

We’ve heard some other things, too, but we’re not at liberty to share them just yet. If you have any gossip on Madam Secretary Chao, please send it our way.

Chao Aiming to Lead the Second-Tier Pack [WP]

(Ed. note: Please congratulate us for not using the term “Dragon Lady” in this post. Thank you.)

We seem to have cornered the market in blind items about misbehaving daughters of prominent politicians. First we asked you about a cokehead daughter, and then about one who had an affair with a fundraising powerhouse. And now, we bring you this little item (courtesy of a tipster):

The daughter of a potential 2008 candidate was having a very spirited going-away party at the Tortilla Coast on Thursday night. Apparently she’s leaving Washington to work for her dad back at home. Quite a few staffers from various congressional offices were on hand, as well as close friends, roommates, and God only knows how many male admirers. Word is that in her new position she’ll be raising money for ‘08.

If you have any thoughts on who our party girl might be, please post them in the comments, or email us (subject line: “Guessing Game”).

(The blind item we passed along earlier today hasn’t really captured your imagination; perhaps you’ll have more to say about this one.)

Earlier: Blind Item Guessing Game: This One Has It All
Guessing Game Results: The Cokehead Daughter
Blind Item Guessing Game: The Case of the Cokehead Daughter

Sure, they’re scandal-ridden, their credibility in tatters. But the Page Six people still come up with scrumptious blind items:

WHICH Democratic party moneybags is getting divorced because he diddled with a candidate’s daughter? To cap it off, his wife, the mother of his children then had a go with her personal trainer (a woman)…

Power, sex, money — and lesbianism. What more can want out of a blind item?

We invite your guesses as to the “moneybags” and candidate’s daughter in question, either in the comments or by email (subject line: “Guessing Game”). This should get pretty interesting, pretty fast.

• You have to respect hookers. Who else could take a regular oldho hum corruption case and make it really get interesting? This one could get very good, so keep watching — it’ll all be here.
• It’s just wait on see on our old buddy Karl too. All the orange jumpsuit pics will be here once we get ‘um.
• In the category of news that’s not news, but everyone wants to hear anyway, George Clooney spoke at the National Press Club. Swoon, swoon, loving sigh, swoon. Seems also that the light from George’s star burns so bright, it extinguishes other lesser, previously scheduled, stellar formations.
• Scott McCllelan has only been gone for a week and already Bush has a new lamb to lead to slaughter. They say Tony can take it though, that he’s a cool customer and part time rock god, but we’re reserving judgment til an .mp3 comes through. We did get a chance to go see for ourselves that everyone else was more than happy to line up for the gravy train.
• The kickball kids must have been too drunk to talk to reporters, and the non-profiter’s Ultimate league has already gone underground, so the Wall Street Journal (the paper to read if you really want to know what’s going on) put a little piece about Hill softball up on the front page and now all the staffers are a twitter. They’re not really fooling anyone (we already know what’s in the red cups) but the hitting and catching is a nice garnish.
• Don’t think we forgot there’s a huge party tonight. Wonkette’s gonna be there, and we’ll tell you all about it so it’ll be just like you were too.

Florida Attorney General Charlie Crist, a Republican candidate for governor, is being lampooned in a series of videos at a clever new website, SorryCharlie.com. Here’s a screengrab from one:

We hear the site has been developed by a creative Democrat who wants to diminish support for Crist by exposing him as a closeted… liberal. Draw your own conclusions.

SorryCharlie.com
FL: Breaking: AG Crist NOT Gay! [Daily Kos]
Woman-lover Charlie Crist is Not Gay [Towleroad]

And now, some news from the Land of Enchantment. The Albuquerque Journal reports:

A well-known blog chronicling Washington, D.C., politics and Beltway gossip reported that Gov. Bill Richardson recently hosted a retreat to “refine his national message” in preparation for a 2008 presidential run.

Richardson gubernatorial campaign manager Amanda Cooper said the site got it wrong: While Richardson did call campaign experts to the Governor’s Mansion in Santa Fe to discuss campaign strategy, Cooper said the meeting centered on his 2006 re-election campaign for governor.

Yeah, sure. And Hillary’s just focused on her reelection to the Senate. ‘Cause she really needs to raise a gajillion dollars to defeat… who’s she running against again?

Governor Richardson, there’s no need to be coy about your 2008 ambitions. At least one reader of ours is a huge fan. Check out his manifesto, in support of the proposition that “Bill Richardson MUST be the next Democratic candidate,” after the jump.

Here it is:

First and formost, [Richardson] clearly likes the ladies. America likes its Democrats (when it likes them at all) randy. Show me another Democrat who’s clearly liked sexin’ since Clinton. Gore? Please. The man was an asexual stump. Kerry? I think we all know that if it came to a nationwide poll, a plurality of Americans would pick “Gayer than a Christmas tree” to describe Mr. fancypants wind-surfer. Windsurfing. He’s not even a real surfer.

Sexy democrats make Republicans act all old testament on Meet the Press, and that tips just enough of the apathetic middle into the “good times” camp. If he’s really smart, Richardson will announce his candidacy while being fellated by a transvestite. In Tijuana.

Sounds like a brilliant strategy to us. Bill, if you’d like to hire our source as a consultant for your 2008 campaign, drop us a line and we’ll put you in touch.

Gov. Disputes Blog Story About Retreat [Albuquerque Journal (subscription req’d)]

Earlier: The 2008 Rumor Mill Is in Full Churn

• The tasteful classic rock hits finally stopped playing, and when they did, Scotty was the one without the chair. We heard later that maybe he never even had a chance.

• We wouldn’t have called it WEDNESDAY MORNING MASSACRETTE just for Scotty. Turns out Turd Blossom has a new job too.

• Wonkette loves a power vacuum. Who, oh who, will not be answering Helen Thomas’s questions now? Qualifications required: 1. Republican 2. Has been on TV.

• It wasn’t all White House this week. In fact, once we heard about Kathrine Harris’s bus tour — not to mention her attempted seduction of a college journalist — we forgot all about the Massacrette.

• You have to respect a congresswoman who’s not afraid to call it like she sees it. We’ve even started emulating her, and so can you, unless you’re too big of an **** .

• Some people are always looking for signs that the apocalypse is upon us; if you’re one of them, you had a pretty blockbuster week.

• Some too-old-to-hack-it-anymore retired generals are calling for Donald Rumsfeld’s resignation, but Bush says he’s the “decider,” and his decision is: Rummy stays. The President doesn’t want anyone making fun of him anymore either. He’s smart really, just maybe more of “wikilectual,” than, you know, an intellect-ual.

• Loyal readers, you never cease to amaze us. We pose one simple question about some good old-fashioned congressional adultery, and you deluge us with emails filled with your hopes and dreams.

• Way to go, Washington Post! You totally kicked some Times ass, and all thanks to Robin Givhan, who heard the news while wearing an ivory crewneck sweater that was a perfect metaphor for the simple, yet complex task of writing about famous peoples’ clothes, which itself is a reflection of the world’s preoccupation with image as perception, and sometimes a red tie is just a red tie, and she really wants to thank the little people, and oh! thankyou, thankyou, thankyou, air kisses for everyone!

So who’s going to replace Scott McClellan? Truth be told, there’s not much new on that front. Executive summary: Any Republican who has ever been on TV is under consideration.

The Post reports that it’s between Tony Snow, the Fox News radio host; Dan Senor, former Iraq occupation spokesman (and hubby of Campbell Brown); Victoria Clarke, former Pentagon spokeshottie (and current CNN contributor); and Rob Nichols, former Treasury spokesman. The Times mentions Snow, Clarke, and Nichols (but notes, as we did yesterday, Clarke’s claim that she’s not interested).

Hotline helpfully summarizes some opinions from yesterday. Keith Olbermann is focused on Snow, Clarke, and Senor (but noted that all three raise conflicts issues with Fox, CNN, and NBC, respectively). John Roberts of CNN is betting on Snow or Nichols. George Stephanopoulos is “betting Senor will get the job”; Rachel Sklar agrees. Dana Milbank jokes, with respect to Tony Snow: “Is this just the beginning of a trend? Does Sean Hannity replace Rumsfeld at the Pentagon? Does Bill O’Reilly get the FBI?”

Oh, Dana…

Rove Gives Up Policy Post in Shake-Up [WP]
Rove Is Giving Up Daily Policy Post to Focus on Vote [NYT]
Hotline After Dark [Hotline On Call]
George Stephanopoulos: What’s the real news today? [The World Newser]
Senor Senor, I Presume [HuffPo]

We’d like to write about something else; really, we would. But the departure of Scott McClellan and the changing responsibilities of Karl Rove are all that people are talking about today.

Let’s see, what have we heard… Word on the street is that this wasn’t Scott’s decision. This makes sense, given that McClellan’s explanation of his departure at this morning’s press conference was vague and lame. His departure may be best explained by the White House’s desire to remove the Rummy resignation calls from the front pages of the nation’s newspapers.

We also hear that Josh Bolten told McClellan only yesterday that he would be leaving. Ouch. (Of course, reports that Bolten was shopping Scotty’s job around earlier this week were not a good sign; McClellan may have seen the writing on the wall.)

As for McClellan’s likely successor, Hotline is all over the story. The latest news: hottie-cum-firecracker Torie Clark, who regularly goes toe-to-toe with Paul Begala on CNN, does not want the job. Neither does Dan Bartlett. We can’t really blame them.

Here are three new names to add to the mix: Mark Corallo, Trent Duffy, and Mark Pfeifle. We reported earlier that Duffy previously expressed no interest in the job; but Bolten, to whom he is close, may be able to change his mind.

And that’s the latest unsubstantiated speculation and wild rumor about your next White House press secretary.