Remember that possible media bias scandal at the St. Petersburg Times? Here’s the paper’s explanation:

Talk about embarrassing. We’re still adjusting to our recently overhauled system for processing stories here at the SPT, and it showed big time on our website today. It seems that in processing the syndicated column of satirist Andy Borowitz someone mistakenly labeled it to appear on the site as a straight news story. So it appeared online as a normal wire compilation. Headline: “Satan, Rove plot GOP campaign strategy.” Sheepishly, Buzz can confirm Satan and Rove are not in fact plotting anything together that we know of.

The piece was deleted from our website when we realized the mistake, but at least a couple other sites found it and saved it for posterity. The result can be seen here at Hotline on Call and here at Wonkette.

Rove spoke to Online City Editor Kevin McGeever, and was exceptionally gracious. He thought it was funny and noted that he’d been accused of being Satan, but never actually working with Beelzebub. He wanted a copy of the online story for himself.

So it wasn’t bias, just incompetence. We feel so much better.

Rove, Satan And Egg on Our Face [The Buzz/St. Petersburg Times]

Earlier: St. Petersburg ‘Times’: Best Newspaper in America

• When everything that’s soulless and wrong becomes a Power Point slide. [The Nation]

• Tonight, Larry King will cry himself to sleep with more and larger tears than last night. Also, more sobbing. [Extreme Mortman]

• Bush must’ve been in Iraq when Bill Frist’s “Over Off the Hill” card got passed around. [Think Progress]

• The World Cup may halt wars, but a coupla’ free pints later. it might be a bloody tax liability. Sorry mate. [Tax Prof]

• Ann Coulter’s staying in the land of earthquakes and high crime rates. [LAist]

• Gitmo Prisoners, Elvis, and the toilet-assisted deaths they shared. [1115.org via DCeiver]

• The sandstone walls at 1600 Pennsylvania are bursting with beauty. We decided to play the wicked stepmother and ask, “Who’s the fairest of them all?” There are fine choices, whether you prefer men or women. In the off chance that you prefer to pass judgment using more than a thumbnail photo, we’ve even provided testimonials: boys here and girls here. Polls close Monday morning at 10, and for God’s sake no cheating please.

• Proof that “Republican Strategist” is fast becoming an oxymoron, as Jack Burkman offers cash for a lesbian to have sex with him. In case she changes her mind, Jack made sure she had one of his business cards. Stay classy Jack.

• President Bush didn’t get anything to eat on the way back from Iraq, so after landing he went and put his foot straight in his mouth. We weren’t the only ones who found it funny, but after the all the jokes this story has a happy ending.

• We scored an interview with former adult actress-cum-Nevada gubernatorial candidate Mimi Miyagi. But it looks like porn stars will do anybody.

• Former FEMA director Michael Brown sent us an email, proving he can both read and write.

• The circus won’t be coming to town now that Rove’s off the hook.

Our story about President Bush’s unfortunate exchange with L.A. Times reporter Peter Wallsten got picked up by many news outlets — both real and fake:

It’s all in the delivery, isn’t it?

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart

Earlier: President Bush’s “Oh, **** ” Moment of the Day
Breaking: President Bush Apologizes to Peter Wallsten

Ah, the power of the blogosphere. We were the first to report on President Bush teasing reporter Peter Wallsten for wearing “shades” at a Rose Garden press conference — sunglasses that Wallsten wears because he’s legally blind. Wallsten suffers from Stargardt’s disease, which causes vision loss.

And now, news of a presidential apology:

Wallsten said Bush called his cell phone later in the day to apologize and tell him that he didn’t know he had [Stargardt’s] disease. Wallsten said he interrupted and told the president that no apology was necessary and that he didn’t feel offended since he hadn’t told anyone at the White House about his condition.

More details, after the jump.

Additional info from the AP story:

“[Bush] said, `I needle you guys out of affection,’” Wallsten said. “I said, ‘I understand that, but I don’t want you to treat me any differently because of this.’”

Wallsten said the president said he would not treat him differently, so Wallsten encouraged him to “needle away.”

“He said, `I will. Next time I’ll just use a different needle,’” Wallsten said.

Wallsten said he thought that was a pretty good line. And his only complaint is that the president didn’t answer his question at the news conference.

Both President Bush and Peter Wallsten are to be commended for their graciousness. And if the president cuts back on his “clowning with the press” as a result of this incident, then some good has come of it.

Bush Apologizes to L.A. Times Reporter [AP]
Bush’s Banter Goes Too Far: Taunting a Blind Man [HuffPo]

Earlier: Presidents Get Jet Lag Too
President Bush’s “Oh, **** ” Moment of the Day
An Update on President Bush’s Screw-Up
The Rose Garden Press Conference Video

In President Bush’s defense, he may not have known that Peter Wallsten is legally blind. And Wallsten said he was not offended by the president’s remarks. But the president still looks pretty silly when he chuckles at the end of this video.

President Bush To Legally Blind Reporter: ‘Are You Going to Ask That Question with Shades On?’ [Think Progress]

Earlier: An Update on President Bush’s Screw-Up
President Bush’s “Oh, **** ” Moment of the Day

Earlier today, we broke the story of how President Bush poked fun at reporter Peter Wallsten for wearing sunglasses while asking a question. Wallsten, it turns out, is legally blind.

The crew over at Think Progress has followed up on our scoop; check out their work here. They interviewed Wallsten, obtained the transcript of the exchange, and grabbed a video clip of it, too.

We also reprint the transcript here, after the jump.

Our recollection of the exchange wasn’t exact, but it was close enough. Here’s the relevant portion of the transcript:

THE PRESIDENT: Yes, Peter. Are you going to ask that question with shades on?

Q I can take them off.

THE PRESIDENT: I’m interested in the shade look, seriously.

Q All right, I’ll keep it, then.

THE PRESIDENT: For the viewers, there’s no sun. (Laughter.)

Q I guess it depends on your perspective. (Laughter.)

THE PRESIDENT: Touche. (Laughter.)

Q Following up on the other Peter’s question about Karl Rove…

President Bush To Legally Blind Reporter: ‘Are You Going to Ask That Question with Shades On?’ [Think Progress]

Update: Here is a video clip of the exchange.

Earlier: President Bush’s “Oh, **** ” Moment of the Day
Presidents Get Jet Lag Too

Earlier today, we described an exchange at this morning’s press conference between President Bush and Peter Wallsten of the Los Angeles Times. President Bush joked about Wallsten’s wearing sunglasses while asking his question.

We called it the best exchange of the conference; but it was even better than we thought. A tipster points out:

For what it matters, during the Bush Rose Garden presser this a.m., Wallsten was wearing shades because he is legally blind — a fact that Bush apparently didn’t know, or forgot, about one of the reporters covering him for one of America’s major newspapers.

Way to go, Mr. President.

Latest update: President Bush has apologized to Wallsten.

Update: An excerpt from the transcript, with the exact exchange, is available here. A video clip of the incident is accessible here.

Earlier: Presidents Get Jet Lag Too

As one of you aptly noted, “DHS is serious about this ‘internet’ thing.” Here’s a little more on why Homeland Security cut New York’s antiterrorism funding:

Federal officials said yesterday that the city had not only done a poor job of articulating its needs in its application, but had also mishandled the application itself, failing to file it electronically as required, instead faxing its request to Washington.

C’mon, Secretary Chertoff, cut New York a little slack. Have you ever tried filling out a PDF with tooltip text? E-filing can be such a bitch!

City Has Itself to Blame for Terror Cuts, U.S. Says [NYT]
Earlier: East Coast Roolz! Midwest Droolz!

Namely, the environment immediately surrounding her multimillion-dollar mansion, high in the Pacific Heights neighborhood of San Francisco.

We previously linked to real estate porn of Senator Feinstein’s palatial residence. We now learn, via the San Francisco Chronicle, that recent landscaping changes by DiFi have infuriated city officials and her neighbors.

Details appear after the jump.

The Chronicle reports:

[W]orkers remodeling the Pacific Heights mansion that [Dianne Feinstein and her super-rich husband Dick Blum] just bought leveled all the green in the adjoining public garden — without the city’s approval. And not just any green — we’re talking about a Tivoli-style garden just off the front entrance of the couple’s $16.5 million abode, which sits at the foot of Vallejo Street, between the Presidio and some of the city’s most posh residences.

The garden is actually part of the city-owned Lyon Street steps — a favorite of joggers, walkers and tourists looking for a picture-postcard view, and even for teenagers looking to sneak a late-night drink or two.

City officials were surprised and upset. But so was Senator Feinstein:

“I went ballistic,” Feinstein told us. “I didn’t want to take it out. … I could have used it. Now I have to do a whole new sprinkler system.”

Our heart goes out to you, Senator Feinstein! Would that we all had such problems…

Check out the “before” and “after” photos here. Who knew Hurricane Katrina made it all the way to the West Coast?

Trouble at Di’s Palace? [SFLuxe]
Bloom Is Off the Rose for Public Garden at Feinstein Mansion [San Francisco Chronicle]

Earlier: Remainders: You Backed the Right Horse

Slow news day so far — CNN is reporting on the prosecution of a German cannibal. So we bring you these two screen caps. This one’s from the New York Sun:

And this one’s from the Note:

D-OH, indeed. Our correspondent observes: “I’m not saying anything negative about Detroit… but I don’t think Ohio would want it included within their borders.”

(Yeah, we know, we make mistakes like this all the time. But we don’t have copy editors. We’re bloggers, and making mistakes is in our job description.)

CIA Nominee Gains Backing In the Senate [NY Sun]
The Note

Sometimes books get pulled due to massive and widespread plagiarism. And sometimes they get pulled for more amusing reasons. Consider what happened to Leaving Women Behind : Modern Families Outdated Laws:

There is a misspelled word in the Foreward by Senator Kay Bailey Hutchison, a Republican from Texas. On page vii of her brief 2-page Foreword, Senator Hutchison’s 2nd of 5 paragraphs begins:

“Despite these remarkable changes, and the major progress women have made in obtaining equality in the workplace, our pubic policy institutions have not kept pace.”

The word should have been public. Can you imagine the discussions between the senator’s staff and the publisher when they found out? Can’t help but feel for the people whose job it was to proofread that piece at both ends.

Oops! Some poor staffer probably got canned over this. But maybe Senator Hutchison deserves part of the blame.

Even if some staffer drafted the foreword, it was only two pages long — the Senator should have proofread it herself. But that Senator Hutchison, she’s “spacey.”

Book recall [Amazon]
The book recall mystery solved [Amazon]

But he did have what sounds like a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. Here’s what actually happened with respect to yesterday’s White House pool report, from Mr. Lewis himself (whose email we reprint with his permission):

You might have at least picked up on my invitation to call for details. No, I didn’t oversleep — I’m recovering from surgery and my pain pills didn’t kick in until 4 a.m. There was a communications mixup with my back up meaning the one and only poolable event - Bush’s appearance with the governors — was uncovered. Scott’s announcement and the aborted takeoff were open coverage, and therefore not my responsibility. I included those items only for the sake of the making a little fun of myself — systems failures etc. I arrived in the office to deal with the missed pool assignment with four hours sleep and my arm in a sling.

We apologize to Finlay Lewis, a well-respected veteran of the White House press corps, for the incorrect implications of our original post. As for why we didn’t call him for details, well, we’re bloggers — we can’t remember the last time we picked up the phone!

(When we’ve called people in the past, in our feeble attempt to engage in this thing you call “reporting,” we’ve gotten less than stellar responses.)

Earlier: Wednesday Morning Massacrette: Have You Seen This Man?

[Update: Please see this correction/clarification.]

Look, we’re the last people to call someone out for oversleeping — we do it all the time. The number of times we hit the “snooze” button sometimes reaches the double digits.

But we’re not White House pool reporters. And we weren’t AWOL on one of the biggest news mornings in recent memory (even if our servers might have been, temporarily).

Check it out:

From: White House Press Releases Sent: Wednesday, April 19, 2006 12:03 PM
Subject: POOL REPORT #1, 4/19/06

POOL REPORT #1

April 19, 2006

It was a morning of massive systems failures.

Failure number one: In an attempt to shed its reputation as a crack news gathering machine, the Copley News Service managed to screw up its pool duty. The details are too trivial and boring to recite here but the curious may call and I will sheepishly supply. That there is any pool report at all is entirely due to the gracious and patient help of Reuters’ crack WH staff, Patty Wilson in particular.

So pool reporter Finlay Lewis implies that he didn’t oversleep — but he doesn’t outright deny it either. He seems to be suggesting that, well, he just kinda forgot that he was on today (“managed to screw up its pool duty”). Not sure if that’s much better.

**** — what a day for forgetfulness! You miss one little morning of pool reporting, and the new chief of staff goes and shakes everything up on you. Life is so unfair!

The full mea culpa appears after the jump. (We won’t mock Lewis too much, since he does quite a bit himself.)

Here is Finlay Lewis’s full pool report (such as it is):

From: White House Press Releases
Sent: Wednesday, April 19, 2006 12:03 PM
Subject: POOL REPORT #1, 4/19/06

POOL REPORT #1

April 19, 2006

It was a morning of massive systems failures.

Failure number one: In an attempt to shed its reputation as a crack news gathering machine, the Copley News Service managed to screw up its pool duty. The details are too trivial and boring to recite here but the curious may call and I will sheepishly supply. That there is any pool report at all is entirely due to the gracious and patient help of Reuters’ crack WH staff, Patty Wilson in particular.

Failure number two: Another machine, Marine One, didn’t feel up to flying this morning.

Enough negativity.

The morning began with the one scripted event on tap before departure:

The president’s South Lawn appearance with four governors recently returned from Afghanistan, Kuwait and Iraq. You have the transcript, but the intrepid quartet was Joe Manchin, R-W Va., Jeb Bush, R-Fla., Mitch Daniels, R-Ind., and Tom Vilsack, D-Iowa.

The statements finished, everybody retreated to their White House haunts awaiting Marine One’s departure, an open event. With about two minutes notice, the press was alerted to an impending presidential statement.

That, of course, had to do with Press Secretary Scott McClellan’s decision to resign.

Transcript has moved on that event as well. Scott seemed somewhat choked with emotion as he delivered the news. (It must have been the thought of saying farewell to our sunny personalities.) The president, at one point, placed a hand on his shoulder.

They then moved to the temperamental helicopter.

Boarding along with the president and McClellan was a clutch of staff including Karl Rove and Joe Hagin. The doors closed, the rotors started, and then stopped about a minute later. The door opened, and the staff exited by the rear door, while Bush reappeared at the front. With something of a smile and a shoulder shrug, he said, “We have an issue with the helicopter. Everybody’s safe.”

Hagin approached the stakeout to say the unscripted turn of events was due to an “avionics” problem.

The president later motorcaded to Andrews.

Again, with apologies,

Finlay Lewis
Copley
[telephone number redacted so you don’t all call poor Mr. Lewis to make fun of him]

Remember how much fun we made of Joseph Curl’s half-assed pool report? Well, at least he bothered to show up!

And when it comes to pool reporting, showing up is half the battle.

Update/Correction: For the Record: Finlay Lewis Did Not Oversleep
Earlier: The White House Press Pool: Drowning in Boredom
Because He Does Care: Joseph Curl’s Remedial Pool Report

Jeez, this Rob Portman character — the new head of the Office of Management and Budget — appears to be a real sleeper. At 11:37 AM, Sen. Harry Reid’s office sent out the following statement by email:

Oops! Correction needed. At 11:58 AM, they disseminated this message (marked “CORRECTED — PLEASE USE THIS VERSION”):

The upshot? Rob Portman is SO BORING, he doesn’t even have a nickname. And certainly not a fun, vaguely fratty one, like Yosh.

Thus far, Josh Bolten’s “shake-up” isn’t adding much sizzle to the White House ranks. Where’s Bo Derek when you need her?

Earlier: Seemingly Boring Guy Appointed Head of Important-but-Boring Position

Oooh boy. First came this incident; and now, from Bellevue, Washington, we get this:

A controversial question given to students during a practice test for a math final at Bellevue Community College has students — and others — shaking their heads because of its lack of racial sensitivity….

The question read: “Condoleezza holds a watermelon just over the edge of the roof of the 300-foot Federal Building, and tosses it up with a velocity of 20 feet per second.”

The Condoleezza question went on to ask when the watermelon will hit the ground, based on a formula provided.

We’d like to know: If it takes the president of Bellevue Community College 5 seconds to walk 10 feet, and the teacher’s classroom is located 300 feet from the president’s office, how long did it take for this math teacher to get fired?

(As it turns out, the professor didn’t get fired. Instead, he “apologized and requested cultural sensitivity training.” Which is pretty much the first time in human history that someone requested sensitivity training.)

Condoleezza ‘Watermelon’ Test Question Raises Ire [NBC10]

Earlier: We Are Totally, Totally, Totally, Totally, Totally Sorry For This
An Addendum: Doing Live Radio Is Hard

Check out this “politics quiz” in the Post:

Corporate-Casual sums it up perfectly.

We would just add: “C’mon, Posties, no one would fall for answer (b). Everyone knows that’s Barney Frank’s slogan!”

Washington Post. Washington Nasty. [corporate casual]

Earlier: A Fun Riddle from KidsPost

Heh, we think we know how this happened. Remember how Liberian president Ellen Johnson Sirleaf visited the White House last month? We bet that some social secretary opened up a document called “Sirleaf Reception Guest List.doc,” did a “Save As,” and tinkered a little — but not enough…

Perhaps the White House is as excited about President Kufuor’s visit as pool reporter Joseph Curl.