Wonk’d: The Breeders

The American political elite are enviable in so many ways. Doesn’t everyone wish they had a really good-looking family, like Dick Gephardt’s? Or a culturally sensitive patriarch, like Karl Rove? Perhaps there is more admiration for our great athletes — like Yankees players Mike Mussina and Alex Rodriguez, who both have tons of fans — even if Jeff Gannon isn’t one. In any case, just sit back and have a beer like Tim Russert, or go Patrick Kennedy-style with an iced tea — there’s lots more wonk’d after the jump.

There’s no way that baseball hats and sunglasses can keep any celebs from getting wonk’d by you hardworking tipsters. Once you’ve discovered their charade, email us, with “Wonk’d” or “Sighting” in the subject line (and the name of the “brity” that should have known better). You keep a sendin’, we’ll keep a postin’, and they’ll keep pretendin’ to be surprised when they’re spotted.

READ MORE: Donna Brazile, Jeff Gannon, John Walsh, Mark Shields, Personalities, Pete Ricketts, Ralph Hall, ben nelson, celebrities, dennis hastert, dick gephardt, famous-for-dc, famous-for-famous, james carville, joey cheek, john kerry, karl rove, lindsey graham, mary landrieu, newt gingrich, patrick kennedy, robert novak, tim russert, wonk’d, yankees

Gossip Roundup: Lots of Snow

• Reliable Source: Cheney, at Fox News party, says Tony Snow will “do a superb job”… George Clooney, Joey Cheek in town for Sunday’s “Save Darfur” rally. [WP]
• Rush & Molloy: Rupert Murdoch to Snow: “Congratulations on your promotion - or maybe it’s a demotion.” [NYDN]
• Page Six: Snow isn’t “the greatest sax player”… Gen. Richard Myers dining at Da Tommaso in New York… Valerie Plame gets star treatment at a Vanity Fair party at the Tribeca Film Festival. [NYP]
• Inside the Beltway: Washington Life magazine hosts celebrity luncheon today, ahead of Correspondents’ Dinner. [WT]

READ MORE: Personalities, dick cheney, george clooney, joey cheek, richard myers, rupert murdoch, tony snow, valerie plame, vanity fair, washington life, wcha, wchd

Chatology: Defining Victory Down

This Sunday’s shows undertook a major military operation. Between the anniversary of the invasion of Iraq and “Operation Swarmer,” talking heads all but saluted. Russ Feingold managed to grab some of the spotlight, and his motion to censure President Bush gave Bill Kristol another chance to rock Chris Wallace’s world: Feingold “is smarter than the Democratic congressional leadership” and “deserves credit for taking a principled stand, and I honestly think he’s winning this debate.” That sound you heard is Nancy Pelosi’s head exploding. Dick Cheney did “Face the Nation” but did not make much news beyond the world’s most awesome Freudian slip: “Most of my predecessors spent a good part of their time as President—Vice President running for President.

Also, debuting this week on ABCNews.com was “The Green Room,” a brave attempt to wring every possible bit of hot air from the “This Week” panel while they stand around uncomfortably after the show wraps in the nondescript, motel-ish decor of ABC’s DeSale St. digs. Personally, I have always found pre-show green room chatter more interesting (everyone’s trying out their lines) and the whole thing strikes me as an empty attempt to show us another side of people who are basically one-dimensional, but I applaud this Taylorite approach to news content and hope that less practiced pundits do something stupid and/or inspired backstage in the future.

Top topics: Iraq, Feingold’s censure motion and by extension the NSA wiretap program.

One-hit wonders: Boston College’s Sweet Sixteen chances (“Meet the Press”); Joey Cheek, humanitarian (“This Week”); Mark McClellan, TREKKIE (“Fox News Sunday”)

Quotes to live by:
• Dick Cheney admits that shooting someone in the face is “one of those situations that’s difficult, that generates controversy.”
• Chris Wallace, SUPER GENIUS: “It seems to me that the Senators who are most critical of [the NSA wiretapping] program are the ones who know the least about it.”
• George Will lays it out: “We need to define victory down.”
• Sam Donaldson is totally high: “Russ Feingold threw the long ball… but it might connect, as the Washington Redskins learned in the mid-70s.”

Also, Shorter Chris Matthews Show: David Gregory observed that “George Bush is the George Clooney of Washington… but that’s a little bit of a patina.” Wha?

Full rundown appears after the jump.

READ MORE: NCAA Tournament, Personalities, ana marie cox, basketball, bill clinton, bill kristol, bob schieffer, bode miller, brit hume, censure, chatology, chris wallace, christopher hitchens, chuck hagel, cokie roberts, dick cheney, dick durbin, donald rumsfeld, eavesdropping, face the nation, fox news, george casey, george stephanopoulos, george tenet, george will, hunting accidents, iraq, jack reed, jackie spinner, joey cheek, john murtha, juan williams, mara liasson, march madness, mark mcclellan, meet the press, michael gordon, nancy pelosi, nsa, operation swarmer, original wonkette, ralph peters, russ feingold, saddam hussein, sam donaldson, ted kennedy, this week, tim russert, top

Gossip Roundup: Jessica, We Hardly Knew Ye

• Reliable Source: Jessica Simpson maintains smile throughout brief trip to Capitol Hill… Gore may have exaggerated the response of conservatives to his film… Olympic speedskater Joey Cheek meets Bush, Pelosi. [WP]
• Inside the Beltway: After Sunday services, Bush changes from his suit to his biking gear faster than a speeding bullet… Scott McClellan on rumors of a shakeup: “This is part of the inside Washington babble that goes on in this town. It’s part of the parlor game.” [WT]
• Page Six: Susan Sarandon on Sen. Clinton: “I find Hillary to be a great disappointment… She’s not worse than other politicians, but I hoped she would be better. What America is looking for is authentic people who want to go into public service because they strongly believe in something, not people who are [just] trying to get elected.” [NYP]

READ MORE: 2008, Personalities, al gore, bush, george w. bush, gossip, hillary clinton, jessica simpson, joey cheek, nancy pelosi, rumors, scott mcclellan, susan sarandon