Wonkette

Michael Chertoff knows that children are our future. That why he wants to scare the shit out of them with the Department of Homeland Security’s new just-fer-kidz preparedness campaign “Ready Kids” (cute font, etc.).Curious about how we, too, could be Ready Kids, we checked out the newly launched web site — tragically, we weren’t ready, kids, for what we found there.

PEOPLE OF WASHINGTON — THE DEPARTMENT OF HOMELAND SECURITY HAS BEEN INFILTRATED BY HUMAN-ANIMAL HYBRIDS. ABANDON YOUR HOME OR PLACE OF WORK AND FLEE.

For a Preparedness Teaching Gig, Chertoff Hires This Cat With 9 Lives [WP]
Ready Kids [DHS]