An Open Letter to David Mamet

David:

We like you, we really do. One of us used to study theater, and there’s no doubt in our minds that you’re one of the great American playwrights. Man, even Ronin was really awesome! This is why this hurts us so much: Please don’t blog. Please. Just stop.

If you’re not willing to stop blogging, please stop posting your cartoons on your blog. Having made fun of you for this already, we were extremely dismayed to find that you’d done it again. This one, Dave, this one is even worse. Words cannot begin to express how terrible that cartoon is. We even tried to make another cartoon that was even worse, just to try to show you where you went wrong, but we don’t actually think it succeeded in out-sucking yours. Look:

Dave. You’re — you’re fucking killing us, Dave. You’re — it’s just, Dave, for fuckssake, we don’t (pause) — we don’t write fucking plays, Dave, and we’d prefer it if you didn’t blog.

Yours,
Wonkette

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