Wonkette

NEVER FORGET 7/26/2007

I can't wait 'till a suspicious white powder is found by Whitehouse cleaning staff in a baggie in the drawer of the President's desk in the Oval Office.

"It isn't mine! Honest! I was just holding it for a friend. Where's my lawyer? Beeeertoooo!"

How is it the Guardian jumped on this before CNN??? Does their superior intelligence extend even this far? More to the point, has Lindsay Lohan been located since she went into hiding?

It was aspirin. In a little envelope. Apparently no one there ever took a BC powder before. Best thing for a hangover ever invented BTW.

That's what he gets for using a prop phone. Time to upgrade to jet like the rest of us, Orville.

Now I'm all nostalgic for September 12, when everyone went insane, nothing made any sense, and Bush had an approval rating in the low 90's

That image just reminds me that hair bands were the hipsters of the '80s.

Did ABC publish compromising photos of the bush twins ??? Hmmm ... ABC is going to learn the hard way, like bob stevens, don't mess.

@ DavidFlores:
At least Bush might have some idea as to whose pants he's wearing... one would hope.

That stuff is dangerous! Let me dispose of it safely! What is it, about an 8-ball?

And who writes the headlines for that site, anyway? "Tour de France faces an uphill climb"???

Everyone knows they were in the flats today, don't they?

Somebody's delivery of Peruvian Marching Powder just got misdirected. Lets go through the likely suspects:

Charlie Gibson
Elizabeth Vargas
Michel Martin
John Stossel

Anyone I miss?

This isn't even on the ABC News site. Maybe something is really happening, and the Administration is crapping themselves. A real terrorist attack and not just booga-booga? To the undisclosed location, stat!

Marion Barry knows what to do with that dangerous white powder.

@Hans_Auff:

We really should get Mr. Barry and Lindsay Lohan together. Now that would be a party.

Damn. Asprin. I had five bucks on "powdered donut residue."

I really shouldn't have my donut mailed to me through fedex. It's just so ordinary just having the guy just give it to me over the counter. Something more is needed.

I hope it was BABY aspirin, buncha pussies.