Shoplifts Shoots And Leaves

Boise Burglary Suspect Is One Sad Panda

Photo courtesy Hundred Acre Wood P.D.
Sometimes you just need to get out the ol’ rainbow-puking gnome, and today is one of those days, because today, Tuesday, December Second, in the Year of Our Lord Two Thousand Fourteen, we learned that an 18-year-old woman was arrested for shoplifting by Boise Police late last night, and ...
  sucks to be you

Obama Taps Some Nerd To Babysit Wars For Next Two Years

Some guy, who knows?
Ever since the White House told Secretary of Defense Chuck Hagel to GTFO, pretty much every potential replacement for the job has been busy shouting “Not it!” Because really, what sane person would want the thankless job of overseeing our various international clusterfucks? After, ...
  The Second Amendment Is Not A Toy

Grown-Up Baked Mac And Cheese Recipe For Grown-Ups

Baking macaroni and cheese on a Monday night was a miserable experience. I had to boil water, tear the hell out of cheese, make a sauce, and then bake this whole deal before I had a chance to take off my bra. When I finally had time to sit down and browse through Faceborg, about ten million ...
  Here have some news n stuff

Mean Harry Reid Might Make Senators Do Some Work In December

Sooooooooo mean!
Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid is one mean grinch. Because the Senate, as well as the House of Representatives, has been so busy not working all year, Reid’s threatening to murder Christmas vacation, which for most Americans is maybe a day or two, but for the lazy sacks of lazy in ...
  What About A Travel Ban?

Oh Great, Now Obama Wants To Cure AIDS

As if Obummer hasn’t done enough to destroy America, now he wants to cure AIDS. Ugh, what next, cheap gas? Instead of showing true leadership by ignoring AIDS completely, like a real president would, or having his drug czar explain how marijuana leads to being gay leads to dying of AIDS, ...
  Haw Haw Good One!

Sarah Palin Made A Funny About Ferguson

Oh, we get it!
After having said pretty much nothing about the shooting of Michael Brown in Ferguson, Missouri, occasional reality television show front-woman Sarah Palin finally shared her thoughts with America over the weekend by reposting to her MyFacePlace page a joke from rightwing conspiracy website Mad ...
  Today In Why Bill Kristol Is A Idiot

Bill Kristol Has Learned The Real Lesson Of Ferguson

Someone help him, please
Ever since Bill Kristol got himself a Twitter account, we’ve been enjoying his condensed doses of S-M-R-T. Like that time he admitted he’s kind of stupid, or his wish that Richard Nixon would come back and save us. But now, having waded a bit into the technological ocean, Bill ...
  Thanks a lot ladies

Now It’s The Stupid Feminists Who Killed Michael Brown

The feminists did it, with their feminism
There is so much blame to go around for the death of Ferguson teenager Michael Brown. St. Louis prosecutor Bob McCullough said, when explaining why there was simply no reason at all to indict Officer Darren Wilson, that it was basically social media’s fault for saying things on The ...
  God Tells Congressional Aide To Lay Off Teenagers

Klassy GOP Lady Real Sorry For Calling Obama Daughters Skanks

You’ve probably heard by now about the bravest American in America, who bravely shamed first daughters Malia and Sasha Obama for disgracing themselves and America and mom and apple pie by being teenagers, standing around like a couple of teenagers, making bored teenage faces at their ...
  No vaccine For Stupid

Quack Anti-Vaxxers: Protect Your Kids With Sugar Instead

Also, many car accidents aren't fatal, so I don't wear seatbelts.
Just in case you needed a reason to slap your forehead and despair for humanity this morning, how about a recent report from CBC’s Marketplace program on anti-vaccine myths being fed to new parents in the Great White North, eh? Using hidden cameras, reporters visited several Canadian ...