100 days of fail

Liveblogging Barack Obama’s 100th Birthday

Hey friends welcome to the first (1st) part of the liveblog! If you’re joining us from “YouTube,” “aloha” to you. And a very special “Feliz Navidad” to our Barack Obama, who has been the President for 100 days at this point, today. Let’s hear his ...
  announcement of intent to liveblog

Tonight: Liveblogging, With Barack ’100′ Obama

Yes we can haz liveblogging, tonight, beginning when the excitement begins, which is 8PM Eastern and 5PM Western. Do you not have a teevee? Well good for you, but also THAT’S NO EXCUSE because this historic 100-years-war, which will be marked with a fireside chat from the White House ...
  announcement of intent to liveblog

QUESTION FOR YOU PEOPLE: Is there a way to watch the Obama press conference thingy tonight, LIVE, on a computer, but without upgrading Flash, which will fuck up our fragile publishing system? (Meaning, besides CNN.) NEVER MIND JUST FOUND THIS.
  we're all gonna die ... someday

LEVEL 5 FREAKOUT! WIDESPREAD HUMAN INFECTION

Do you know what’s worse than a LEVEL FOUR flu pandemic freakout? A LEVEL FIVE flu pandemic freakout — it is like four, but plus another, to equal five. Things can only get one more number worse than what will soon be announced, the Level 5 — and that, as you probably already ...
  republican revolution

BUDGET PASSES HOUSE, NO GOP VOTES: Surprise surprise, the Impotent Obstructionists voted en masse (that there’s a French socialist term) against the $3.44 trillion federal budget. Did you know they are against federal spending now? [CNN]
  republican revolution

California Marine Sick, Quarantine At Twentynine Palms Base

We don’t have our copy of The Stand handy, as we probably left it on a school bus or something, in the 1980s, but let’s see, Army dude sick with the Superbug, escapes a desert military base in California and infects the whole Southwest before he dies, does that sound about right? ...
  lolwut?

FEMA Censors Weird 9/11 Coloring Book, For Kids!

For god knows how many years, the evil shadow government FEMA had this weird terror-coloring booklet, for kids, available as a fun PDF download. Then, due to …. hmm, body bags? Domestic concentration camps? Formaldehyde trailers? Black Oil? Bees? Let’s say bees ….
  our flourishing economy

Happy Worst Recession In Half a Century Day!

It’s official for Sad America: As the economy shrunk another 6.1% in the first quarter of 2009, the total GDP loss for this recession (so far!) is 3.3%, making this the worst recession since the legendary “Elvis Downtown” of 1957-58. And there’s only one economic ...
  wonk'd

Emergency Wonk’d: Richmond Edition

Why, who’s that dashing young gent sitting up in a tree? Dr. Hunter Holmes McGuire, of course, the famous Civil War surgeon. Also spotted in Richmond: for the first time ever, somebody actually recognized your editors in public. We were leaving Amici and this perfectly nice-seeming, ...
  presidential porn

White House Photog Puts Everything On Flickr

Such fun, back in the day, when you could look at “Barack Obama’s Photostream” on the Flickr. But then, he became President, and suddenly no more fun pictures. Well, rejoice! White House photographer Pete Souza uploaded a whole bunch of great White House Official Pix, and you ...
  daily briefing

Language Is a Virus From Outer Space

“Patient Zero,” a five-year-old Mexican boy who got the H1N1 virus at the beginning of April and then recovered completely, has been found. God knows what the World Health Organization will do to him now — but chances are your pig/bird flu vaccine will have a little bit of ...
  the romance of diplomacy

Don’t Miss Hillary’s Duet With Nick Cave

They let Bono in the New York Times and Bob Dylan in the Pope’s castle and Beyonce in the President’s castle and Elton John into what’s her name’s funeral, so why not let Australian gloom singer Nick Cave into Hillary Clinton’s secret State Department lair? Oh ...
  do not want

Jonah ‘K-Lo’ Goldberg Having LA Affair With Itself?

“Weird news,” indeed. Christ! Can’t you people keep your foul third-rate romance/low-rent rendezvous off the freakin’ Internet, which really doesn’t need more pornography, and certainly not the kind you two would create. Ugh. Thanks, Sadly, No!, for the ...
  republicans for the win!

WELL THEN THAT’S IT, DOESN’T COUNT: “Specter condemned Jim Jeffords’ party switch in 2001.”[Los Angeles Times]
  drama on the hill

Capitol Scandal: With Whom Will Specter Lunch?

It’s going to be great, tomorrow, when we can all quit acting like we care about Arlen Specter beyond, you know, his vote. Meanwhile, OMG WITH WHOM WILL ARLEN SUP, AT THE SENATE DINING ROOM? Because you know he used to lunch with his Republican “colleagues,” but now he hates ...