Wonkette

Texas Rep. John Culberson is a jackass, and yesterday he wrote a letter to Secretary of State Hillary Clinton. He requested help with something, internationally. So what was his pressing concern for the nation’s top diplomat? MORE »

Strife among the Olds! The principal actor in this particular Olds Drama, as in all Olds Dramas, is the elderly peacebomber John McCain, who is something like 87 years old. Standing opposite John McCain is the corrupt League of Olds, the AARP. Once friends, now foes, after the AARP recently *ruined everything* by endorsing ObamaCare, the chief tenet of which — and you can read this for yourself in plain language, on any number of Internet sites — is to kill white women and children over 65 years old. John McCain is so furious about this endorsement that he plans to use his powers as the elected President of the United States to bomb the AARP, so as to liberate it. MORE »

Oh hey look it’s the new Thanksgiving video from song-and-dance entertainer Bob Dylan. Can you find the secret list of presidents in this holiday polka? And why does Santa/Dylan leave out our two greatest presidents, Barack Obama and George W. Bush Junior? [YouTube]

• MARK YOUR CALENDARS! Ooh, a book that might actually rival Going Rogue, in lies: “NEW YORK – Karl Rove’s memoir has a title, ‘Courage and Consequence,’ and a release date — March 9, 2010.” Well if there’s snappy alliteration in the title, we can’t not buy it. [AP]

Retarded pussy John Shadegg has apologized to Michael Bloomberg for saying, on the House floor, that Bloomberg’s daughter would be kidnapped by Muslim terrorists if another terrorist is given a criminal trial in a New York City court of law: “I apologize for the insensitivity of my remarks with respect to the Mayor or his family, however…” — here we go, the ominous “however” — “…I think it is important to note that this decision involves potential risk to innocent people.” From what we hear, Michael Bloomberg’s daugher ain’t so innocent, oh ho ho… ho ho… we’ll shutup now. [NYDN]

ATTN: Andrew Sullivan has postponed the Internet today. MORE »

“A MUST-READ ORGAN OF CONSERVATIVE OPINION”: this is how The Corner’s #1 accurate describer of things Rich Lowry characterizes Sarah Palin’s Facebook page, with those words right over there. The ones in caps. No, no, in black. The bold ones right above right here. There are like seven of them? Just keeping looking until you find them. [The Corner via Ben Smith]

Everyone very loudly but gently say “congratulations” to Sen. Robert Byrd, who became the longest-serving lawmaker in the history of Congress today. He’s like, “I look forward to serving you for the next 56 years and 320 days,” which is very gracious! Here’s this video of Robert Byrd playing the ancient instrument of “fiddle” back in the 1870s, when people would watch other people do “fiddle” on teevee for enjoyment. It’s like eight minutes long though, so just as with any old person thing, you can get away with turning it off after like 24 seconds and then saying that you love it. [HuffPost]

OBAMA IS THAT BRAGGY MACABRE GUY ON VACATION: “‘It’s magical,’ Mr. Obama said, walking down a ramp alone, his hands in his pockets. ‘It reminds you of the sweep of history and our time here on earth is not that long. We better make the best of it.’” [WSJ]

Oh good morning. Sleeping, we were? Perhaps spending time with family and friends? Those things do NOT sound like “thinking about Sarah Palin,” which means that for many of you, it has been two, even three hours since you have thought about Sarah Palin. Ha, hey look someone made a Going Rogue index and then uploaded it next to some JPGs of soldiers and cowboys! Well done. Since this same person also embedded a song terrible beyond all comprehension on the website, here are the interesting—Mick Jagger! “Issac,” the protagonist of Stephenie Meyer’s Bible series! Stapleton!—index terms, aggregated right here on your silent Wonkette. MORE »

• A lot of gynecologists and other lady and/or oncological doctors disagree completely with yesterday’s new things about mammography announcement. [New York Times]
• Obama admitted that Gitmo is not going to close by January. This makes keeping his promise to close Gitmo by January a considerably tenuous one. [Washington Post]
• Between fraud and anything having to do with Recovery.gov and cleverer types of fraud, the federal government managed to accidentally overpay $98 billion dollars last fiscal year. [CNN]
• The Somali pirates are like obsessed with this one US-flagged cargo ship, which they just attacked for the second time in seven months. Creepy. [AP]
• Obama’s admiration of the Great Wall of China can be seen from space. [WSJ]
• Meet Vaira Vike-Freiberga. Alias: VVF. Pedigree: Twice former president of Latvia. She is this lady running for president of Europe and she is so dope—read all of this: [Times Online]