Just Look At All The Puppies He *Didn't* Kick

Only 2000 Women Sued Georgia GOP Senate Candidate For Discrimination. Seems Low.

Michelle Nunn has a pretty good 'You gotta be freakin kidding me' face
David Perdue would really like to be Georgia’s next U.S. Senator, but it seems he has a few problems with the ladies, as in he is polling really badly with them, compared to opponent Michelle Nunn. For a state with no Democrats in statewide offices, Georgia is very, very close to sending ...
  Infectious Unease Vectors

Left-Wing Nurse Knows Too Much About Ebola To Have Opinions About Ebola

How odd that a volunteer for Doctors Without Borders isn't a Republican
Since Barack Obama stubbornly insists on listening to public health experts instead of Fox News, it’s become quite clear that wingnuts’ favored non-solution, a ban on travel from West Africa, isn’t going to happen. Happily, a few governors figured out that even if they ...
  Your Morning Maddow

Rachel Maddow Interviews America’s First Ebola Political Prisoner (Video)

Get ready to be angry, kids. Monday night, Rachel Maddow interviewed Ryan Boyko, a Yale PhD student in Public Health, who is one of about eight people put on quarantine by order of Connecticut Gov. Dannel P. Malloy. Not because Boyko has Ebola, and not because he has Ebola symptoms, and not ...
  you don't say

Oops! House Republicans Forgot To Sue Obama For Presidenting

Which one is Boehner?
If you are anything like us, you have recently been wondering what happened to the plan by the House’s Rabid Ferret Caucus to sue the bejesus out of President Obama for moving around some deadlines to implement parts of the Affordable Care Act. (And if you are like us and have been wondering ...
  Here have some news n stuff

You Know Who Else Worked With The Nazis? America, That’s Who.

Which one's the moderate?
Here’s a nifty little tale about that time the United States government worked with Nazis — actual Nazis, not the hyperbolic “Obama is just like Hitler” kind. In the decades after World War II, the C.I.A. and other United States agencies employed at least a thousand ...
  Die For Your Own Sins Taker

Pat Robertson: Jesus Wants You To Invest In Oil, Not Abortion Pills

Have you heard the good word about blood diamonds?
So let’s say you find some extra coin under the sofa cushion, and you’re thinking, “I should invest this and become a billionaire!” Good plan, you, because that’s how it works in America, as long as you’re wearing the right bootstraps. So whom should you call ...
  Nuke The Healthcare Workers From Orbit. It's The Only Way To Be Sure

Chris Christie Wants To Play Doctor With Nurse Lady, Mostly By Yelling At Her

Thank goodness you can't get Ebola from spittle
With no teachers immediately available to yell at, New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie has taken up yelling at nurses, we guess. In the latest twist on Chris Christie’s War On Health Care Workers Who Volunteer To Fight Deadly Diseases, the New Jersey Department of Health announced this morning ...
  i love you man

Oh Hey, Paul Rudd Was One Of The Dallas Airport Homophobe Heroes (No He Wasn’t)

Updated and totally recanted below! WONKET EXCLUSIVE MUST CREDIT WONKetTE! So you all saw the video, today or alllll the way back on Saturday, of a bunch of Dallas airport heroes tackling the fuck out of that violent homophobe guy. But you DID NOT know one of the heroes was Paul Rudd, because ...
  E. Coli Now Smarter Than Creationists!

Michigan State University Gets To Learn Why Darwin Did The Holocaust

Actually, we might go to this conference...
Thanks to some help from a campus student group, Michigan State University’s campus in East Lansing gets to host a great big Creationism conference, not that the university itself is particularly excited about the prospect of bringing in a bunch of goofballs to argue that Darwin = Hitler. ...
  sext machine

National Review Online Really Wants To Read Eric Holder Word-Sexing His Wife

Eric Holder, who is kind of a jerk sometimes and is pretty great other times, is in some sort of lawsuit or something because Fast & Furious Ebolagate Solyndraghazi. But did you know he has claimed he shouldn’t have to turn over in discovery some emails he sent to his wife? National ...
  Well in that case the answer is still no

Scott Brown Finds One Lady Who Will Vouch For Him (His Wife)

At least she sort of likes him
Scott Brown might not have found a winning message with the lady voters of New Hampshire yet, but there’s at least one woman who thinks he’s not bad: Mrs. Scott Brown. Tell us why he’s so THE BEST, won’t you, Gail? Scott is such a warm and sensitive and incredibly ...
  Wow So Shooty Much Tradition

NRA Protects Pennsylvania’s Right To Eat Dogs

If you eat me now, do it quick, so that the meat does not become tough
Hooray, Pennsylvania state Senate! You came close to doing a solid for our animal friends — you passed a bill that would result in a prison sentence for anyone who “[breeds,] keeps, sells, offers for sale or transfers a dog or cat for the purpose of human consumption.” Good on ya! ...
  Red Dawn II: How Tiresome

Is Putin Spreading Ebola? Sure Why Not

With Ebola now killing 0.000001% of Americans who might have otherwise died naturally from self-inflicted gunshot wounds, diabetes, car accidents or no-knock, wrong-condo SWAT raids, The Washington Post has bravely asked what you are already thinking deep within your sub-subconscious: ...
  Ook?

John Oliver, Jane Goodall and Poo-Thrower Hitler (Video!)

Two primates interact in a simple food-sharing ritual
Here’s John Oliver interviewing Dr. Jane Goodall as part of Last Week Tonight’s ongoing series, “People Who Think Good.” Turns out that chimpanzees are a lot like people, making tools, having wars, and being all-around arseholes. They also make terrible pets — ...
  senioritis

Scott Walker Gets Some Chris Christie All Over Him, On Purpose

With a little over a week to go before Election Day, Scott Walker is increasingly a man in need of a helping hand. His once-certain re-election as King of Wisconsin has taken up residence in every pollster’s “no idea, don’t ask us” box, the U.S. Supreme Court cruelly ...
  Here have some news n stuff

If We Could Quarantine Stupid, New Jersey Wouldn’t Have A Governor

Dr. Chris Christie (R-Asshole)
When it comes to Ebola, there’s what the experts say — no, travel bans won’t work; no, we should not quarantine everyone who sneezes on a subway; no, you can’t get Ebola by looking at a picture of President Obama — and then there are the politicians who don’t ...
  The Marx of the Beast

Sundays With The Christianists: Homos And Demons And Marx, Oh My!

Why is there a union jack on the skull? Your guess is as good as any. Let's say it represent Marx's London years.
Here we are at Part 3 of our dive into Apostate: The Men Who Destroyed the Christian West, by Kevin Swanson, the radio preacher who likes to warn that the Pill leaves women’s wombs chock full of tiny dead babies, like some kind of horrifying death-muffin, and that his home state of ...
  We Watch So You Don't Have To

The Sarah Palin Fartknocker Report: Climate Change Is This Century’s Eugenics

The Sarah Palin Fartknocker Report, Presented by Fartknocker
Sarah Palin is a busy former half-term governor these days. She’s hit the campaign trail for Republicans no one really likes; she “wrote” a Facespace note telling us how she had a big sad about the Thrilla in Wasilla; and four days ago, she went foraging for derp berries in ...
  It’s only nepotism when Democrats do it

Spawn Of Irving Kristol Sick Of Democrats Who Pretend To Make It On Their Own

Son of a derp
Mouth-breathing uber-moron Bill Kristol came from nothing, absolutely nothing, to pull himself up by his own diapers and build his illustrious career as one of the most prominent Being Wrong About Everything Ever Always columnists in history. Which is why he feels completely vindicated in ...
  the commentczar's in town

Deleted Comments of the Week: We Need To Worry About Guns Because ‘White Is Almost A Minority’

To be fair, Rarity's computer would surely use a nicer font than Courier
Another Saturday, another trip to the comments queue! We never know what sort of detritus we’re going to fish out, but we can always guarantee that it would benefit from a few passes with a high-pressure steam hose. This week, we don’t seem to have any overwhelming theme, just a ...
  In Case You Missed it

Your Wonkette Week In Review: Good Stuff You Should Have Read But Didn’t. What’s Wrong With You?

We live in an age of diminished comics
It’s the week-end, and time for all of us to rest from our labours (in theory, at least) and devote our time to pursuing leisure, sport and recreation, huzzah! Or at least catch up on the Wonkette stories you may have missed during the week. And to help, here are the ten best, at least as ...
  The perfect Halloween treat

These Candy Corn Jell-o Shots Will Feed Your Sweet Tooth, With Booze

We are eating Candy Corn Jell-O Shots for Halloween. Coconut, orange, and pineapple gelatin with vodka — party in the test kitchen! The best part about this recipe is that is doesn’t taste like a Candy Corn at all. Remember nibbling off the white tip, biting into orange, and feeling ...