So we want to applaud folks like Senator Kirsten Gillibrand (D-NY) who are fighting the good fight to stop all the sexual assaulting in our military. What’s the big deal, though? Can chicks just not handle a little afternoon raping? Don’t they know that boys will be boys, and that boobs wouldn’t be groped if God had not made boobs so perky and grope-able? Totally the Big Guy’s fault.
Well, at least the military is having more training about sexual assault, and it’s not like the Army top sexual assault prosecutor would go to a training on sexual assault and grope a lady, because that would be ALL THE FUCKED UP, KATIE. Per Stars and Stripes:
The top Army prosecutor for sexual assault cases has been suspended after a lawyer who worked for him recently reported he’d groped her and tried to kiss her at a sexual-assault legal conference more than two years ago.
For serious, Army? Of all the people you have to choose from to deal with this issue, how come you can’t find someone who will at least wait until the sexual assault legal conference is over before sexually assaulting a woman? Allegedly. READ MORE »
Look, we are also VERY SAD when a prominent Dem does — or is accused of doing — something wrong, but we have to write about it, you know, we really do. And damn, we would really love it if the domestic violence accusation against Alan Grayson turned out to be nothing but overheated vapor in an ugly divorce. Lord knows there’s never a shortage of false or exaggerated claims in custody disputes — then again, there’s never a shortage of actual abuse, either.
So very many of you tipped and emailed and tweetered us this new development: a cell phone video of part of Saturday’s confrontation between Alan Grayson and his wife Lolita, taken by Grayson aide Juan Lopez, who Grayson says came along in case there was trouble. Alan Grayson’s lawyer Mark NeJame says the video shows Lolita Grayson delivering a “right uppercut” to the congressman’s head; we’d call it a slap or maybe a push, but OK. After the jump, we shall look more closely at the video and get all Kevin-Costner Zapruder Film-y on it. Note how Mr. Grayson steps back, and to the…um, to the right. READ MORE »
You know how on “Law and Order SVU” they always take a rape kit at the hospital immediately following the assault and then like magic it gets run through a giant database and spits out the DNA of the rapist? Yeah, that does not happen, people. In real life, that rape kit gets taken and stuffed in a lab somewhere, joining a giant slew of untested kits. Joe Biden aims to change that because Joe Biden is the best.
Vice President Joe Biden proposed $35 million in grant funding on Wednesday afternoon to help clear the hundreds of thousands of backlogged rape kits off the shelves of police stations and labs.
Biden, who has made countering domestic abuse and sexual assault a cornerstone of his political career, told reporters that testing the backlogged kits helps police track down serial rapists, which provides “the ultimate closure for a woman.”
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Sure, Bill O’Reilly has gotten some flack for asking whether a lady like Hillary Clinton has the cojones to be president. It’s bad enough that we have a president who wears mom jeans; why would we want an actual mom? Happily, Stephen Colbert has Papa Bear’s big hairy back — though not with a loofah. O’Reilly recently posited that there just has to be a “downside to having a woman president, something…something that may not fit with that office.”
You might think the discussion would have just ended with Fox’s Kirsten Powers simply saying, “Hmm, I’m gonna say no, Bill,” but there you go, thinking when Bill O’Reilly is in the room. Thankfully, Stephen has the real nitty gritty kitty ditty on this lady president thing, and why the world is just not ready for a lady leader, just like it wasn’t ready for Golda Meier or Margaret Thatcher.
There are few more depressing experiences than hearing a friend rationalize the violent behavior of an abusive boyfriend. (Yes, we know girlfriends can be physically abusive too, sometimes, like 10 percent of the time, but we are not talking about that now so shut up and let us tell our story. Geez!) “I just make him so angry sometimes…he’s under a lot of stress right now…I hit him first…”
So we were Sad when we read World Net Daily’s Exclusive Scoop about how nobody understands their man crush Vladimir Putin, and nuh uh, he hasn’t done ANYTHING wrong, GOD, you people, JUST LEAVE HIM ALONE!!!!
Using the mutant superpower of reading Russia Today, journamalist F. Michael Maloof performed a masterful gotcha! on the world’s lamestream media, its diplomatic corps, its international treaty organizations and all sentient beings in the universe not named Vladimir Putin nor directly employed by him. Maloof (the F stands for FFS) notes that aha! Russia already had troops stationed in Crimea under its post-Soviet treaty with Ukraine, so there is no invasion, nothing to see here at all, move along. READ MORE »
Here’s a Nice Time change from our usual school lunch story — instead of a tale of heartless dickery leading to poor kids’ food being thrown away, this time around we have a tale where the good guys win and hungry kids get fed! Could this become a trend? Yes, we do need to pause for just a minute to note that it should not even be news that hungry kids will now be fed. In any case, paper hats and hairnets off to the Maine Legislature for voting to override Gov. Paul LePage’s veto of a bill expanding a summer school lunch program. See, state legislatures? That’s what you do when your governor is a jerk who says that children should not eat food. Why can’t more of you be like the good boys and girls in Maine? READ MORE »
Chancellor Angela Merkel of Germany told Mr. Obama by telephone on Sunday that after speaking with Mr. Putin she was not sure he was in touch with reality, people briefed on the call said. “In another world,” she said.
-The New York Times, March 3
Greetings, decadent Western scum! It is I, Vladimir Putin, returned once again to grace the pages of your Wonkette. It has been many months since last we spoke with each other, for which I wish to apologize. We have been very busy here in Mother Russia, with the making of the Olympics and the rapacious extraction of every last natural resource from our land and the repression of dissidents and the invading of other countries. But you have been busy also, making with the jokes of Ted Cruz and John Boehner and how they are dicks, so that is very nice too. I, Vladimir Putin, wish to commend you on your funny making! Many times your Wonkette, it is funny and I laugh. Ha. Ha. READ MORE »
Remember the Golden Era of Lyndon LaRouche circa the mid-1980s where you couldn’t go anywhere without getting accosted by the LaRouche people sporting that weird shiny glimmer in the eye that is the sign of a true believer zealot? Do you miss them now that there are only random pockets of LaRouchiness happening in the world? Don’t be sad! If you mosey on down to Texas, you can get a full-on dose of LaRouche from Kesha Rogers, who is running for John Cornyn’s seat as a Democrat and managed to pull enough votes to force a runoff in the primary.
Kesha Rogers expects her Senate platform of impeaching President Barack Obama and repealing Obamacare to carry her to victory in the Texas Democratic primary — and said that Obama’s support for “Nazis in Ukraine” makes him like Hitler.
Rogers, an acolyte of the cultish fringe political icon Lyndon LaRouche, was able to make it to the runoff in the Democratic primary for Sen. John Cornyn’s (R-TX) seat with 21.7 percent of the vote in Tuesday’s primary. She now faces dentist David Alameel to get the nomination and face Cornyn. Democrats, fearing Rogers as the Democratic nominee, have actively worked try and stop her from making it past the primary.
She sounds like she has a great grasp of foreign AND domestic policy!
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Here’s a huge surprise: Sarah Palin is nauseated and disgusted that Barack Obama is “Palling Around with [a] Cop-Killer Advocate” who she can’t even name, because the nominee she’s referring to, Debo Adegbile, is just too disgusting and horrifying to even mention, and is also quite blackity-blackblackblack, but that is definitely not the issue here, because only black people play the race card. Says Sarah (or her ghostwriter? This sounds mean enough to be the real deal):
You know evil reigns when America’s “leader” gives full-throated support for a cop-killer advocate. Obama wants this guy to help run the Department of Justice.
Now, what is a “cop-killer advocate?” It’s clearly someone who advocates killing cops, right? Which is exactly what you are advocating if you helped in any way with defending a cop killer. As we’ve already noted today, Adegbile’s advocacy of cop-killing consisted of helping to file a brief in one of Mumia Abu-Jamal’s appeals, which for almost-Vice-President Palin is pretty much the same as shooting cops himself. READ MORE »
Over at Happy Nice Time today, we’ll teach you to make awesome fried fish because Lent, help you avoid seeing Pompeii at all costs, show you how “Agents of SHIELD” is getting better but that doesn’t yet mean good, plus a whole mess of stuff we linked over here already, and, of course, Sideboob.
How’s about a round of applause for Arizona state Sen. Steve Gallardo, who was moved by the recent excitement over the state’s discrimination-is-awesome bill to come out as gay today.
“I am gay, I am Latino and I’m a state senator,” Gallardo said, explaining that the fight over SB 1062 had been a “game-changer” in deciding to come out. A slightly cynical person might also note that since he announced last week that he was running for the U.S. congressional seat being vacated by retiring Rep. Ed Pastor, Gallardo probably decided it was far better to come out himself than let an opposition researcher leak the news, but we are nowhere near that jaded, we really are not. Now pass us that postcard of Dorothy Parker playing whist with H.L. Mencken, please. READ MORE »
So let’s say you are a skirt-wearing person and you would like to ride public transportation in Massachusetts. You would likely think that if someone tried to take an upskirt picture of your lacy underthings or junk swinging free or whatever you have under there, that would be illegal. Haha you are wrong.
The Supreme Judicial Court today tossed charges against a Green Line rider caught snapping photos up the skirts of female Green Line riders in 2010.
In its ruling, the state’s highest court said the law used to prosecute Michael Robertson applies only to “nude” or “partially nude” women in private locations, such as bedrooms, not to clothed women – even women with no undergarments – in public places such as the T.
You are probably saying WAIT WHAT but sadly the Court is right here, even though the result sucks balls.
Would it be safe to characterize the Wall Street Journal as something other than a bastion of liberal rhetoric? We think that is probably a safe call, right? (Especially since it was made by Yr Editrix in the chatcave.) So let us just note that the Wall Street Journal, no bastion of liberal rhetoric, credits Obamacare with three-fourths of the rise in U.S. incomes this year. WSJ’s Jeffrey Sparshott escaped from being a bosun’s mate in a C.S. Forrester novel long enough to inform us that
the law’s expanded coverage boosted Medicaid benefits by an estimated $19.2 billion, according to Commerce’s Bureau of Economic Analysis. The ACA also offered several refundable tax credits, including health insurance premium subsidies, which added up to $14.7 billion.
Taken together, the Obamacare provisions are responsible for about three-quarters of January’s overall rise in Americans’ incomes.
We’re pretty sure that’s what you’d have to call a pretty big effin’ deal READ MORE »