America’s favorite fake Indian, Senator Perfesser Lizbeth Warren, has written a new booky wook, squeeeeeeee, aaaaaah, ARE YOU GOING TO BUY IT, I KNOW ME TOO!! The book is called A Fighting Chance (buy it here, we get money), and the Boston Globe and The New Yorker already have reviews up if you want to read them. But will the Globe and the New Yorker join you in freaking out about this, oh my god it’s going to be so good? They will not, so we will now blockquote at you:
On her first day on the job, [former Treasury Secretary Tim] Geithner — who Warren often disagreed with — took her out to lunch. When she showed up at his office, he presented her with a present: a cop’s hat.
Then they got into the back seat of an SUV that was driven by a security detail. Warren put her seat belt on; Geithner didn’t.
“Like a bossy third-grade teacher, I looked at him and said, ‘Put on your seat belt, Mr. Secretary,’ ” Warren writes. “Like a naughty kid, he looked back and said, ‘I don’t have to.’ ”
SASS FACTOR OF TEN, MADAM SENIOR SENATOR OF MASSACHUSETTS. We look forward to reading the slash fic in which Geithner and Lizzy Dubs just totally do it, right there in the SUV, with the Secret Service watching and everything. (We are not good at writing slash fic.) But also, Geithner “presented her with a present”? Unacceptable, especially when there’s a perfectly good thesaurus available to all Microsoft Encarta users.
That’s enough copyediting snark for today. Do you want more ambiguously sexual dialogue to snicker at?
“You’re jamming me, Elizabeth,” Obama said.
YEAH YOU ARE, SENATOR SEXYTIMES.
“He urged me not to overplay my hand,’’ she writes. “Got it.’’
Let it build…let it build… READ MORE »