Wonkette

Our story this morning about the bloviations of Redd Foxx comedy sketch escapee Abdul-Hakim Shabazz and his brilliantly satirical attempts to bum money off panhandlers got noticed by Mr. Shabazz himself, who must spend a fair amount of each day self-googling. Careful you don’t go blind, Mr. Shabazz! He dropped an attempted comment in the […]

Last time we checked in with the Koch brothers’ frathouse spinoff Generation Opportunity, they were attempting to convince DC’s underemployed youth to shun ObamaCare by drowning them in rail drinks and cheap sunglasses. Now that it’s summertime, like everyone else they want to be outside having fun instead of in some dank basement bar, so […]

An Iowa newspaper editor who was fired after blogging about how The Gays are going to hell and taking America with them is now suing his former newspaper, claiming that he’s a victim of religious discrimination. Let’s all pour one out for poor oppressed Bob Eschliman, the former editor of the Newton Daily News, who […]

Last night’s Daily Show brings us George Takei, who’s gone from pretend starship helmsman to real-life human rights hero and kept an excellent outlook on everything, somehow. Takei is on a press tour for his autobiographical documentary, To Be Takei, and instead of the usual interview fodder — his career on the popular “Star Wars” […]

It’s baaaaaaaaack. Just as we were all beginning to forget that terrible, TERRIBLE Twilight-inspired tripe called Fifty Shades of Grey — do not even get me started on how 50 kinds of sad it is that E.L. James enjoyed Twilight so much, she wrote her very own fan-fic trilogy, which is basically the same story except […]

#451607616 / gettyimages.com You may have noticed that, apart from the supremely idiotic thoughts of the people who got America into Iraq in the first place, we haven’t been covering the terrible situation in that country much, because there is absolutely zero that’s funny about it. And there’s even less to laugh at in this […]

Here’s a story that easily could have turned out awful but is ultimately nice time, though not for lack of trying! Near Grimes, Iowa, two Polk County deputies successfully stopped a car that had been weaving all over the road, but while trying to get to the driver, who was incapacitated due to a medical […]

Polish up your resumes, Wonketeers, because it looks like the great state of Arizona will soon be in the market for a new press flack! After the AP and the Washington Post reported that the botched execution of convicted murderer Joseph R. Wood III was punctuated by nearly two hours of snorting and gasping, the […]

Oh man, aren’t poor people the worst? Like, there you are, “working and playing” in … Indianapolis, sure, why not, just go with it. You are just trying to enjoy a “meal, cigar,” and some dirty homeless waif comes up and is like “waaah, good sir, I am so hungry, can you spare a ducat?” […]

The DC Circuit Court’s ruling on the ACA Tuesday was, according to everyone on cable, “a major blow to Obamacare,” as Jon Stewart dutifully notes with clips of a slew of cable news people saying it was a huge, catastrophic, major deadly blow. As you recall, the appeals court insisted that a bit of sloppiness […]

Blind item! Gossipy thing! Drudge siren! Which blatantly coupled-up DC “journalist” guy (just kidding about the “journalist” part) is going around hitting on DC women, and then standing them up? We wonder if you will ever be able to guess. Our source, a well-educated lady employed by one of the District’s fine institutions of higher […]

It is strange goddamn times we live in when Dana Rohrabacher says something astoundingly, head-smackingly dumb and it’s still barely in the top fifty of dumb things we’ve heard this week. Nonetheless and also such as, this is pretty dumb. Republican Congressman Dana Rohrabacher, a frequent foe of Google, is demanding to know why the giant […]

Look, would all you lamepants lamers in the lamestream media just stop obsessing about that dumb plane with the Dutchmen on it, and those dumb brown children, and pay attention to something important, like whether Michele Bachmann will run for president again on her popular “What About Me?” platform. Real Clear Politics actually asked old […]

A group of Constitution-loving patriots from Come And Take It Dallas — not the more familiar Open Carry Texas — gathered in Dallas’s Dealey Plaza, near the grassy knoll, on July 19 (the narrator keeps saying it’s “June 19,” but it’s July) to celebrate the Second Amendment and to grouse about foreigners, who are foreign […]

Scott Brown, that pretty fella who used to be Massachusetts’s junior senator till he got his ass war-whooped by one Mrs. Perfesser Elizabeth Warren, has some thoughts on that terrible Halbig decision yesterday, the one by the DC Court of Appeals that said “why yes, Republican governors may singlehandedly fuck Obamacare, right in the ear,” […]