Sportsball

Sally Field Will Be Adam Rippon’s Mother-In-Law If It’s The Last Damn Thing She Does

If her son is being a pill about this, Sally Field is free to Adopt A Wonkette and set us up with whomever she'd like.

Here Is Adam Rippon SING-SKATING To Rihanna, Because Of Course He Is

Oh look at me, I'm Adam Rippon, I'm good at stuff.

There Is Another Gay One In The Olympics And He Says Trump And Pence Can Eat Yellow Snow Too

Meet Gus Kenworthy! He is your favorite, just like Adam Rippon is your favorite.

Why Did Mike Pence Go All The Way To The Olympics To Embarrass America When He Can Just Do That At Home?

It's a pity Mike Pence went to the Olympics in the first place.

Did Russia Hack Adam Rippon’s Score In Free Skate Last Night, Like A Common Wisconsin?

Are the Olympic judges fucking kidding right now?

Fox News Non-Racist Would Like To Know Who Let All These Gaywads And Blacks Into His Olympics

He is SO MAD that ... 20 of the 243 American athletes are black or Asian and two are gay. And NOT because that's too few.

Badass Gay Figure Skater ‘Bout To Land Perfect Triple Axel UP MIKE PENCE’S ASS

Openly gay US figure skater Adam Rippon is having NONE. OF. MIKE. PENCE'S. SHIT.

Peggy Noonan Observed Last Evening’s Footballing Match!

It was a very good footballing match.

Martin Luther King Had A Dream: Of Great Big Powerful Pickup Trucks!

Corporate America gets Black History Month started with a facepalm.

Vince McMahon Is Here To Save Football For Hetero Patriots And White Jesus

Let's bring back the XFL, because it was so AWESOME the first time!

Gymnast-Molesting Doctor Thinks It Is Very Rude Of Judge To Make Him Listen To His Victims

Oh the poor, delicate flower... who molested and raped more than 140 girls and owned piles of child pornography.

Trump Stands For National Anthem Like True Patriot, Remembers At Least Nine Words Of It ALMOST PERFECTLY

Did Donald Trump forget the words to the national anthem of the country he is president of again? WE REPORT, YOU DECIDE!

Racist Pizza Guy To Spend More Time Thinking About What He’s Done

We are sure he will be very happy spending time with his money!