Sportsball

Papa John’s Guy Sad That NFL Players Care More About Police Brutality Than His Pizza Sales

Apparently there is a lot of crossover between people who love police brutality and also love shitty pizza.

The GOP Civil War Is ON! Wonkagenda for Thursday, Oct. 26, 2017

The GOP has a cat fight, Rexxon is ruining the world, and Lou Dobbs blows Trump on national television. Your morning news brief.

ROY MOORE NOT GONNA LET YOU FOOSBALL MENS BREAK FLAG LAW!

Disgraced former Alabama Supreme Court idiot Roy Moore has thoughts on the 'rule of law.' Stop giggling, you.

Wait, Did Bill O’Reilly Just Ruin Cute Animals?

We bet you thought you already hated Bill O'Reilly as much as it was possible for you to hate Bill O'Reilly

Trump Amputates Healthcare For Poors. Wonkagenda For Fri., Oct. 13, 2017

Trump breaks healthcare, Ryan Zinke flies his own freaky corrupt flag, and Wilbur Ross will shove Trump Tax Cuts (For Rich People Only) down your throat. Your morning news brief.

Trump Thinks Puerto Rico Has Been Mollycoddled Enough. Wonkagenda For Thurs., Oct 12, 2017

Shit in Puerto Rico gets serious, Rose McGowan suspended from Twitter for being worse than nazis we guess, and Hannity is blowing Trump on national TV. Your morning news brief!

Kissinger Advises Trump: Do Illegal Immediately. Wonkagenda for Wed., Oct 11. 2017

Trump talks with Kissinger, REXXON's 'fucking moron' gets worse, and Mike Ditka is a fucking idiot. Your BIG morning news brief!

ESPN Just Wishes Jemele Hill Would Stop Making Trump And The Football Owners SO MAD!

Has Trump not heard about this whole cord-cutting thing?

Mike Pence Faked A Rage-Gasm At A Football Game? Cool Story Bro.

Are we supposed to be impressed?

Trump Pisses Off Puerto Rico. Wonkagenda for Oct. 4, 2017

Trump pissed off Puerto Rico, REXXON is mouthing off, and Megyn Kelly LOVES the NRA. Your morning news brief.

Don’t Come Around Here No More. Wonkagenda For Tues., Oct. 3, 2017

Your morning news brief will talk about everything, and is not changing the subject.

LAS VEGAS HORROR. Wonkagenda For Mon., Oct. 2, 2017

If we cover another story today, it'll probably be Puerto Rico. Otherwise, here are some things that *would* have been news today. Your morning news brief!

Black NFL Quarterback Doing Sweetest Acts Of Kindness Probably Scary As HELL To Donald Trump

Deshaun Watson of the Houston Texans seems like a really swell guy!

Trump Reckons NFL Owners Are Pussies Scared Of Big Black Dudes, Just Like Him!

This isn't a dogwhistle. This is a fucking BRASS BAND PLAYING SONGS ABOUT RACISM.

6 Out Of 10 Football Fans Agree: Donald Trump Should Go Munch AstroTurf

Uh oh, Donald Trump sucking ass in polls again!

Will This Nice White Baskets Coach Man Be Able To Explain White Privilege To Trump? Ha Ha, No

It would be pretty awesome, I am thinking, if Gregg Popovich, who is a very smart and astute man, were able to coach Donald Trump into understanding these things.