One's a rubber-faced novelty item that became a fad for no good reason. The other's a doll.

Deleted Comments: Attack Of Multi-Troll Almost Distracted Us From Arizona Legislator’s Furry Saga

Is our trolls learning? Probably not. But hey, how about this rightwing Arizona lady who came to appreciate furries?

The Redistribution Of Human Flesh, By Ross Douthbag

If we guarantee a right to sex for 'incels', shouldn't we also guarantee a right to human flesh for cannibals?

NBC Women Say They Were Pressured To Sign ‘Tom Brokaw Is Not A Sex Creep’ Letter No One Is Buying Anyway

Megyn Kelly is refusing to sign the letter, so now we have to give Megyn Kelly credit again for a thing.

Charlie Rose Planning ‘Me Too’ Chat Series From POV Of The Dicks

They're ready for their redemption arc, Mr. DeMille.

Sexxxy Emmanuel Macron Snuggles Donald Trump So Melania And America Don’t Have To

Yay, Donald's dashing boyfriend is in town!

PRETTY SURE Trump Was In Moscow Long Enough For Dinner And A Pee Show

Is this the stupidest lie Trump has ever told? MAYBE!

And Now For The Michael Cohen/Stormy Daniels/Michael Avenatti Porn Report!

We would watch that, we are just saying.

Deleted Comments: Robot Sex Dolls Awesome, Because No Child Support, No Nagging, No Feminism!

Sexbots need 20 InCel batteries (not included). But do they have enough Artificial Stupidity to win over Men Going Their Own Way?

Pervert Governor Eric Greitens Tells Missouri GOP To Come And Take It

Couldn't happen to a nicer political party!
But it really looks like Tom Brady

Thug Who Accosted Stormy Daniels Also Stole Tom Brady’s Face

And that's just rude!
How am I supposed to be a good person with that nickname?

Michael Cohen: I AM NOT A CROOK!

We'll presume Cohen's tapes have far fewer anti-Semitic rants. Probably.

Big News Day For Tucker Carlson, Obvs

Pandas might kill us all. Cell phones, too. Tucker Carlson has seen some shit, man.

Donald Trump Having A VERY Bad Day. Wonkagenda For Tues., April 10, 2018