Science

This Tale Of A Snail Finding Another Snail To Fuck Then Promptly Dying Will Warm Your Black Heart

We are not writing one more political post today and you can't make us.

Wait, Did Bill O’Reilly Just Ruin Cute Animals?

We bet you thought you already hated Bill O'Reilly as much as it was possible for you to hate Bill O'Reilly

Trump Declares War On GOP For Jesus. Wonkagenda For Mon., Oct. 16, 2017

Trump brings back Christmas, Bannon goes to war, Trump can't wait to 'You're Fired' SCOTUS Democrats. Your morning news brief.

Congressman Chris Collins: The Bitch Set Me Up!

Congressman Pharma Bro has a stock to pitch! YOU CAN'T LOSE! BUY NOW!

Trump Amputates Healthcare For Poors. Wonkagenda For Fri., Oct. 13, 2017

Trump breaks healthcare, Ryan Zinke flies his own freaky corrupt flag, and Wilbur Ross will shove Trump Tax Cuts (For Rich People Only) down your throat. Your morning news brief.

Trump Thinks Puerto Rico Has Been Mollycoddled Enough. Wonkagenda For Thurs., Oct 12, 2017

Shit in Puerto Rico gets serious, Rose McGowan suspended from Twitter for being worse than nazis we guess, and Hannity is blowing Trump on national TV. Your morning news brief!

Puerto Rico: Let Them Eat Debt!

Republicans COULD help Puerto Rico! But WILL they? (Spoiler Alert: NOPE.)

Kissinger Advises Trump: Do Illegal Immediately. Wonkagenda for Wed., Oct 11. 2017

Trump talks with Kissinger, REXXON's 'fucking moron' gets worse, and Mike Ditka is a fucking idiot. Your BIG morning news brief!
It's not even the rust that'll get you, though

Michigan’s Top Medical Official Charged With Poison-Watering People To Death, IS STILL TOP MEDICAL OFFICIAL

Dr. Eden Wells was pretty unhelpful when she threatened to take away Flint's public health money if they kept investigating the outbreak of Legionnaires' Disease she knew about!

White House Tries To Distract Trump. Wonkagenda For Tues., Oct. 10, 2017

Trump is ready to explode, California's burning to the sea, and ESPN shits the bed (again). Your morning news brief.
Do we really need an 'environment' anyway?

Trump EPA Will Make You Eat Coal, And You Will Like It

Look, no one's actually USING the atmosphere, are they?

Wah Trump Is The Real Hurricane Victim, Waaaah. Wonkagenda For Mon., Oct. 9, 2017

FEMA loses the plot. How's about Congressman Blackwater, Wyoming? And Mike Pence fakes it. Your morning news brief.

Trump Mindlessly Threatens WWIII (AGAIN). Wonkagenda For Fri., Oct. 6, 2017

Trump personally fucking with ACA, John Kelly got hacked, and you'll never guess that Breitbart's all-Nazi and Buzzfeed has the goods! Your morning news brief!

Trump Pisses Off Puerto Rico. Wonkagenda for Oct. 4, 2017

Trump pissed off Puerto Rico, REXXON is mouthing off, and Megyn Kelly LOVES the NRA. Your morning news brief.

A Fun End Of Day Post With Only A LITTLE Murder!

What evil lurks in the hearts of lawyers? These Jones Day dudes specifically. Your OPEN THREAD!

Don’t Come Around Here No More. Wonkagenda For Tues., Oct. 3, 2017

Your morning news brief will talk about everything, and is not changing the subject.