News

Definite Non-Nazi Trump Aide Sebastian Gorka Definitely Didn’t Make Up His Fake Doctorate Too

DOCTOR GORKA does not have time for you haters! He is busy doing...something important!

These Senators Are Totally Obsessed With How Many Old Gays Are At Brunch

Surprise, this is a story about how the Trump administration sucks again.

Nice ‘Alt-Right’ Couple Went To Milo Protest To Attack ‘Snowflakes,’ Shot One

Nothing like a night of the ol' ultraviolence for today's modern 'alt-right' couples.

Donald Trump Thought Presidenting Would Be Easy As Grabbing This Pussy

REALLY? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING US RIGHT NOW? FOR REAL?

Dear North Korea: Please Remember Our President Says Lots Of Crazy Bullshit

A sincere call for international understanding.

Can Trump Put Sinister Albino Julian Assange IN SPY JAIL? A Lawquestioner!

Trump administration says it's going to prosecute Assange. Can they do that? SHRUG EMOTICON!

Trump, GOP Still Getting Beat By Big Bad Dems! Your Wonkagenda For Fri., April 28, 2017

Trump so tired of the Washington rat race, Facebook tries to clean up its mess, and Hannity is screaming about the end of times. Your morning news brief!

OH NO ROB QUIST SAW NAKED PEOPLE

Let's all get drunk and go nayyyyy-kid, and dance by the light of the moon!

FCC Can’t Wait To Do For Internet What Trumpcare Will Do For Healthcare

One easy thing about this next fight over Net Neutrality: whatever Trump's position is, you can rest assured it's dead wrong.

Everybody Hates Donald Trump, Even Stupid Fox News Polls

XXX poll porn coming at YOUR FACE.

E.T. Phones VOICE Hotline

We could outsource the call center to Yoyodyne Industries.

Elijah Cummings Is Going To Kick Michael Flynn Right In His Russian Ass

The Pentagon told Flynn he wasn't allowed to take money from hostile foreign governments way back in 2014. Weird, right????

Senate’s Big White House North Korea Briefing Lamer Than Field Trip To Box Factory

At least the senators could make jokes about how in German, a bus ride is a 'Busfarht.'