US of America News

Gymnast-Molesting Doctor Thinks It Is Very Rude Of Judge To Make Him Listen To His Victims

Oh the poor, delicate flower... who molested and raped more than 140 girls and owned piles of child pornography.

ARE YOU READY TO SHUTDOWN???? A Wonksplainer Of ‘Yeah, No, Really, It’s Republicans’ Fault’

Remember when Trump said he'd sign any DACA deal Congress brought him? That was 10 days ago.

Lo Unto Us YET ANOTHER Fusion GPS Transcript Has Been Given!

It's Wonkette Story Time! COME READ WITH US!

Fox News Decided To Spare America From Thinking Of Donald Trump Boning Porn Star Before Election

Why would Fox have killed this story just before the election? Truly, a quandary.

She Shuts Shit Down By The Shit Show. Wonkagenda For Fri., Jan. 19, 2018

Republicans are about to shutdown the government (again), LA Times publisher is a big bag of dicks, and Fusion GPS told Congress Trump-Russia worse than we thought. Your morning news brief.

White House Wishes Everyone Would Be Good Christians Just Like Donald Trump

If you believe Donald Trump is a man of faith, you'll believe anything.

Sniveling Piss Wipe Tom Cotton Gonna Call The Cops On Your Nana For SAYING WORDS TO HIM

LOL OMG this is so fucking pathetic, we can't stop laughing.

Trumpland Appoints 24-Year-Old Frat Bro To Solve Opioid Crisis. All Better Now?

Good news, America! Some kid named Taylor is gonna, like, solve our drug problem.
Come get your Free Pot, Hippie Takers!

Nice Time! California Got Criminal Justice Reform In Your Legal Weed!

This is the smart way to decriminalize marijuana: Retroactively.

Trump Judge Draws Line At Sending Mexicans DIRECTLY TO GET BEHEADED BY CARTELS

It's hardly a roadblock to the New Cruelty, but any good news is still good news.

Robert Mueller Following The Money All The Way Up Russia’s Dirty, Dirty Ass

MONEY LAUNDERING SAY WHAT?

Compassionate Republicans Horrified At Cruel Dems For Killing CHIP

Oh, look! Republicans suddenly care about CHIP funding!

DOJ Cooks Up Racist Bullshit Burger To Prove All Foreigns Are Terrorists

There are lies, damn lies, and statistics. Then there's this report, which is racist nonsense.

Here’s What The Fuck Is Going On With Steve Bannon And Robert Mueller

Rachel Maddow figured it out. Rachel Maddow ALWAYS figures it out.

President Good Brain Sat Down With Reuters, Showed ‘Em Which One Is ‘Camel’

So glad we settled the question of whether Trump has dementia or not!