US of America News

still from Bee Movie with Winnie the Pooh in a rifle scope's crosshairs

Ryan Zinke To Permit Uday And Qusay Trump To Murder Bear Cubs, Too

Federally-mandated revision of 'Bambi' will have the little deer say his mother was a renewable resource, so fair's fair.

We Sure Do Hope Rod Rosenstein Knows What The Fuck He’s Doing Right Now

Maybe Rosenstein and Chris Wray have this shit under control. Maybe they don't and EVERYBODY SHOULD PANIC A LOT.

Everyone Mourns Differently. Father Of Texas School Shooter Mourns Like A Dick

Terrible how liberals blame others for their own actions. Just ask this Fox News watching NRA fan.

Duchess Meghan Markle, Bloody Feminist!

Men need to get their asses in the kitchen and fight those pots and pans too, because honestly, women are not dish slaves.

Idiot Gateway Pundit Reporter, But We Repeat Ourselves, Lectures Bernice King On Her Father, MLK

News Flash: Martin Luther King Jr. gave more than one speech, wingnuts skeptical.

Just When You Thought Michael Cohen Couldn’t Be Any Stupider, ALONG COMES THE ONION!

Michael Cohen knows bad journalism when he sees it, EVEN IN YOUR ONION.

You Can Have Donald Trump’s Jitterbug Old People Phone When You Pry It From His Cold Dead Hands

Now that Obama's out of office, no one would wire tapp Trump anyway.

Border Patrol Guy Keeps Montana Safe From Two US Citizens Speaking Spanish

He saw something, and he said something. Something stupid and bigoted.

Let’s Drink The Sweet Delicious Nazi Tears About Meghan Markle, Queen Of You!

It’s a Blackpocalypse! Hug your white children.

Can Donald Trump Jr. And Erik Prince Please Go The Fuck To Jail Yet?

At this point, the only shocking thing would be to learn the Trump campaign colluded with Americans to steal the election.

American Dreams Take Second Place To Precious, Precious Guns

10 people are dead. 10 more are injured. A very unemotional discussion of some costs of having more guns than people in America.

TFW Everyone Kicks You In The Nuts And You Think You’re WINNING!

Turns out there are actually downsides to sending a demented idiot out to represent our country.

President Poop Clown HEREBY DEMANDS To Be Treated Like Halfwit Wannabe Dictator He Is!

SOMEBODY woke up on the wrong side of his gold-plated pooper Sunday morning!