Legal

Praise The Lord! Neil Gorsuch Lets Jesus Into Supreme Court’s Cold Heathen (And Jewish) Heart!

You know who faces the most discrimination? CHURCHES! Amirite?

Trump Misplaces Naval Strike Group. Like You Haven’t! Wonkagenda, April 19, 2017

Jon Ossoff takes off running, Donald Trump loses his boats, and Nazi jerks get served. Your morning news brief!

Glenn Beck And Tomi Lahren Face Off In Court, Nation Prays For Meteor To Strike Them Both

The Blaze hired a 24-year-old monkey to sit in a cage and fling poo. It now complains that the monkey threw poo. Meanwhile, the monkey complains about the cage.

What Taxes? Trump Has No Taxes! Wonkagenda For Tues., April 18, 2017

In 24 hours Trump thanked a dictator, dodged his taxes, and blamed Obama for gang violence. Your morning news brief!

Arkansas’s Executionpalooza Canceled By Every Judge In The State! UNFAIR

Hide your face, America! Arkansas brings shame on the nation! Woo Pig Sooie!

France Looking For A Trump To Call Its Own. Wonkagenda For Mon., April 17, 2017

France idiots acting like American idiots. NO BUENO. Your daily news brief!

President Bannon Sleeps With The Fishes. Wonkagenda For Fri., April 14, 2017

The Wingnut-o-sphere is spinning in circles, Jared is moving in, and town halls get testy! Your morning news brief!

South Dakota Forcibly Jamming Catheters Up Children’s Pee-Pees, To Protect The Children

How does South Dakota protect kids? By holding them down and jamming a catheter in them, OF COURSE!

Gayness No Longer A (Legal) Firing Offense? Holy Shit, It’s Nice Time!

Is there anything good at all happening in our Trumpian hellscape dystopia? OMG, there actually IS!

Here Is Attorney General Jeff Sessions Being 100% Not A Holy Shit Y’all Racist

We got your 'Trump Era' swinging.

Spicey SO SORRY For Hitler! Wonkagenda For Wed., April 12, 2017

MANY NEWSES this morning, including Spicer apologizes for being A Idiot, Jeff Sessions is keeping it REAL (racist), did Bill O'Reilly get You're Fired? Your morning news brief!

United Airlines Pure And Good And Innocent, According To United Airlines

Would you be shocked to learn United Airlines is pretty sure it did nothing wrong?

Poor Wells Fargo Bankers Have To Give Back (Some) Fraud $$$. How Will They Even Live?

They say the hand is invisible so you can't see it doing obscene things

Chicago Police Put Own Special Spin On United Airlines Horror Show

The police officer involved in the United Incident has been placed on suspension.

Florida Sheriff Goes Full ISIS. Never Go Full ISIS.

Endorsement from Maine Gov. Paul LePage on the way, we're sure.

Fucked-Up United Airlines Thing Just Another Day For You And Me In Paradise

We bet you thought you'd seen the worst cops already. You had not seen the worst cops.