Recipe Hub

Does Yr Wonket like to cram things down your throat? Yes! Yr Wonket DOES like to cram things down your throat! Delicious things. Here are some of them:
I am so sorry you can't see the beautiful picture. You really are missing out!

Grown-Up Chicken SO GOOD SO TASTY SO YOU MAKE IT RIGHT NOW.

OK, so: President Bannon, fascist dictatorship, Constitutional crisis, WTF did he just tweet? Pissed off allies, Putin puppet, marriage equality LOL, RESISTANCE! PROTESTS! *Yawn* Typical week under the Trump regime, right? And the Real Writers here at Wonkette...
Fish that USED TO swim. (makes hand motion)

Feed Your Head With Balsamic Glazed Salmon

Wanna win the war? You'll need some brain food!
witty alt text goes here

Have Some Jewish Penicillin, Because We All Feel Pretty Sick Right Now

Part of Yr Wonkette's self care regimen. Also yummy for its own sake.
Just me, showing off my meat.

Beef Wellington: Proof That I Have Lost My Damn Mind

Are you ready for Pinkham's meat?
Totally Baked.

This Cheesy Garlic Chicken Will Help You Feel Better About 2016. Or At Least Full

OK, so the War On Christmas Season 2016 is over. FINALLY! You're done with the ultimate orgy of consumerism, and with spending half the day in the kitchen making some sort of extravagant meal you only attempt once or...
Soup for you!

Heat Up From The Inside With This Sweet, Savory Acorn Squash Soup!

Oh what is this deliciousness?
Chili that's better than yours.

The Best Chili You Will Ever Taste.

Winter ain't coming, Wonkers: it's HERE. And that means it's time to break out recipes that warm us from the inside. We need food that makes us feel full, and warm, and fuels us for hours, even in the...

Buy Almost Nothing Today Except For Our Family-Owned Small-Business Jazzy Funtimes Politicks Stuff!

It's Buy Nothing Day! But you can still buy our fabulous Christmasy presents tomorrow!

Eat This Leftover Stuffing Strata For Every Meal You Can For The Next Five Days

The most delicious way to eat every scrap of those leftovers. Thank us later!

Put Thanksgiving In Your Mouth With Grown-Up Baked Mac And Cheese, For Grown-Ups

This Wonkette classic was not originally a Thanksgiving recipe, but now America says it's OK to eat mac and cheese on Thanksgiving, hooray! We will be making this for OUR family, and you should too. Baking macaroni and cheese on...
"And so what happens in this room?"

Making Thanksgiving ‘Monkey Bread’ With Nancy Reagan

Enjoy this Wonkette Holiday Classic recipe all over again, as though The Gipper was still wandering around somewhere. Whatever the hell "monkey bread" might be -- something racist, we assume -- it was the thing our favorite first lady Nancy...

Put Some Food On Your Family With Aunt Wonkette’s Real Cranberry Business

No first lady could even imagine making something as wonderful and perfect as your editor's famous Wonkette Actual Awesome Real Cranberry Business. It is one of those things that just blows people away, because they assume it must be...

EMBRACE YOUR INNER OLIGARCH AND EAT RAW MEAT!

We now know that a "billionaire" will be following Barry Bamz into the White (Again) House, and he's promised to usher in an era we haven't experienced in generations. And if he carries through on his party's platform, there...

Now Drink This! Your ‘Salt And Pepper’ Election Night Cocktail!

Drink up sons and daughters! It's five o'clock Central!
Ohyeah! That's what I'm takling about!

Creamy Chicken Soup, Alvinball Style

Today, we're going to do something different. Usually, I start with ingredients, then tell you what to do with them. Not today. Today, we're making ALVINBALL* CREAMY CHICKEN SOUP! That's right: the rules are made up on the...
Almost Done!

Now It Is Time For All Good Men To Come And Eat This Cream Cheese Potato Soup

Eat with vodka. Serves six, or one.