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Condoleezza Rice? Ben Sasse? Mark Cuban? ANYONE?

Remember those ridiculous Penthouse Forum letters? The ones you'd read after you exhausted all the masturbatory potential of the pictures in Penthouse? Side note to our younger readers: yes, porn was once harder to...

We regret to inform you that the latest iteration of the Duggars, "Jill and Jessa: Counting Spawn On" has not yet been cancelled. Turns out prayers don't do shit. Perhaps we need to start...

You know what we love to do on the weekends here at yr Wonkette? We like to kick back and read some longreads. Who doesn't love to dig into a nice meaty story while drinking...

Donald Trump and Geraldo Rivera have a complicated relationship. They theoretically have undying love for one another (but not in a gay way, because no homo bro) yet is that love really possible when...

This is what you are greeted with when you tune to this week's episode of "Jill and Jessa: Counting On": Oh good. Because if there was one thing this squashy-baby-filled show was missing, it was...

Oh hello there. Were you wondering what it would look like if a rural preacher (who looks vaguely like a Dorian Gray-style painting of Dick Clark stashed in his closet for 45 years) showed up...

So, lots of Dennis Hastert news these days, huh? We all got to learn that he maybe molested not one, not two, not three, not four, but five kids while he was busy ostensibly...

Every week, we wake up early on Wednesday morning and say a little prayer to whatever bloodthirsty pagan god we're praying to this time that somehow, some way, the "Jill and Jessa: Counting On...

When you kick off your professional life with a cool one million dollars from Daddy (which you, laughably, characterized as a "small loan") and you file corporate bankruptcy and screw your creditors every time...

So, have you been dying to know what Tom DeLay has been up to these days? Hey, wait! Get back here. Just pretend you've been thinking about The Hammer aka The Exterminator aka The Indicted then...

Welcome to your headquarters for comprehensive coverage of Ted Cruz Thinking About Jacking It. We're planning on starting a new vertical that is nothing but stories of Ted Cruz thinking about his penis, your...

Oh boy oh boy oh boy. This is the Jill and Jessa episode we have been waiting for. No, not the one where Josh comes back all tearful from sex rehab (though that episode...

Over the weekend, we remained only vaguely aware of the fact that Colorado held some sort of complicated presidential nominating activity over on the GOP side. In a year marked by maximum primary season...

There has never really been any doubt that Donald Trump is the king of hyperbole. Telling everyone he is the very best at business is his actual #brand, even though his corporate empire has...

Hey everybody! TLC did not cancel this new-ish Duggar show yet! However, they also haven't yet trotted Josh Duggar out to show him no doubt crestfallen yet renewed in his vows to love Jesus...

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