Author Archives: Ron Garmon

  happy hitler funtimes yay!

Happy Wonker Book Club: Uncle Sam’s First Nazis

One reason America’s never come to grips with its racist-nationalist past is Americans are pointedly encouraged not to know a nationalist racist when they see one. One can scarcely write the word ‘Nazi’ online without angry writs from comments-section Godwin’s lawyers demanding all electronic conversation cease forthwith. Worse, even talking about an American fascism is liable to really upset American fascists, who, as we’re often reminded, are people too. This murk allows a horde of Christian righties, crypto-racists and besotted Putin-kissers to pass for ordinary conservatives, no different perhaps from your batty uncle that voted four times for Harold Stassen or that sweet elderly man down the block who was hauled away by ICE as a camp guard at Treblinka. Read more on Happy Wonker Book Club: Uncle Sam’s First Nazis…
  miami vicious

Carl Hiaasen’s ‘Dance Of The Reptiles': Like His Novels But A Little Less Fictiony

Mystery fans know Carl Hiaasen for the likes of Strip Tease and Tourist Season, brutally improbable yarns of one-eyed governors solving real estate murder crimes made plausible by their meticulous south Florida settings. Like the surreal, hard-living Harlem of Chester Himes and the bleak, no-exit Philadelphia of David Goodis, Hiaasen’s Florida is a bright nihilistic cul-de-sac the reader takes on narrative faith. After two decades’ worth of surreal news stories out of the Sunshine State, the public is primed for pretty much any kink of plot or backdrop. Read more on Carl Hiaasen’s ‘Dance Of The Reptiles': Like His Novels But A Little Less Fictiony…
  jesus wept

Bryan Fischer Shares Jesus’s Plan For The Poor: Hospitals, Turn Them Away

In a plain case of “Blessed are the poor for Bryan Fischer wants them dead,” the radio host and director of issues analysis at the American Family Association recently overshared some characteristically Deep Thoughts on fixing godless heathen Obamacare. The following Guide to A Good Christian’s Healthcare may prove helpful. Hospitals should send the poor away: Since it’s plainly an insult to Christianity for hospitals to force care on indigents, Fischer reasons “People need medical care, you will say. Right. People need to eat, too. How long would a grocer stay in business if he was required to offer food to everyone who walked in the door regardless of their ability to pay?” See how much easier moral problems are for Christians once Jesus goes under the bus? Allow low-premium, high-deductible insurance policies: This commonsense approach encourages the poor to set each other’s broken bones, pull their own teeth, cure Junior’s mumps through leeching and ritually slaughter oxen to ward off werewolves. Read more on Bryan Fischer Shares Jesus’s Plan For The Poor: Hospitals, Turn Them Away…
  criminals

Romney Campaign Finds New Goon To Love

News that the Romney campaign has taken on top gun “electoral strategist” Nathan Sproul gets unsurprisingly little attention. Distinguishing this Sproul from other vague shapes now buzzing the Citizen’s United honeywagon are long-buried reports of behavior that gives oppressive right-wing polluter-friendly theocracy a bad name. Lone, widely spaced APBs lean heavily on words like “goon,” “dirty trickster,” “brass knuckle tactics,” and “Teflon-style staying power” to describe Mr. Sproul and his contributions to 21st century democracy. This year, the good news for Sproul is that persistent allegations of massive “voter registration fraud” — as recounted by Sam Stein in this 2008 HuffPo expose -– are wingnut media’s wet dream of how Democrats get into office, so expect to hear little out of our brave liberal press about this veteran fixer in the months ahead. Read more on Romney Campaign Finds New Goon To Love…