• Leftist vaginaphobia exposed at last! [Hit & Run]
• 52% of Republicans believe ACORN was the 19th hijacker. [The Plank]
• Haven’t you always wondered what Mother Earth would look like if she rocked some Saturn ring-bling? Enter the YouTubes and MS Paint: she would look fabulous. [Andrew Sullivan]
• The liberal media: not actually communist, or just flirting? [Gateway Pundit]
• There’s really only two things that arouse Matthew Yglesias: heavy petting and the Central Bank. [Matt Yglesias]

Columbia Heights: Where white hipsters can watch from a comfortable distance as low-income minorities are murdered. This is what scholars call the “two cities” problem. [Why I Hate DC]
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Hoochiemama! Teenage cumsicle LEVI JOHNSTON shan’t be accepting the generous Turkey Day invitation from SARAH PALIN, who selflessly offered her home to Levi on national teevee! “You could tell by her laugh she was full of it,” explained Levi. And by “it,” Levi meant “a deep-seated desire to punch me, Levi Johnston, in the dick.” Stay away from Levi’s junk, Sarah! It is his livelihood … MORE »

• More fancy graphics in support of taxing marijuana cigarettes. [Hit & Run]
• Matt is very worried about nonchalant archeologists digging up nuclear waste just for the fun of it. [Matt Yglesias]
• Here is your masturbatory WHAT IF? of the day: WHAT IF Barack Obama is fatally electrocuted by a stingray BUT Joe Biden doesn’t want to be president SO Senator Byrd — who is old! — becomes president because he’s president pro tempore of the Senate? [The Corner]
• Erick Erickson had an intimate discussion with Sarah Palin at a WaPo salon (?). [RedState]
• The Anti-Defamation League continues to protect Barack Obama from Jew-haters. [The Caucus]

• Matt Yglesias dabbles in some parliamentary role playing. [Matt Yglesias]
• A thousand years from now, historians will agree that Barack Obama was the worst military strategist of all time. They will write heavily footnoted volumes about how even Bo could beat Barack in a simple game of Stratego. Yes. Barack Obama is a disgrace to America’s proud military might. [RedState]
• The port-drinking snooty-britches at Oxford quite nearly made “teabagger” the Most Beguiling Word Of The Year. [Think Progress]
• The terrible SEIU surrounded Joe Lieberman’s home and cut his power and teepeed his lawn and now who will rescue poor, fragile Joe Lieberman? Who will save him from these godless brutes? [Gateway Pundit]
• The Weekly Standard curates a Chinese “Flaming Barack Obama” exhibit. [Weekly Standard]

• Mark Shields goes on teevee, describes his favorite sweaty homoerotic fantasy in vivid detail. [Think Progress]
• Matt Yglesias is very relieved that CAP is forbidden by federal law to replace him with a genetically superior blogger. [Matt Yglesias]
• Who will protect America’s morbidly obese children from mutant, oven-sized cupcakes? [Weekly Standard]
• A CNN intern galloped through the busy markets of Beijing in search of ObaMaoist souvenirs, only to discover that such paraphernalia has been outlawed for all eternity! And according to Mr. Gateway Pundit this is very bad/good/communist/socialist/gay? Sometimes it’s just hard to tell. [Gateway Pundit]
• CEI will deposit $500 in Al Gore’s PayPal account if he finger-bangs Lord Monckton. $510.50 if CEI can watch. [The Corner]

Remember when you flushed your dead goldfish down the toilet and felt a little guilty because what if the goldfish clogs the pipes? Yes. Now replace “you” with “Metro” and “your dead goldfish” with “acid” and “felt a little guilty …” with “saved a butt-ton of money polluting like the dickens.” [DCist] MORE »

• Afghanistan…What to do in Afghanistan? Uh, let’s just go with the same strategy the Russians used, and then add a few sprinkles of Donald Rumsfeld for pizazz. [Matt Yglesias]
• Marco Rubio is such a delicious stud muffin. [TPM]
• Barack Obama really isn’t into that “saving” thing. It’s not his style. Barack Obama will not save your job. He doesn’t even save his doodles on MS Paint. [Gateway Pundit]
• Sorry ladies, but E.J. Dionne will not let you commit murder. No ma’am, Not on his watch! [Think Progress]
• Michelle Malkin is accepted to the Naval Academy! Congratulations, Michelle! [Michelle Malkin]

In an effort to reduce its carbon footprint, the REPUBLICAN NATIONAL COMMITTEE has pledged to recycle smear campaigns and political spin! Yes, MICHAEL STEELE has finally done it! He’s bringing back all your favorites: “flip-flopper” … WILLIE HORTON … “cut and run” … “Why did the Democrats flip-flop and let Willie Horton cut and run?” This is an important question Michael Steele will inevitably ask in the days to come. MORE »

• Too much yakking about whether Sarah Palin is “qualified” or “a dumbass.” Let’s just trust Rush Limbaugh’s expert judgment and move on. [Hot Air]
• RedState book club! And what are we reading this week? Oh, Jonah Goldberg’s Newberry-Awarding winning throw-up? Delectable. [RedState]
• The #1 reason the European Union blows is not that it’s a conglomerate of shameless socialist welfare states. (That’s the #2 reason.) No no, far worse is that because of the EU there are no more European wars! Oh, boo! [Matt Yglesias]
• Sean Hannity discusses the pros and cons of religious conservatives making sex tapes. [AMERICAblog]

• 2010 attack ads seem to come earlier every year! [RedState]
• OH merciful heavens! The SEIU are coming! The SEIU are coming! Quick Kenneth Gladney, go hide in the fallout shelter! [Gateway Pundit]
• Will America do the right thing and invade Fort Hood for harboring “al Qaeda?” There is, after all, a rather alarming precedent. [Weekly Standard]
• Is there anything the Westboro Baptist Church does like? How about puppies? Or chocolate cake? No. God hates it all. [True/Slant: Harmon Leon]
• AMERICAblog and Daily Kos are boycotting the DNC! Yes, they will no longer purchase boxes of Frosted DNC Flakes at the supermarket, even though the kids love it. The generic brand is more reasonably priced and just as tasty. [AMERICAblog]