According to frothy wingnut internet rag Newsmax, the desperate and comically flailing Romney campaign is about to “unleash” bellicose cartoon human Donald Trump to help Mitt Romney win the vote of angry white men who make less than $35,000 a year. In the article by discredited conservative fabricator Ed Klein, the author of “Amateur: Barak […]

The 200,000-plus inmates of the US Federal prison system had a wonderful surprise one day in July –– they received a special letter! Charles E. Samuels Jr., director of the Federal Bureau of Prisons, wrote an inspirational memo to each one of them wishing them the very best –– and imploring them not to commit […]

Mitt Romney is rumored to be close to selecting a running mate, and there’s a testosterone-laden badass on the short hairs list. Ohio Senator Rob Portman told the Associated Press that after flipping his kayak in Chile earlier this year he went adrenalin-mad like Mel Gibson in “Lethal Weapon 2″ and popped his dislocated shoulder […]

(Pittsburgh) A few days ago I was in Rome, now I’m in Pittsburgh. My serotonin level is in freefall. No, Pittsburgh’s nice, really! The frutti di mare is good here. It’s the jet lag and the hemorrhoidal bonfire in my ass that make me want to die. And my VISA bill. I asked an emaciated […]

(Rome) I just finished a perfectly-prepared sardine antipasti, caprese salad, and a plate of grilled calamari. The wine was a Pinot Grigio from the area. Nice. It’s hot as hell here, but a breeze is blowing off Palatine Hill, where Romulus and Remus suckled the she-wolf. When I close my eyes I can almost hear […]

(Zurich) The train to DeGaulle Airport was so hot that the wine I drank the night before poured out of me like water from the Fontaine Saint-Michel. My shirt was soaked and my deodorant was failing, and soon I would be seated inches from another passenger on an hour-long Swiss Air flight to Zurich. I […]

(Paris) Ah, the enchantment –– the boulevards, the catacombs, the long lines of tourists, the little dogs and the charming messes they leave on the pavement. I’m here in The City of Light wearing my red-white-and-blue monster truck cap with the words “American Debt Crisis Observer” embroidered on it. In the sidewalk cafes I notice […]

Things may suck here in the United States, but they’re wayyyy screwed in Europe. Chancellors, Presidents, Prime Ministers, Kings and Dukes have been convening summits weekly trying to figure out what to do about the hemorrhaging debt crisis. The steps taken so far, bailing out Portugal, Ireland, Greece and now Spain have been the kind […]