Ken Layne

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A writer and editor of this website from 2006 to early 2012, Ken Layne is occassionally seen on Twitter and writes small books and is already haunting you from beyond (your) grave.
"And so what happens in this room?"

Making Thanksgiving ‘Monkey Bread’ With Nancy Reagan

Enjoy this Wonkette Holiday Classic recipe all over again, as though The Gipper was still wandering around somewhere. Whatever the hell "monkey bread" might be -- something racist, we assume -- it was the thing our favorite first lady Nancy...

Put Some Food On Your Family With Aunt Wonkette’s Real Cranberry Business

No first lady could even imagine making something as wonderful and perfect as your editor's famous Wonkette Actual Awesome Real Cranberry Business. It is one of those things that just blows people away, because they assume it must be...
Headless Jesus welcomes you to Heaven, ghost eagle!

Time Again For Wonkette’s Annual Children’s Treasury Of Terrible 9/11 Art

It's our annual collection of bad 9/11 art by bad 9/11 artists

Christopher Columbus Was A Dick

One thousand years ago today -- or Monday, the 12th -- a terrible slave-trading murderer/imbecile who did not even know how to spell his own name, which is Latin for "asshole," landed at the "Sandals" resort in Puerto Rico...
Suddenly that gas price no longer indicates how old this photo is!

Let Us Now Praise Famous K-Lo Recipes: Carcass Stuffed With 10 Hamburgers

Important National Review Online pundit Kathryn Jean Lopez only really gets excited twice a year: When she makes up another excuse to get people to send her a bunch of porn, and when Thanksgiving comes around so she can...
"And so what happens in this room?"

Making Thanksgiving ‘Monkey Bread’ With Nancy Reagan

Enjoy this Wonkette Holiday Classic recipe all over again, as though The Gipper was still wandering around somewhere. Whatever the hell "monkey bread" might be -- something racist, we assume -- it was the thing our favorite first lady Nancy...

Put Some Food On Your Family With Aunt Wonkette’s Real Cranberry Business

The following is our annual repost of Ken Layne's Real Cranberry Business, because when we bought this bitch we bought the archives too. One hundred and seventy two years from now, "Ken Layne" will be retelling his cranberry business...

Ken Layne And Wonkette Helped Rescue The Country From Doddering Crab King John McCain

It was seven unlucky years ago when a handsome young man named Alex Pareene typed to me on G-chat with a sex proposition: "Save me from guest editor hell," he said. Pareene, an NYU film school dropout who had...

Now We Shall Repost Ken Layne’s Repost Of Juli Weiner’s Writeup Of Betty Ford’s Boozy Chocolate Cake

Who can forget this classic Thanksgiving liquor cake recipe from First Lady Betty Ford? Our dearly departed Juli Weiner wrote this up several Thanksgivings ago, and we still reprint it every year, even though now she makes Harry Potter...

Making Thanksgiving ‘Monkey Bread’ With Nancy Reagan

Enjoy this Wonkette Holiday Classic recipe all over again, as though The Gipper was still wandering around somewhere: Whatever the hell "monkey bread" might be -- something racist, we assume -- it was the thing our favorite first lady...

K-Lo Posts Her Dream Recipe: Carcass Stuffed With 10 Hamburgers

Important National Review Online pundit Kathryn Jean Lopez only really gets excited twice a year: When she makes up another excuse to get people to send her a bunch of porn, and when Thanksgiving comes around so she can...

Now We Shall Repost Ken Layne’s Repost Of Juli Weiner’s Writeup Of Betty Ford’s Boozy Chocolate Cake

Who can forget this classic Thanksgiving liquor cake recipe from First Lady Betty Ford? Our dearly departed Juli Weiner wrote this up several Thanksgivings ago, and we still reprint it every year, even though now she makes Harry Potter...

Put Some Food On Your Family With Aunt Wonkette’s Real Cranberry Business

The following is our annual repost of Ken Layne's Real Cranberry Business, because when we bought this bitch we bought the archives too. One hundred and seventy two years from now, "Ken Layne" will be retelling his cranberry business...

Will You ‘Quit Money’ On U.S. Tax Day, Like ‘The Man Who Quit Money’?

American Tax Day is an unhappy time for most people, as we realize how little money we made during the previous year, or how much we're paying in taxes, or how those good tax credits don't apply for one...

Your Wonkette Has a New Wonkette Publisher/Editor, For Freedom!

Good morning from your Wonkette editor since, oh, 2006. It has been an exciting (terrible?) six years, hasn't it? There was old what's his name, and Iraq, and the Great Recession, and then the sexy president with his singing...

Wonkette Art Contest: Win Bill Maher Tickets With Your Terrible Computer Picture

Do you have "Microsoft Paint" on your iPhone? Then you can be a prize-winning published artist! (Maybe.) Wonkette and 9:30 Club/IMP Promotions invite you to take part in our exciting "Make an image of Bill Maher wrestling the Pope"...