Ken Layne
A writer and editor of this website from 2006 to early 2012, Ken Layne is occassionally seen on Twitter and writes small books such as this one, Dignity.
April 16, 2012
Will You ‘Quit Money’ On U.S. Tax Day, Like ‘The Man Who Quit Money’?
American Tax Day is an unhappy time for most people, as we realize how little money we made during the previous year, or how much we’re paying in taxes, or how those good tax credits don’t apply for one reason or another, or how awful it is that we live in a country where the [...]
March 2, 2012
Your Wonkette Has a New Wonkette Publisher/Editor, For Freedom!
Good morning from your Wonkette editor since, oh, 2006. It has been an exciting (terrible?) six years, hasn’t it? There was old what’s his name, and Iraq, and the Great Recession, and then the sexy president with his singing and dancing all the time. And now your longtime editor will finally stop disappearing for months [...]
February 15, 2012
Wonkette Art Contest: Win Bill Maher Tickets With Your Terrible Computer Picture
Do you have “Microsoft Paint” on your iPhone? Then you can be a prize-winning published artist! (Maybe.) Wonkette and 9:30 Club/IMP Promotions invite you to take part in our exciting “Make an image of Bill Maher wrestling the Pope” ticket giveaway. One lucky winner will get two (2) tickets to see teevee’s Bill Maher at [...]
Uhh, wasn’t this supposed to be wrapped up by now? No. Not when all your candidates are so terrible. Rick Santorum is back in the race, in other words. He won Missouri! That’s … let’s see, 55% for Santorum, which is DOUBLE Mitt Romney’s second place finish. Meanwhile, in the “near the Mormons” state of [...]
Here’s some more awkward humor from the robot comedy that is Mitt Romney’s 2012 ascent to the GOP nomination: Mittens actually did worse on Saturday in the Nevada GOP caucus than he did back in 2008. This time around, “Inevitable Willard” got 50.1%, or a little less than his winning total back in the 2008 [...]
February 5, 2012
Romney Wins Super Bowl of Nevada GOP 2012 Politics, Again
There was another caucus, apparently! The reason nobody noticed is because it was in Nevada, which is actually home to lots of Republican-voting Mormons. (Take out the corporate prostitution resort of Las Vegas in the southern corner of the state, and Nevada is just a sparsely populated length of mountains and desert right next to [...]
January 31, 2012
Everybody Please Prepare To Have Jim Newell Back At Wonkette, Next Week
HOORAY! That is what your semi-managing editor has to say about this important news, from your beloved past-and-future Wonkette typing monster of Capitol Hill, Jim Newell: An Important Announcement Regarding Your Gawker Political Desk: Goodbye Tuesday greetings from the Gawker Political Desk! We have some news: This will be the last post for its main [...]
January 30, 2012
Canada (Two Teenagers + Lego Man) Takes Over American Space Program
Things have not been going so well for America’s space program. We had a sad when we read about how the Obama Administration basically told Barack he could not have any exciting or inspirational “moon shot” programs, because everything had to go to Wall Street (heh heh). So not only did “moon shot”-style inspirational programs [...]
Top honors will be given to a brave TSA Body Scanner machine at the Nashville airport for apprehending a sinister Dalek robot-monster that was impersonating Senator Rand Paul. The cylon version of Rand Paul triggered the radioactive Body Scanner because of some miniscule fabrication error in the android’s knee joints — the scanner apparently had [...]
January 21, 2012
Newtmania! Gingrich Wins South Carolina, Will Lose 80%-20% To Obama
That was faster than dumping an ex-wife in the cancer ward! Whining jewelry piglet and serial divorcing sac of ethics violations Newt Gingrich has just been projected as the Big Wiener of the South Carolina confederate primary. Should we live blog this historic moment, which comes exactly 15 years after the last historic moment for [...]
January 21, 2012
Tensions Low At Fake ‘Ham House’ Feud Between Romney, Gingrich
Trouble was unfortunately not at all apparent early Saturday at a non-chain breakfast diner where national media could pick up some “local color” on a day when followers of political news are interested in reading new developments, but there are no new developments. Polls will not close until 7 p.m. Eastern time. What to do [...]
January 19, 2012
Homeless Child Spared Usual Fate of Homeless Children Due To Rare Intellectual Gifts
Here is an “inspirational story” to make everybody happier about homelessness, etc.: A 17-year-old girl has been saved from homelessness, and a celebrity has given her poor family a home, all because the 17-year-old girl is an immensely gifted science prodigy. After becoming a semifinalist in a prestigious national science competition, a homeless Long Island [...]
