Kirsten Boyd Johnson
Yes, friends, your beloved election girlfriend and California GOP candidate for U.S. Senate Orly Taitz has finally found the time don a suit of medieval armor, sit down with a tank of nitrous oxide pilfered from the dental office supply closet along with one hundred cigarettes and then take alternating puffs on each until she [...]
Now look here, whiners. The tearful consternation over the United States executive branch’s special new indefinite detention superpowers over any human Earthling including its own citizens that it can pin down long enough to slap a “TERRORIST” sticker on his forehead and haul him away at its very own special Pope-caliber hyper-infallible discretion — it’s [...]
American democracy’s most persistent old fart Ron Paul has announced that he no longer cares for democracy per se in the traditional sense of trying to “win votes” from “voters,” because this is a hard thing to do, when your platform is mostly insane. “We will no longer spend resources campaigning in primaries in states [...]
Just when we were feeling that the 2012 election cycle seemed suspiciously light on mentally unstable long shot candidates, Mother Jones brings us a delightful little profile of Minnesota GOP congressional candidate Allen Quist, whom queen lunatic Michele Bachmann recently endorsed while noting that in her opinion, the former state representative is a man of [...]
North Carolina Governor Bev Perdue is extremely unhappy with the 61 percent of her tragically dumb constituents who voted to constitutionally ban gay marriage and gay civil unions in the state. How unhappy? Full nuclear insult unhappy: “People are saying what in the world is going on with North Carolina, we look like Mississippi.” OH [...]
Here is the last amendment that North Carolina added to its state constitution regarding its rules for marriage, in 1875. About time for an update, you might say? A majority of North Carolinians also agree, time for a constitutional update! Now, who will explain to all those North Carolina voters exactly what an “update” is?
Here is the ghostly ballroom where Dick Lugar’s six-term Senate career is doing a sad, invisible waltz of doom. NBC is calling the Indiana GOP Senate primary for teabagger Dick Mourdock, thereby “putting the seat in play for Democrats in the fall,” because Mourdock is some sort of terrible nut who has promised to leave [...]
The weather outlook for South Carolina politics is “veritable shitstorm” for the next month or so owing to the hilarious-tragic inability of either major party to follow state election commission filing rules for candidates, which led the South Carolina Supreme Court last week to issue a monstrous “F” in reading comprehension to 180 candidates who [...]
Nashville Nutz Alert operative “Ames” sends your Wonkette this delightful nature photograph of Truck Nutz roaming free and happy in the wilds of a Tennessee parking lot, for all of us to enjoy. Savor it while you can! The Truck Nutz report from South Carolina indicates that over there, the species is being hunted to [...]
It is Tequila and Mini-Sombreros Day in America, hooray! It always seems like Cinco de Mayo should be Mexican Independence Day — dressing to match a national flag and getting wasted on a holiday named after its date on the calendar is how independence days are done, right? But today is actually the day when [...]
