Evan Hurst

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Evan Hurst is the Senior Editor of Wonkette. He spends his days deflecting the sad glances of his black lab, Lula, who would please like him to stop typing letters to the internet and throw the squeaky chicken in the backyard instead. Though the internet does not give him credit, it's probably his fault Aaron Schock is no longer a congressperson, due how Evan would not stay off his tail during the SCANDALS. (Not in a sex way, in a writing way!) Also, he writes songs and plays the piano, at the same time! Lastly, Evan is a Southern person, and thus is casting polite judgment on you, right now, for reading this. Bless your heart.

The "No Doo Doos For Transgenders" ordinance is dead!

Hillary Clinton releases two anti-Trump ads, and trust, they are delightful!

Oh golly, North Carolina idiot Gov. Pat McCrory and the other Republicans who helped create the state's insane anti-LGBT discrimination law are making the saddest panty gravy right now! You see, on Wednesday, Obama's mean...
You will be seduced.

UH OH is former Massachusetts Sen. Scott "Nakey Time" Brown having a sad? He got on the radio in Boston to accuse that lady who beat him, Sen. Elizabeth "Badass" Warren, of being a...

Oh hey, it is Wednesday afternoon, which means it is time for your weekly dance party, where we shuffle our iTunes, post the first ten songs that come up at random, and you all...

Hey it's Wednesday, wanna fawn all over Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau for no goddamn reason? Good, we do too. So, the Invictus Games are this really nice thing created by sexxxy Prince Harry,...
This screengrab is so mean, but why not?

Oh hell, in all our jizz-citement over Ted Cruz running away to eat a million cans of soup by himself in hell, and in our glee about the loser #NeverTrump people beating themselves up...

Did you guys hear the news? NO, Ted Cruz did not die in a fire made out of dildos soaked with the blood of the risen Christ, why would you think that?! But you...

Are you a big fan of Pixar who struggles daily to communicate your homophobic values to your cartoon children? The Jehovah's Witnesses have a solution for you. Do you get squicked out when you...
Someone help him, please

Oh hey, Bill Kristol, how's it hangin'? You out there in America somewhere, bein' wrong? Duh, of course. So, in case you didn't know, Bill Kristol, the man who is never always wrong, has been...

OH HEY INDIANA, LOOK AT YOUR HANDSOME ASSES RIGHT NOW! You are doing #Democracy, by voting in your presidential primary! You better go fast though, because polls close at 6 PM local time, which...

Y'all listen up, for we actually have a #NiceTime involving gaywad-sexuals what live in Mississippi! We mentioned when we reported on the state's horrific, most-insane-in-the-nation "religious freedom" bill, that a mean federal judge had...

Did you hear about the breaking news about how on top of how Ted Cruz is maybe the Zodiac Killer, his dry-drunk dad might have been Lee Harvey Oswald's fluffer when he murdered our...
that's the devil in your pants

Let's get one thing out of the way: Kirk Cameron is cute. This is why it such a screaming shame he fell in with the wrong crowd and became a creationist dickweasel fundamentalist Christian....

Oh look, Fox News is being racially transcendent again! We predicted after the White House Correspondents Dinner, AKA Nerd Prom, that the race experts at Fox News and other shining lights of the wingnut-igentsia would...

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