Evan Hurst

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Evan Hurst is the Senior Editor of Wonkette. He spends his days deflecting the sad glances of his black lab, Lula, who would please like him to stop typing letters to the internet and throw the squeaky chicken in the backyard instead. Though the internet does not give him credit, it's probably his fault Aaron Schock is no longer a congressperson, due how Evan would not stay off his tail during the SCANDALS. (Not in a sex way, in a writing way!) Also, he writes songs and plays the piano, at the same time! Lastly, Evan is a Southern person, and thus is casting polite judgment on you, right now, for reading this. Bless your heart.

Lo Unto Us YET ANOTHER Fusion GPS Transcript Has Been Given!

It's Wonkette Story Time! COME READ WITH US!

Sniveling Piss Wipe Tom Cotton Gonna Call The Cops On Your Nana For SAYING WORDS TO HIM

LOL OMG this is so fucking pathetic, we can't stop laughing.

Robert Mueller Following The Money All The Way Up Russia’s Dirty, Dirty Ass

MONEY LAUNDERING SAY WHAT?

Here’s What The Fuck Is Going On With Steve Bannon And Robert Mueller

Rachel Maddow figured it out. Rachel Maddow ALWAYS figures it out.

President Good Brain Sat Down With Reuters, Showed ‘Em Which One Is ‘Camel’

So glad we settled the question of whether Trump has dementia or not!

Lindsey Graham And Donald Trump Are ON A BREAK!

Lindsey Graham gonna teach that philandering Donald Trump a lesson, yes siree.

Is Donald Trump Crossing His Fingers For His Very Own 9/11? Maaaybe!

What about a Reichstag Fire? Or a Moscow Apartment Bombing? Would Trump like one of those?

Eric Trump With Perfect Defense: Donald Trump Too Greedy To Be Racist!

SHUT UP, WONKETTE, ERIC IS, LIKE, REALLY SMART!

White House Doc Says President Beef Poots Only Weighs 239 Pounds, So That’s Some Bullshit

Also says Trump has a very good brain, to which we reply LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!

Cory Booker Just Called Kirstjen Nielsen A Complicit Asshole, And We Are HERE FOR IT

Fuuuuuuuuuuck! Welcome to your new job, Madame Secretary!

Trump’s Aryan Homeland Security Idiot Kirstjen Nielsen DOES NOT REMEMBER, OK?

How could she remember if Trump said 'shithole' when she can't even remember if there are white people in Norway?

Kevin McCarthy Gives Trump Red And Pink Starbursts, Not The Other Colors, Those Are Shithole Starbursts

WHO'S A GOOD BOY? WHO'S A GOOD BOY? KEVIN MCCARTHY IS A GOOD BOY!

Trump’s Twitter Insults Getting Even Less Clever, Because Somehow That Was Possible

Stable genius can't figure out how to insult SOMEBODY NAMED DICK.

MAXINE WATERS, YOU STOP HURTING THE DAILY CALLER’S RACIALLY TRANSCENDENT MLK DAY FEELINGS RIGHT NOW!

Maxine Waters can say what she fucking wants, please and thanks.