Sarah Palin Leads ‘Not Sure’ By 8 Points For 2014 Alaska Senate Race
So what if she’s not actually running (yet), and maybe she spends most of her time in Arizona these days, but if she wants the job, a new poll shows bitter quitter Sarah Palin leading the contenders for the 2014 GOP Senate nomination in Alaska. The poll, sponsored by some Tea Party fan fiction club [...]
James Dobson So Glad Feminism Is Over and Women Want to Be Mommies Again
Hello Americans! Focus on the Family founder James Dobson would like you to know that, despite an advanced state of fossilization, he has not “retired to a quiet farm somewhere,” and is still just as much a patriarchal asshat as ever! In a rambling Mother’s Day message, Dobson takes some comfort that, in the midst [...]
The Blaze Just Asking: Did Imam’s One Weird Prayer Damn Navy Seals To Hell At Their Own Funeral?
You guys should go take a look at Ana Marie Wossername’s thinky piece about how the wingnut media doesn’t seem to have learned a damn thing from the failure of its “Obama Is Evil” narrative in the 2012 election. It’s pretty good, and we think this writer has a lot of potential. But we honestly [...]
Friday Nice Time: Hugo Chavez Gets Fired Strawberry Pickers Their Jobs Back
Bad news: Last week, when strawberry pickers near Oxnard, California, wanted to GTFO of the heavy smoke from a nearby wildfire, their employers were all “DIAF, dudes, like LITERALLY.” But the workers decided they would rather not die for cheap strawberries, and so the agribidniss fired them for walking off the job. During a fire. [...]
With ‘Rot’ In Missile Crews And All The Rapiness, Air Force Faces Severe Purity Of Essence Gap
Wonkers of the Cold War era (which is like all but seven of you, right?) may remember the somber documentaries about the grim job of manning missile silos, with the narrator intoning that the 2-man crews had standing orders to shoot their partner if he went insane. (This may not actually be true, but we [...]
Minnesota Terror Suspect: Patriot, Gun Fondler, Juggalo
So, yet another home-grown terrorist has been arrested, this time a 24-year-old man who was stockpiling guns, pipe bombs, and Molotov cocktails in his parents’ mobile home near Montevideo, Minnesota. We don’t wish to stereotype (actually, why not, since it saves time?), but you have to figure that somebody with a name like Buford “Bucky” [...]
Politifact: Why Is Martina Navratilova Lying By Saying All These True Things?
So you probably heard about Jason Collins, the sportsball man who said he was gay last week? And almost everyone said, Oh, that’s nice, sure, except for the usual crowd of jerks? And of course we all know that Collins was not really the first gay sportsball man, or even the first gay sportsballer or [...]
Jenny Sanford’s 2010 Book Suggests Mark Sanford Maybe A Bit Of A Dick
There’s this exciting special election happening in South Carolina today between a comedian’s sister and a hiking aficionado. This being South Carolina, the slime machine has been running at high RPMs, with nasty push polls making anonymous slurs against Elizabeth Colbert-Busch, and over the weekend, the Stupidest Man on the Internet ran — twice — [...]
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Deleted Comment Of The Day: ‘Your Face Is So Far Up Obama’s Ass…’
by Doktor Zoom
As you all know, Yr Wonkette does not allow comments, but if we did, we would certainly get a lot of interesting communications! For instance, we received this missive from “jsk” in response to Thursday’s story about the nonrevelations in the Benghazi hearings: What a poorly written article. How can anyone be taken seriously who [...]