Doktor Zoom

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Doktor Zoom Is the pseudonym of Marty Kelley, who lives in Boise, Idaho. He acquired his nym from a fan of Silver-Age comics after being differently punctual to too many meetings. He is not a medical doctor, although he has a real PhD (in Rhetoric and Composition). He loves upvoting your comments but Disqus is broken and his upvotes don't "stick." Just assume he upvoted what you said, because it was excellent and witty.
Stoning scene from 'Life of Brian'

Jesus Wept.

There's letting the punishment fit the crime, and then there's this daycare in Arkansas.

Ivanka Blows Kisses While Gaza Strip Burns

Jared should have that peace deal ready any minute now.

John Kelly Says USA Has No Room For Illiterate Peasants, Didn’t Mean His Own Ancestors

He's not racist. He just wishes immigrants had the job skills America needs. Like being white.

Scott Pruitt Stars In ‘My Dinner With Accused Sex-Abuser Cardinal Who Says Global Warming’s Fake’

Scott Pruitt has some funny ideas about how science works -- and about who counts as an expert on climate.

Maxine Waters Runs Right Over Paul Ryan But Still Gets Rolled On Racist Car Loans

When Paul Ryan says he wants to help you, RUN.

KKK Imperial Jerkoff Guilty Of Gun-Fuckery During Charlottesville Klanbake

Looks like more white genocide, huh.
At the McClean (Virginia) of Madness

Guess How Many Torture Fans Named Dick Cheney Want To Bring Back Torture? ALL OF THEM!

Scary vice-presidential stories to tell in the dark.
Free kitten with every five mass shootings

America, Massachusetts Would Like To Have A Word With You About Guns.

A gun law that goes beyond cursory background checks? Fascinating! Tell me more!

US Diplomats Said ‘Please Don’t Deport Refugees, It’s Bad.’ Trump Said, ‘We Still Have Diplomats?’

Maybe immigration isn't such a hot idea after all. Just look how all these white people are fucking the place up.
bad photoshop of Trump's head on Nixon waving goodbye from his helicopter after resigning

Donald Trump Might Be Taking His Richard Nixon Cosplay A Little Too Seriously

History doesn't repeat itself, but this sucker's rhyming like crazy.
Don Blankenship at a -- get this -- Labor Day event.

Don Blankenship Gets Mineshafted

Turns out Don's ship was shooting blanks.

Trump Admin Wants To Let Teens Fall Off Roofs So They Can Feed Their Teen Families

This ought to get the little bastards off their iPhones.

Guess Melania Trump Picked The Wrong Day To Start Caring About Children

Jeff Sessions loves America so much he'll rip families apart to protect American values. Which now include RIPPING FAMILIES APART.

NRA Picks Oliver North As Next President. Libs Fuckin’ Triggered, Man

Why would the NRA pick a controversial figure like Ollie North? Why WOULDN'T it?

Don Blankenship Wouldn’t Have To Hit You, Trump, If You Didn’t Make Him So Mad

If Don Blankenship wins, Joe Manchin has a better chance to hold his Senate seat. If he loses, we may not have to hear about Don Blankenship for a while.