Author Archives: Doktor Zoom

Full Name: Doktor Zoom Website:
Info: Doktor Zoom lives in Boise, Idaho. He acquired his pseudonym after being differently punctual to too many meetings. He is not a medical doctor, although he has a real PhD (in Rhetoric and Composition).

Wonkette Proudly Brings You Wonkette Finger Puppets, For Your Fingers

  Wonkette Fun-Times Activity Book
Just how great do these look? SO GREAT
Let’s be honest about our motives here. We’re jealous. Yes, jealous, we say, — of ...
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CIA, On Careful Reflection, Remembers It Hacked Senate Computers After All

  spy kids
This is my
Hey, remember back in March when Senate Intelligence Committee chair Dianne Feinstein, who is usually ...
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Rapper Warren G. Reads Warren G. Harding’s Old-Timey Sexts To His Sidepiece

  smutty fuck notes
Warren G. Hardon
From the Jimmy Kimmel teevee program, here’s some excerpts from the super-steamy mash notes of ...
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Now Is The Time For All Good Americans To Nerdcrush On Ruth Bader Ginsburg

  all the dissents Katie
Katie Couric has this hot job doing the online journalisming with Yahoo now, and she spent some time ...
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Wild-Eyed Commies Jon Stewart And Stephen Colbert Being Un-American Again

  clipbait
Won't someone think of the corporations?
Here’s a rare two-fer: Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert both did segments Wednesday on the ...
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Utah Language School Fires Blogger For Promoting Homophone Agenda

  And Synonyms Just Make People Sin
And there go a quarter of the comments...
No matter how much we wish this was a case of a paper overselling its headline, it is absolutely ...
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Stalkers And Domestic Abusers Aren’t Allowed To Have Guns, Unfair!

  a shot in the dark
Gabby Giffords at a gun show. Obviously wants to ban all guns
OK, so if 26 dead children in Newtown, and a couple hundred dead kids since then, aren’t a good ...
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George Zimmerman Goes On Patrol Again, ‘Guards’ Gun Store For Free, Gets Canned

  Things Were Really Looking Up For Ol' Zimm
Guns! Guns! Guns!
So here’s the latest in the epic wanderings of George “Killer But Not A Murderer” ...
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This Victoria Jackson Story Has A Video Of A Butt That Opens Beers

  Wonkette Vagina Dentata Panties: Tasteful By Comparison
It's a bottle opener but it's a can, too!
Wonkette Best Frenemy Victoria Jackson is, of course, running for a County Commissioner seat in ...
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Wingnut Congressional Candidate Lady Simply Does Not Care For ‘Infected Poors’

  If She Says 'Also Too' We'll Know For Sure
Itr's time for Weppner, yeah. I'm an excellent driver.
This serious-looking lady surrounded by insane anti-immigrant signs (including one decrying the ...
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Phoenix Airport Gun Humper’s Neuroscience Bosses Stuff Him Down The Memory Hole

  his cold dead coffee
Explains a lot
Yesterday, we brought you the story of gun-loving neurological researcher Dr. Peter Steinmetz, whose ...
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Stephen Colbert Lurves The Sarah Palin Channel Almost As Much As We Do

  clipbait
He's a fine one to talk -- he's quitting too
Stephen Colbert is just thrilled that Sarah Palin has started a new online TV channel where you can ...
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Virginia Group’s Anti-Gay Marriage Fast Allows People To Eat. Say, What’s Their Policy On Celibacy?

  not so fast buddy
How can you stop any weddings if you do eat your meat?
In our “Say Whaaaaat?” basket this afternoon, we have this oddness: The Virginia Family ...
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Stupidest Men On The Internet: Obama Bringing Africans, Ebola, And Polygamy To America!

  Barack Ebola
It is never the wrong time to panic
Jim Hoft, the Stupidest Man on the Internet, and Kristinn Taylor, the Stupidest Guest Blogger on the ...
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Militia Boys Havin’ A Good Ol’ Time Keeping The Border Safe From Eight-Year-Olds, Yeehaw

  Comic-Con Has Far Better Costumes
so brave
From the San Antonio Express-News, we have a photo update on the Great Big Militia Border Protection ...
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Stephen Colbert Just Loves Him Some Comic-Con Nerds, Also Rich People (Video)

  clipbait
Thwipp!
We’re going to throw a double dose of Stephen Colbert at you this morning, mostly because ...
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WND Idiot Erik Rush Just Asking Whether Obama Shot Down Flight 17 (He Totally Did)

  So Nuts He Makes the Other Rush Look Sane
The shocking evidence the mainstream media don't want you to see!
WND columnist and wackaloon conspiracy theorist (ah, but we repeat ourselves) Erik Rush, who’s ...
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Arizona Strip Club Throws Its Pasties Behind Progressive Pastor For Congress

  Unskewed Stripper Polls
Naked political ambition
In a story that has a hint of Carl Hiaasen’s Strip Tease to it — the novel, not the Demi ...
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Secessionist Maryland GOP Candidate Remembers The Good Old ‘Dixie’ Days

  not just whistling
The secret of his secession
Here’s Mike Peroutka, a great Constitutional Scholar who knows that the key to understanding ...
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