Sorry, Homosexual America, but Bryan Fischer is thinking about You People again. By golly, it’s almost as if Bryan Fischer can’t think of many things other than gay people. This time, the mouthpiece for the American Patriarchy Association is having kittens over the possibility that the Boy Scouts of America may vote to allow sodomites [...]

It took a while, sure, but the Marion Berry copycats are suddenly coming out in droves! (They are just really really slow copycats because of their drug-induced torpor.) That is, if two counts as “droves,” and we figure fuck it, because that’s easily enough examples for a New York Times trend piece. So here’s the [...]

Hey, Reddit, we know you like being all free-speechy over there, and that you took forever to close down forums like r/creepshots and then winked and nodded when it re-emerged as “candid fashion police” (haha, close-up pictures of boobs and asses, only with the pretense of mocking the fashion sense of the unsuspecting, non-consenting women [...]

You may recall how, back in April, Tennessee state Sen. Jon Lundberg bestowed upon himself a resolution declaring Tennessee state Sen. Jon Lundberg the kindest bravest, warmest, most wonderful human being in the history of EVER. This week, Sen. Lundberg, recognizing that he’ll never match his confrere Stacy Campfield in the sheer asshattery needed to [...]

Hey there, Pacific Northwest and maybe even British Columbian Wonkeetteers, and whatever sea lions ain’t busy eating all the salmon at the Bonneville Dam, mark your colanders for Saturday June 1, when we will gather at The Blarney Stone in beautiful downtown Seattle at 7 in the PM. We will sing union songs and pee [...]

Today, Mother Jones brings us news of yet another exciting environmental development: the enormous lagoons of manure that are the inevitable result of large scale hog farms are home to some wondrous chemical reactions, resulting in a dangerous, highly combustible mess (LUNCH WARNING!): starting in about 2009, in the pits that capture manure under factory-scale [...]

Poopypants draft dodger Ted Nugent loves America and the Constitution so much, you guys! He’s even got a plan to save our land from the flood of Messicans by sentencing all illegal immigrants to 5 years of indentured servitude, after which they can stay, maybe. In a WND column that reads like something a group [...]

You know what’s outrageous? The way that Christians are constantly being oppressed in this country! Like for instance how a high school track team in Texas had its win taken away and was disqualified from going to the state championship, all because the winning runner in the 4X100 meter relay, Christian athlete Derrick Hayes, pointed [...]

Since “competition” and “efficiency” and “unit cost” are key to success in international trade and to maintaining the prosperous lifestyle we all enjoy in today’s modern America of today, it’s not too big a surprise that U.S. retailers might balk at anything that would make their costs go up. That’s just the Free Market, right? [...]

Stupidest Man on the Internet Jim Hoft has a guest blogger, Mara Zebest, who is VERY VERY WORRIED about the disturbing anti-American message sent by the official White House Twitter Feed of Occupied Amercia, which she has decided depicts a “fallen Eagle.” Zebest, a self-proclaimed “Adobe Photoshop expert” who wrote Joe Arapaio’s “analysis” of Barack [...]

The Associated Press reports that the Justice Department “secretly obtained two months of telephone records” of its reporters and editors in what appears to be an attempt to discover the identity of a leaker. Not to stop a terrorist or save a hostage or rescue adorable puppies from the Grinch, but to figure out who [...]

So what if she’s not actually running (yet), and maybe she spends most of her time in Arizona these days, but if she wants the job, a new poll shows bitter quitter Sarah Palin leading the contenders for the 2014 GOP Senate nomination in Alaska. The poll, sponsored by some Tea Party fan fiction club [...]

Hello Americans! Focus on the Family founder James Dobson would like you to know that, despite an advanced state of fossilization, he has not “retired to a quiet farm somewhere,” and is still just as much a patriarchal asshat as ever! In a rambling Mother’s Day message, Dobson takes some comfort that, in the midst [...]

Actual history information: some maybe-newly-discovered postwar interview notes with Adolf Hitler’s doctors have turned up that have led Ghost Breitbart and the Washington Examiner to the Perfectly Reasonable Conclusion that Adolf Hitler was an obviously fogget. Despite the excitable headlines in the these two fine media establishments, however, Hitler’s doctors didn’t say he was gay [...]

One nice thing about writing for Yr Wonkette is that we don’t even have to pretend to hide our raging nerd-crush on Rachel Maddow, or pretend that we don’t just melt in fannish excitement when she acknowledges the existence of our little mommyblog — she’s called Wonkette “profane and excellent” on air…twice! (Squeee!) So we [...]


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