Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom Is the pseudonym of Marty Kelley, who lives in Boise, Idaho. He acquired his nym from a fan of Silver-Age comics after being differently punctual to too many meetings. He is not a medical doctor, although he has a real PhD (in Rhetoric and Composition). He loves upvoting your comments but Disqus is broken and his upvotes don't "stick." Just assume he upvoted what you said, because it was excellent and witty.

Eligible #MAGA Bachelor Loves Trump, Long Walks On The Border Wall, And Bombing Clinics And Mosques. Swipe Right!

If the government won't force Muslims out, maybe private entrepreneurs like this dickhead will.

Steven Mnuchin Has Million-Dollar Military Jet Habit

He had some ethics, they were clouds in his coffee, clouds in his coffee.

Kris Kobach’s Top Expert Flagged Voters For Fraud Because They Were Named, Like, ‘Jose’

Who would have believed the voter fraud myth is based on incredibly dishonest statistics? Other than everyone.

Tucker Carlson Has Big Sad For Nazi Flakes Not Allowed Into U.K.

Rough times for white nationalists. Thank heavens Tucker Carlson cares.
Screw the cookies. I want the Foreign Relations Committee

Torture’s Back, So Liz Cheney Called Rand Paul A Terrorist Symp (UPDATED)

The asshole doesn't fall far from the tree.

Donald Trump Brags About Making Shit Up, Because Only Losers Need ‘Facts’

All politicians lie. Donald Trump lies about how awesome his lies are, because they're actually true. Which is a lie.

Look At Your Amazing Babies, America, Part Two: Electric Gun Control Boogaloo

Think it might be time for some hope.

Hey, About Those Armed Teachers: They Really Need To Stop Shooting Students.

Don't worry, these incidents don't count since Trump's plan hasn't yet gone into effect. Everyone will be just fine when it does.

Look At These Beautiful Children And Their Gun Control WALKOUT! LOOK AT THEM!

Now we adults need to live up to the example the kids have set.

Stephen Hawking Has Left The Universe

An appreciation

ICE Guy Done Working For Gestapo, Thank You

An ICE spokesguy just couldn't bring himself to lie. Odd job choice.

BREAKING: Trump Fires Everyone Who Ever Spoke Tillerson’s Name, Including YOU

Trump doesn't need any of this crap! Except for this paddle game...and this chair...

Is ‘Princess Black Sites’ Really The Best Person Trump Could Pick To Run The CIA?

You know who ELSE was a career civil servant respected by their peers?
The cross flag lapel pin is a nice touch.

Kris Kobach Shits Bed Again On Kansas Vote Trial’s Fourth Day. Really, Just All The Shit

Oh lord this man is an incompetent schmuck.

Stix Nix Dix After Lobbyist Kix, Pix

At least he kept his caucus in his pants. As far as we know.