Don't worry, we're only saying nice SHALLOW things.
Well, what else did you expect?
Also Jim Hoft, Stupidest Man On The Internet, will now be an official White House Correspondent.
Our Long National Nightmare Beginneth Today! Liveblogging Donald Trump’s Inauguration, Help Us Jesus
Come hang out with Wonkette today, it's safe here.
Trump's can't fill his cabinet, EVERYONE is protesting, Colbert says #ThanksObama! Your morning news brief!
We need all the help we can get to stop Trump, y'all. Let's not be total dicks!
No wonder Texas loons weren't going insane about this last year. It's a biennial event.
Remember that time Rick Perry enjoyed playing on the couch with Al Franken? Rick Perry remembers.
Well at least we'll all have the Kingdom of Heaven.
Remember how we'd laugh and laugh at the Weekly World News as we waited in line at the supermarket? That is our real news now.
It's a great movie, but not nearly cynical enough.
Maybe some bread and circuses, too.
At least Stalin put some effort into his staged photos. SAD! WEAK! PATHETIC!
Books: What have they ever done for us?
HOW IS THIS EVEN HAPPENING
All out of frothy jokes.
Park your butt down, we got us a livestream!
Look this good when 92 you are, you will not.
Trump's nominees get kicked around, Bernie Sanders is a fashion icon, and DC throws Mike Pence a big, gay dance party!
This is your OPEN THREAD, where you will cry at a Michelle Obama video.
This never would have happened under Jill Abramson.
President Obama used his last news conference ever to send Donald Trump a little message about how America works.