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Jesus "Steve King" Christ to the rescue!

Rep. Steve King has introduced a completely new and different bill to stop the Supreme Court from forcing gay marriage on these United States in June. It is called the “Restrain the Judges on Marriage Act of 2015,” and it would make a law that says, whoops, sorry, if a case has “G-A-Y” and “marriage” in the title, judges aren’t allowed to hear it:

“For too long, federal courts have overstepped their constitutionally limited duty to interpret the Constitution.” King said in a news release. “Rather, federal courts have perverted the Constitution to make law and create constitutional rights to things such as privacy, birth control, and abortion. These Unenumerated, so-called constitutionally-protected rights were not envisioned by our Founding Fathers.”

See, this little law would exercise the part of Article III of the Constitution that gives the Supreme Court and lower federal courts the right to hear any and all cases, “with such exceptions, and under such regulations as the Congress shall make.” So Steve King would like the Congress to make some regulations that take gay marriage away from the courts, because conservatives are very much in favor of “jurisdictional stripping” when courts are likely to rule in ways they do not care for.

Scott Lemieux explains at Lawyers, Guns & Money that there are indeed some constitutional problems with King’s “disgrace” of a bill, like, oh, the whole part about using jurisdictional stripping to target an entire class of people for discrimination. Lemieux gives us a history lesson and explains why King’s stupid bill is going nowhere:

Judicial authority has grown because members of Congress generally support judicial authority (which is one reason why King’s bill will be DOA even though a majority of members of the House presumably agree with its substantive ends.)

Take THAT, Congress! You gave the judges all the power, and now they are going to use it to gay up the nation! You made your gay judicial bed, now lie in it! So, is King’s bill constitutional? Maybe sorta kinda? Are they only doing this because they don’t want to let gay people marry whomever they want, even if they are gay? Definitely.

Now, astute readers might be thinking, waiiiiit a minute, wasn’t Ted Cruz just saying he wanted to do the same thing? Yes, he was! His was a little bit different though, because Cruz wants a full constitutional amendment, whereas King and the wingnuts who actually wrote this bill are pretty sure that’s not necessary.

Wait, the wingnuts who actually wrote the bill? Are we saying that King didn’t come up with this idea all by himself, in his tiny squirrel brain? Yes, we are! Right Wing Watch explains that this idea was cooked up by a veritable smegma pit of of lesser right-wing activists, who apparently have a direct line to lesser wingnuts like Rep. Steve King:

What is going unreported is fact that this bill is the result of a campaign backed by some of the most radical anti-gay activists operating today, including Peter LaBarbera, BarbWire, Vision America, Dr. Steve Hotze, and others.

The idea itself was the brainchild of Faith 2 Action’s Janet Porter, a longtime anti-gay activist who, just yesterday, warned that gay marriage was responsible for Noah’s flood.

And who’s to say that it wasn’t?! Certainly not yr Wonkette. Right Wing Watch points to an article written by Janet Porter, on Matt Barber’s Barbwire website, that esteemed publisher of hysterical anti-gay tirades and conspiracy theories. The headline of Porter’s piece says that “We Must Restrain The Judges!” and points to an activism website called Restrain The Judges Dot Com, where people can spend anywhere from $9.95 to $49.95 to send letters to Congress, telling them to Restrain The Judges! She also says in her article that they have somebody in Congress who’s really excited about making legislation happen to Restrain The Judges. WHO IS IT???

Oh, it is Steve King, with a Restrain The Judges bill. This will totally work, good luck!

[The Hill/Right Wing Watch / Think Progress]

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  • jesuswasablack
  • Nounverb911

    Isn’t there something something something about separation of powers?

    • Unforgotten

      Who cares? As long as G*d is on their side that stuff… what was it again?… is like… totally unnecessary.

      • Billy Rubin

        Something,, something. .. “and let God sort them out.” How does that go?

    • Gleem-McShinez

      Steve King says “The Founding Fathers meant Austin Powers, who was from Britain, who we separated from, DUH!!”

  • vivian

    “…federal courts have perverted the Constitution to make law and create constitutional rights to things such as privacy, birth control, and abortion. These Unenumerated, so-called constitutionally-protected rights were not envisioned by our Founding Fathers.”
    Unlike our friends the Corporations whose newfound rights are both inalienable and sacrosanct.

    • HogeyeGrex

      Steve King’s rights to stick his nose wherever he wants, including your bedroom, ban condom use and force all the wimminz to have his babbies are right there in the Constimatooshun.

      FFS, this twunt is butthurt over Griswold? Yeah, Steve. “I’m going to eliminate your right to privacy” sounds like a real electoral winner to me.

      Just wow.

  • Nounverb911

    When does King accuse the Supremes of having cantaloupes for brainz?

  • Lizzietish81

    BarbWire is anti gay?

    But her butler was so very swishy. Or was he just European?

    • Spotts1701

      Maybe he was on the down-low?

    • PubOption

      But the decrepit, dysfunctional America depicted is getting much closer.

  • memzilla

    Is anyone else so old that they remember when it was one’s patriotic duty to not act like a brainless, vindictive idjit, because how else will we defeat Godless Communism™ ?

    • Lizzietish81

      No, but then I was born in 81.

      • Unforgotten

        I do, but then those ******** just had to go broke and crumb their country into pieces and leave those right wings fellas without a purpose on life…
        Curse them!

    • Toomush_Infer

      Nope, sorry – I still remember the mold Ted Cruz was made from – McCarthy!…

  • exinkwretch

    Steve, Steve, Steve! Sure, this is gonna take care of the fags, but what about the wetbacks? Keep your eyes on the ball, son.

    • ManchuCandidate

      But he’s got his on the ballz… the gay ones anyway.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        They are all his eyes can see!

        Well, aside from those enticing cantaloupe sized calves, of course…

  • schmannity

    Time to defund the Supreme Court and shut down the government.

    • dslindc

      Now you’re talking Rafael’s language!

      • Toomush_Infer

        Will he be reading “Green Eggs and Ham” before the court? – ’cause I fell asleep before I found out how it turned out….

        • Blank Ron

          Something about sleeping with a pet Zeep?
          Though I might be thinking of ‘Fox in Socks.’ As I’ve been known to do.

  • dslindc

    Restrain the Judges? What if they aren’t into bondage?

    • Mintie

      I have a feeling RBG is more into tying up than being tied . . .

    • Gleem-McShinez

      You’d think Clarence Thomas would support it, just by looking at his porn collection.

    • PubOption

      50 shades of judicial black?

  • Callyson

    federal courts have perverted the Constitution to make law and create constitutional rights to things such as privacy, birth control, and abortion. These Unenumerated, so-called constitutionally-protected rights were not envisioned by our Founding Fathers.

    Guess again:

    Other anti-abortion groups such as the Family Research Council claim that abortion could not have had “foundation in the text of the Constitution”—overlooking the fact that when the Constitution was written, abortion was legal until quickening. Americans United for Life makes the same mistake on its website, misconstruing a quote from Thomas Jefferson—“The care of human life and happiness, and not their destruction, is the first and only legitimate object of good government”—as being anti-abortion. Americans United for Life also describes itself on its website as working to “restore a culture of life.” Of course, when the founding fathers met in a sweltering hall in Pennsylvania to declare independence, such a culture was not even a twinkle in their eyes.

    tl;dr: Steve King is full of shit again

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Cally, these people claim that the Archangel Gabriel hand (wing?) delivered the Constitution, on stone tablets, to Madison, Franklin, Adams, et al. They’re not going to let minor shit like historical fact get in the way of their fucked up authoritarian ideology that demands that sluts be punished for sexytime.

    • Biff52

      I’ve always had a different interpretation for the word “quickening”:

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Ate at Taco Bell again, huh?

  • ManchuCandidate

    The revenge of the anti-gay crusaders always end up sounding like this onion classic article.
    http://www.theonion.com/articles/why-do-all-these-homosexuals-keep-sucking-my-cock,10861/

    Why so angry, anti-gay trolls? Upset that the gay porn you angrily masturbated to has lost its allure?

    • Anarchy Pony

      Classic.

    • Blank Ron

      They just don’t want to share it with anyone.

  • elviouslyqueer

    Pfft, like the Constitution applies to those people anyway.

  • Callyson

    Janet Porter, a longtime anti-gay activist who, just yesterday, warned that gay marriage was responsible for Noah’s flood

    Wait–I thought it caused the drought in the Golden State? Sheesh, these wingnuts sure are indecisive…

    https://p.gr-assets.com/540×540/fit/hostedimages/1383069020/6371390.gif

    • elviouslyqueer

      We’re multi-talented that way. Hell, we even know how to make it start Raining Men.

      • jmk

        OT, but when I called my lawyer’s office to make an appointment to sign my divorce papers, the clerk put me on hold, and this was the song playing…

        Good times…

        • Lascauxcaveman

          Have a nice divorce! May it be your last one!

          • jmk

            Thank you!! It was a while ago, but the years since then have demonstrated that it was the right thing to do…not least because it let me meet my beloved, a dude so chill and right for me that, although we’ve been together for most of a decade, our next argument will be our first argument.

    • Zippy

      Where do you think they got all the water for the flood?

      • Blank Ron

        Hot dog, we have a wiener!

    • YayConspiracy

      flooding California with dryness.

    • Anarchy Pony

      I don’t recall God mentioning gay marriage to Noah…

      • Toomush_Infer

        What do you think he meant with “two of every kind?”…

        • JustPixelz

          But eight humans. Noah and his three sons and their wives.

          • Toomush_Infer

            And wouldn’t I have liked to been a fly in the corner as that third son (& wife) argued for a space: “There is too room! There’s plenty of room!”…

          • Amy!

            Aha!

            To be precise, one gay son (incestuously married to his bisexual brother), one bisexual son (incestuously and polygamously married to a bisexual polygamous wife and his own gay brother), one hetero son (married to a hetero woman), one unrelated gay woman polygamously married to the bisexual son’s bisexual wife.

            Two by twouhhh, three, in some cases, or arguably four, but at least two.

        • Blank Ron

          Maybe the ancient gheys were hanging out on the rock with those fabulous unicorns and missed the boat.

  • Belasaurius

    i’m sorry, “right to privacy” is a a false right?

    • OneYieldRegular

      Tell that to the “terrified-of-transgenders-in-our toilets” crowd.

      • Zippy

        I’m as open minded as anyone, but frankly I don’t want anyone in my toilet- it’s not a damned swimming pool

        • Biff52

          It’s not?

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      One of those rights that the founders thought were just too fucking obvious to write down (see: amendment, ninth), never thinking that anybody could be as blindingly stupid as Steve King.

      • Blank Ron

        The FFs had a pretty high opinion of people’s intelligence, I think. Perhaps it’s for the best that they don’t know what happened next.

        • Biel_ze_Bubba

          WIth the likes of Jefferson, Franklin, and Madison in the room, they probably did have an inaccurate notion of just how far away the other end of the bell curve was.
          Today, we have congressdolts straight out of the long, wrong tail of the distribution.

      • Blank Ron

        The FFs had a pretty high opinion of people’s intelligence, I think. Perhaps it’s for the best that they don’t know what happened next.

    • HogeyeGrex

      See, that’s the problem with America today. Too many rights.

      Actually, it’s just another fucking dog whistle.

    • HogeyeGrex

      See, that’s the problem with America today. Too many rights.

      Actually, it’s just another fucking dog whistle.

  • Toomush_Infer

    Other things not envisioned by our Founding Fathers: 1) that anyone would elect an idiot like Steve King to Congress…..(oh, you thought I was going to say the Internet and indoor plumbing?)….

    • Blank Ron

      Indoor plumbing has been around for quite a while. Look up ‘garderobe.’

      • Toomush_Infer

        Well, you caught me out on that one…

        • Blank Ron

          Though given how they were often used, I could see why they wouldn’t have been fans. cf Wenceslaus II of Poland.
          Who says Wonkette ain’t edjumacayshunal?

          • Toomush_Infer

            Not very civilized, then?…

          • Blank Ron

            I’ve always been of the opinion that inventive ways of dispatching other human beings were a sign of civilisation, but that just might be my cynicism showing.

      • mtn_philosoph

        That made me laugh so hard that I almost busted (up) a chiffarobe.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      They did anticipate the House would be full of idiots, that’s why the Senate was originally elected by the “wise heads” of the state legislatures. That only led to a more venal brand of idiot however, so the 17th amendment was adopted.

  • Manhattan123

    Marcus Bachmann and Lindsey Graham don’t know whether to laugh or cry. Or fellate.

    • elviouslyqueer

      AOI, K.

  • jesuswasablack

    “Restrain the Judges on Marriage Act of 2015,”

    Maybe he should just pass a law entitled “nothing gets fucking done unless Steve King and Jesus say so act of 2015 and forever”

    The urge for all these wing-nut anti-fags to fellate a large peen must be so massive, they just have to over compensate with “I hate fags” rhetoric, just go ahead and suck your buddy off already for Pete’s sake!

    • bikerlaureate

      Life would be simpler for Steve King if Steve King was king.

      • Blank Ron

        For us too. It would REALLY cut down the number of targets. For votes, of course.

      • willi0000000
      • Keith Rodgers

        I just had a cantaloupe. It was like calves.

    • bikerlaureate

      Life would be simpler for Steve King if Steve King was king.

  • Nothing says “conservatism” like trying to make radical changes to long-established processes and precedents.

    • willi0000000

      so sayeth conservative* chief justice john roberts.

      *until his confirmation hearings were over

  • OneYieldRegular

    Steve “One-L” King, you mean.

  • Enfant Terrible

    Dear Congressmember King,

    Rights do not have to be enumerated to be claimed by the people. This is a long-standing constitutional principle. For example, the right to enter into a contract is not explicitly mentioned in the Constitution, but has been affirmed by the U.S. Supreme Court numerous times.

    Sincerely,
    Your Friend,
    Best Regards,
    Cheerio,
    Fuck Off and Stay Fucked Off,
    Enfant Terrible

    • Unforgotten

      In other countries, the Constitutional Rights are the ones listed on their Constitution, as a result their Constitutions have like 400 articles (and counting).
      Right at the beggining of the XIX Century the SCOTUS ruled what you just said, and because of that the US Constitution is that thin.
      Guess King flunked hat class…

    • Unforgotten

      In other countries, the Constitutional Rights are the ones listed on their Constitution, as a result their Constitutions have like 400 articles (and counting).
      Right at the beggining of the XIX Century the SCOTUS ruled what you just said, and because of that the US Constitution is that thin.
      Guess King flunked hat class…

      • Villago Delenda Est

        One of several (thousand) that he flunked.

    • Meccalopolis

      black’s libel!!!

    • willi0000000

      Amendment IX.
      The enumeration in the Constitution of certain
      rights shall not be construed to deny or disparage
      others retained by the people.

      [read your constitution, steve]

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        He stopped reading at Amendment II. The rest are more what you’d call ‘suggestions.’

        • Amy!

          Skipped over to Amendment 10, rather. States’ rights forever!

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    Will King’s bill be DOA, or aborted?

    • Mehmeisterjr

      They’ll gay marry it to budget reconciliation.

    • riledupone

      It’ll be Godzwill either way.

  • Tallmutha

    I would say that gay marriage was as responsible as anything else was for Noah’s flood.

    • Mehmeisterjr

      So your thoery is that Noah’s Flood was caused by gay marriage, the Blue Bell ice cream recall and a number of other factors?

      • FauxAntocles

        Directional time and causality don’t mean much to the supernatural.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Also, too, the cancellation of Happy Days, the sinking of the Lusitania, and BOTH Defenestrations of Prague.

        • Thaumaturgist

          Defenestration of Prague?

          I’ll raise you there or four or five or six defenestrations of Washington.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Also, too, the cancellation of Happy Days, the sinking of the Lusitania, and BOTH Defenestrations of Prague.

    • OneYieldRegular

      I think Noah was responsible for Noah’s flood. He probably operated a zoo and wanted to eliminate the competition.

    • OneYieldRegular

      I think Noah was responsible for Noah’s flood. He probably operated a zoo and wanted to eliminate the competition.

    • Blank Ron

      That is, logically, 100% correct. And the RWNJs will never, ever figure out why.

  • Zippy

    The funny part is- of the two, Tamah Jada Clark actually makes more sense…

    • FauxAntocles

      Tamah for Congress!!!

      • OrdinaryJoe

        It is Florida

    • Fitzgerald Chesterfield

      Well, she spent a lot more time studying the history . . .

    • M H

      And she would have added a “TM” at the end of her bill, as a stylistic flourish.

  • JoeChristmas

    Clearly a backdoor attempt to stop the ghey.

  • HogeyeGrex

    Dear Rep. King,

    Amendment Nine: The enumeration in the Constitution, of certain rights, shall not be
    construed to deny or disparage others retained by the people.

    Now kindly fuck back off under your rock.

    Thanks,
    Everybody

    • Villago Delenda Est

      AND STAY THERE!

  • Anarchy Pony

    “so-called constitutionally-protected rights were not envisioned by our Founding Fathers”
    They’re dead.

    • Meccalopolis

      I keep reading that as ‘fondling fathers’

      ew

      • Toomush_Infer

        I think, in Steve King’s world, he means “Foundling Fathers”… it’s more religiousy that way…

        • Mehmeisterjr

          Maybe he means the pervy Fondling Fathers.

    • DFW_WTF

      Like allowing blahs and women the vote for example.

    • chicken thief

      So are Jesus and Ronald Reagan. Apparently they like them dead.

      • Blank Ron

        Dead people can’t say, ‘That’s not what I said!’

  • VirginiaLady

    But the out of control gun craze isn’t mentioned once. Not even the SCOTUS could touch that right!

  • wingr47

    Why aren’t the sane citizens killing these inhumane asses? Just WHO do they think they are. If I had My way I’d give them one chance to get their heads outta their asses or have that head cut off so they can’t reproduce again.

    • Toomush_Infer

      votes?…

  • Guest

    Our Founding Fathers did not even envision the internal combustion engine conveyances. There are a lot of things to which they were premature. That doesn’t make those things illegal, Steve.

    • JustPixelz

      Everybody knows Jesus wrote the Constitution so it is infallible. Except for the part about slavery. Jesus, he fucked that up.

      • nmmagyar

        Women voting – error on the part of the framers or error in the amendment?

    • nice_marmot

      Whatever, dude. God created Adam and Eve, not Adam and, uh, Steve’s Super-Gay Internal Combustion Homo Engine Factory.
      Yeah. So, go think on that for a while.

  • JustPixelz

    If King is right, Congress just needs to exempt all its legislation from review by the courts. … BWAHAHAHA. “If King is right!” HA HA HA. I slay me.

  • Me not sure

    What a sucker trap! Pay “$9.95 to $49.95” to send a letter to a Congresscritter? How do I start me one of those?

    • Blank Ron

      ‘Dear Shit-Fer-Brains’

      Oh, you mean the business.

      • Me not sure

        If by business you mean hard-core grifting, yes please.

  • diogenez

    Q: Who is dumber than Steve King?

    A: The people of Western Iowa who keep re-electing this motherfucker

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Well putting him in congress does limit the amount of time he spends in Western Iowa. So, there’s that to consider.

      • Land Shark

        That’s an Olde Tyme™ political party trick …. get them elected to higher office to get them the hell outta your local politics.

        • Latverian Diplomat

          IIRC the Vice Presidency or Theodore Roosevelt was an example of that trick backfiring spectacularly (in a bad way, for the party bosses).

          Fortunately, unless and until King becomes Speaker, we’re unlikely to see any side effect that dramatic in this case.

  • Gleem-McShinez

    Steve King’s Complete List of Things You Have To Destroy (in order to save):

    1. The Village
    2. The Constitution

    • willi0000000

      . . . and
      3. The Republic
      4. Democracy

      [i had something really witty to say but old age happened between starting to type and here]

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        5. The planet.

        I don’t actually know his position on climate change, but . . . oh fuck it, of course I do..

  • chicken thief

    Gay marriage caused Noah’s flood? So God, to rid the world of the homo buttsecks, wiped out everyone but Noah and his wife so they would have to have, or their kids would have to have, incestuous relations in order to repopulate the Earth?

    • Biff52

      Why not? It worked with Adam and Eve, right?

    • PubOption

      But Sodom and Gomorrah came after Noah and the flood, if I remember correctly.

      • Celtic_Gnome

        And Sodom and Gomorrah had nothing to do with the buttsechs, so God was evidently cool with that.

    • riledupone

      And we came back anyway.

      • chicken thief

        CRAMMING OUR THRO….. AGHHHHHH!!!!!!

  • chicken thief

    With this kind of batshit crazy floating around Capital Hill I don’t know how mah main man Louie Gohmert will ever get back in the news.

    • Toomush_Infer

      He’ll have to cast a lot of asperagus around…

      • Gleem-McShinez

        One man’s trash asparagus is another man’s treasure cantaloupe

        • willi0000000

          i cast ‘aspersions’ for +13 damage to your asparagus.

          • david green

            Nerd

    • Land Shark

      Your main man Louie is gonna have to up his game. His prezinitial ties aren’t enough to overcome this level of crazy.

  • Gleem-McShinez

    “For too long, federal courts have overstepped their constitutionally limited duty to interpret the Constitution.”

    He’s right!
    Bush v. Gore — Special “this time only” Supreme Court decision to stop the counting of votes
    Citizens United v. FEC — Overturning years of campaign finance laws in order to say “Money Is Speech”
    Burwell v. Hobby Lobby — Businesses can now cite “deeply-held religious beliefs,” instead of just being money-grubbing assholes, as reason to fuck over their workers

    Oh wait, that’s the kind of Judicial Activism / Overstepping that Steve King LIKES!

    • KenRob

      He’ll just have to add language to his bill that exempts all RW extremist judges from losing their rights to rule on Equal Marriage. They hate it too & disregard the Constitution in favor of their version of “Their Gawd’s” sharia laws.

  • OrdinaryJoe

    Fine. Leave it to the states. All that is then needed is four of five states to approve marriage equality and you will be getting the Constitutional provision about full faith and credit shoved up your slimy worthless ass so you will end up with recognizing gay marriage as a constitutional requirement.

  • Gleem-McShinez

    Gay marriage is responsible for The Flood, now?

    TIME TRAVEL OBAMA STRIKES AGAIN

    • nice_marmot

      I wonder if I could get him to go back to 1992 and tell me to invest heavily in mobile phone technology.

      • ThatDale

        Or help me override the objections of the PC-bigots in my wife’s investment group when I suggested they invest in Apple right after they released the first iPod.

    • willi0000000

      if gay marriage is responsible for Noah’s flood then it’s been legal for a loooooooooong time.

  • AmusedAmused

    So … I guess the bill, if passed, would invalidate Loving v. Virginia?

    • willi0000000

      that would seem to be the intent, yes.

  • Biff52

    You know what else wasn’t envisioned by our Founding Fathers?
    Repeating firearms. Telegraph. Telephone. Radio. Television. Aircraft. I could go on.

    • nice_marmot

      … handwashing, Mad-Cow Disease, Chicago deep dish, radioisotopes, Sharknado, Halle Berry.

      I’m not sure all those things really go together, but I wanted to help out.

      • Land Shark

        Halle Berry goes with everything.

    • ThatDale

      Non-property owners voting?

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      That’s all good stuff, and I assume they expected progress as a general proposition.
      What I’m sure they didn’t anticipate was superstition, ignorance, stupidity and regression on a large enough scale for slimeball fuckstick politicians to take advantage of.

  • nice_marmot

    Umm, would somebody please tell Steve that we really, really appreciate him trying to protect pizza and wedding cake from The Gay Agenda™, but right now there is literally no one keeping an eye on President Obama to make sure he’s not smuggling his vast army of gay Mexican ISIS recruits across the border.

  • TheBidenator

    I have a better idea, why don’t we exempt Steve King from writing or voting on legislation until he can pass a psychiatric competency test? What a nutbar….

    • toomanyrappers

      Only poor people and minorities should take competency tests to exercise basic rights that they should expect in their day to day lives. ;)

  • House0fTheBlueLights

    “gay marriage was responsible for Noah’s flood…And who’s to say that it wasn’t?!”

    Were you there?

    • willi0000000

      i’ll say it.

      [older than dirt . . . younger than rocks]

      • handyhippie65

        wait, i thought dirt was broken down rocks. so which is older, the rock, or the little bits that fall off? i was thinkin me and dirt shared a birthday, but now i’m not sure.

    • handyhippie65

      they have first hand, i witless accounts, so they didn’t have to be.

    • Querolous

      Bill was

      • Land Shark

        BiilO was reporting on the pillars of salt as well.

        • Querolous

          Bill shook hands with the snake.

          • david green

            I thought Bill WAs a snake…

  • Peripatetic Poltroon

    I’m looking at Article III and it looks to me like King can actually do what he says, assuming he can get 60 senators to agree. I’m no constitutional scholar; I don’t even play one on TV. Anyone know how much the exceptions clause has been used, and how far it’s been taken?

    • Latverian Diplomat

      It would also have to pass a Presidential veto.

      And there would be arguments about the constitutionality of it, which would ultimately be settled by the very Court whose power he is trying to limit.

      So, fat chance, basically.

      • Mehmeisterjr

        Ah but they could pass a bill taking away from the Supreme Court the power to decide the Constitutionality of the bill to take away the power to decide the Constitutionality of the previous bill. It would have to pass a Presidential veto. And there would be arguments about the constitutionality of it, which would ultimately be settled by the very Court whose power he is trying to limit.

        Ah but then they could do it over and over again, ad infinitum. Endless loops of meaningless futility is what this Congress does best, so why not do it again?

        • willi0000000

          see ACA, repeal of.

  • TootsStansbury

    “I, (name of Member), do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; that I take this obligation freely, without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion; and that I will well and faithfully discharge the duties of the office on which I am about to enter. So help me God” (5 U.S.C. §3331).*

    *”and I promise not to wipe my but with said Constitution.”

  • Blender_415

    Even Clarence will spit his coke all over his monitor when he reads this.

  • handyhippie65

    so, dickshit here doesn’t think we have a right to privacy? i can understand the other two wingnut positions, but i’ll bet he doesn’t want the government crawling up his ass. why is it ok for them to crawl up ours?

    • willi0000000

      because SHUTUP!!!!!

  • Paperless Tiger

    “They made the claim to all that he was mad:
    Some ghastly fear of “Noel’s flood” he had,”
    The Miller’s Tale, Geoffrey Chaucer.

    Republican behavior generally hearkens directly to the Middle Ages.

    • Wait, according to your Fomenkoist history, was Geoffrey Chaucer really an 18th century Russian?

  • Pseudonym

    If conservatives are so eager to strip jurisdiction from federal courts up to and including the Supremes, do you think we could get them to strip from them jurisdiction over King v. Burwell?

  • Mehmeisterjr

    ♫ The Lord said to Noah: there’s gonna be a floody, floody
    The Lord said it’s ’cause gehs are gonna get all buddy-buddy
    Change the laws. They is all so cruddy, cruddy, children of the Lord

    So pass a bill, if you got the quorum, quorum
    Go on Fox, they’ll give you a forum, forum
    Rise and shine, and give God Santorum, torum
    Children of the Lord. ♫

    • MrBlobfish

      I love the old time hymns.

      • Mehmeisterjr

        They work best when sung by Ned Flanders.

  • Steverino247

    Just another right wing fundraiser, folks. He knows this is going nowhere, but he gets to raise money off it, as do the various individuals and organizations that come up with this shit for him to introduce as legislation.

    • John Norris

      All the gay bashing by the Tea Party will also motivate them to vote in November 2016. It doesn’t matter who the Republican Tea Party presidential nominee is, only voting for every asshole Tea Party candidate for any office in every state and the nation can save America from God’s Wrath.
      OH yeah, Pres Clinton will take all the guns away the Pres Obama missed.

  • Poly_Ester

    Making it illegal for the Supreme Court to do its job! Why hasn’t anyone thought of the before? Pure genius, Steve, pure genius.

    • kirby76

      Well, actually they have; it’s been done before, as recently as 9 years ago (when Congress passed a law forbidding the courts to hear habeas corpus appeals from “enemy combatants”)

      Since this stupid and disgusting attempt of King’s is not going to pass I’m just not very emotional about it. The most interesting thing about the whole thing to me is that people are just now finding out about this obscure constitutional clause giving Congress the power to strip jurisdiction from the courts at will. I remember first learning about it in junior high school and finding it just as bizarre as others are now. But it’s in the constitution.

  • toomanyrappers

    Federal big gubment and more laws bad. Less laws and Constitution always good. Wait… whatdafaq?

  • Baby_Raptor

    The Founding Fathers didn’t want everyone having guns, people to not be slaves, huge corporations running the country, religion forced on everyone…

  • richardgrabman

    You need something in the US Constitution to cover “whatever we forgot” like there is in the Mexican one … “All discrimination motivated by ethnic or national origin, gender, age, handicaps,social condition, health, religion, opinions, preferences, marital status, or any other discrimination that violates human dignity and has the objective of restricting or diminishing the rights and liberties of persons is prohibited.

  • LoveSW_Prequels

    “Such as privacy” lolwut

    • eddi

      We need to examine your behavior on line for any contamination. You’ll thank us after we pray you straight again.

    • Interracial marriage was legalised on the basis of an implied right to privacy, as was sodomy.

      • LoveSW_Prequels

        I realize that, for him to imply that Privacy isn’t a right is absurd

  • DahBoner

    Rep. Steve King needs to fill out an application first…
    http://media.giphy.com/media/m7e07TZRV20Xm/giphy.gif

  • William Urmson

    This song goes out to all religious homophobic bigots everywhere. Please enjoy Gal-huh-Leo~ WJU

    http://www.reverbnation.com/williamjurmson/song/21365180-gal-huh-leo

  • Rick Hill

    Gay marriage led to the flood? Is there a way we can keep gays from marrying so we don’t have the flood that happened? Or something, I can’t make out where these folks are going with their line of argument.

  • Fly

    Steve King wants the judges to be as anal retentive as he is, even if it’s a messy diarrhea like himself. Go big or go home.

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