Old persons’ program 60 Minutes is about the only thing on the teevee that occasionally does journalism. So when the nation’s half-dozing seniors saw this report air last Sunday about how the representatives in Washington have turned the Halls of Congress into a Temple of Insider-Trading Whoredom, you knew there would be some serious upheaval, right? Ha ha, just kidding! All that’s happening is Joe Lieberman, winner of the Most Hated Man in Washington Award for 10 years running, is joining forces with unwanted teabagger Scott Brown, along with various other grandstanders who will have Bipartisan meetings to “probe” the situation they all know about and profit from.
This minor hullabaloo was started by a retired congressman named Brian Baird, apparently the only person in D.C. who ever cared that members of Congress use their confidential and closed-door meetings to gather super-secret Hot Stock Tips — which they then use to enrich themselves through insider trading! And it’s all perfectly legal! Oh, and then a former Sarah Palin aide, of all people, got angry and wrote a book about it with the awesome title Throw Them All Out. All of them.
According to wingnut newsletter and shopping guide Newsmax:
Baird’s STOCK (Stop Trading On Congressional Knowledge) Act failed to gain traction on Capitol Hill despite four attempts to introduce it. He never got more than six colleagues to sign on as co-sponsors and the bill went nowhere.
But now, leading Republicans like Sen. Scott Brown of Massachusetts, and Sen. Joe Lieberman, the Connecticut Independent, are throwing their weight behind the anti-insider trading fervor.
Well, we wouldn’t call it “fervor,” exactly. But it’s something.
Brown filed a bill to prohibit insider trading in Congress, and a key Senate committee has agreed to hold a public hearing on the measure.
The Massachusetts Republican’s bill would bar members or employees of Congress and the executive branch from using nonpublic information obtained through their public service for the purpose of investing for personal financial gain.
Wouldn’t that be nice? It won’t ever happen, of course, but at least we’ll have some “public hearings,” maybe, with Lieberman getting laughs for his cartoon character impressions and no one will say anything to offend/implicate their “good friends” in Congress and no bill will ever reach the floor. [CBS/Newsmax]
{ 105 comments }
Why am I not hearing about Eric Cantor's Failing America Fund here?
Here's an insider tip: I'm shorting Joementum.
Is that a naked short?
No, it's a spread — I'm long Amalgamated Bloviation on the other side.
Day trading on the Wonkette. Ken, did you know about this?
I salute you.
"Naked" and "Joementum" in the same thread? Now I know how the smiley face behind the elephant on Wall Street feels.
House Speaker John Boehner argues there are already guidelines for congressional investments, making a bill like this unnecessary…
"I have not made any decisions on day-to-day trading activities in my account and haven't for years," Boehner told reporters.
Week – to – week decisions, on the other hand…
I'm almost surprised he didn't go with the "these rules aren't working so we should abolish them" argument conservatives use when talking about campaign finance reform.
I defy any reporter to swear that that is exactly what Boehner said. I doubt any of them can translate his drunken, sobbing babble.
“probe” the situation – so Linsey will be involved in these meetings? Seriously though – Fuck off Joe Lieberman! You're a useless douche who should have quit when his constituents told you you were a fuckwad. Fuck off!
Joe Lieberman pretends to be human…and he's not very good at it.
Just like most members of Congress pretend to legislate.
I'll bet that Lieberman will discover that all of the politicians' trading activities were kosher.
It's a shame that Joe wasn't the first Jewish person to hold the Presidency in his hands. That would be Monica Lewinski.
That's hard to swallow.
True, it's a pretty flimsy basis on which to erect an argument.
So- you're saying that presidents are dicks?
Dick Nixon?
before he dicks you.
So THAT'S what Rose Mary Woods was reaching for!
I'm guessing that JoeMentum is backing this because he's so unpopular that he's not getting any insider information anymore.
I am shocked! Shocked, to learn that a member of Congress would even consider using their position of power for financial gain.
Did a congressional aide interrupt the interview and hand Joe a sack of cash?
"Your winnings, sir."
"position of power"
Pretty sure you're thinking of Grover Norquist or Rush Limbaugh when you talk about Congressional power. The actual members are just seat fillers for the wealth transfer award ceremony we call America.
Come now, this isn't necessary, it's not like we've ever had an entire executive branch invade and conquer another country for their own financial gain or anything.
Hey, leave William McKinley out of this!
That Baird guy, such a comedian!
Well he used to represent our beloved Soviet of Washington, so what would you expect?
Also, a stand-up guy.
Painfully indicative of just how lame our congress trolls are. Insider trading is so Nineteen Eighties. All the sharp kids are into credit default swaps now which is where you purchase loss insurance on a stock trade that you don't make for stock that doesn't exist from an insurance company that doesn't care. It's awesome.
Don't forget the best part: If you win, it's yours, but if you lose, it's other people's money.
And everybody has a share!
My name is Milo Minderbinder, sir. I am twenty-four years old.
What a coincidence. My mother's name was Elenora Rosanna also.
Some guys just get better-looking with age. Joe's not one of them.
Congress: where millionaires come to become billionaires.
Time to sell my stock in ham biscuits.
But not hobo beans. Their demand should skyrocket.
Sounds like it would have been a great "Curb Your Enthusiasm" episode.
It's hard to imagine politics without Joe. We'll still have Ben Nelson.
I am kind of expecting Nelson to caucus with the other team after getting the Democrats to save him in the next election. Or "pull a Lieberman".
But Ben Nelson doesn't follow Walnuts around, banging into Miss Lindsay every time McCain makes a sudden change of course.
leading Republicans like Sen. Scott Brown of Massachusetts, and Sen. Joe Lieberman
Oh, that's rich.
It's ok….they'll both be gone in about a year.
When did Lieberman get his name changed to "Zoidberg?"
But, what does this mean for Israel?
Andy Rooney libel!
Since we all know corporations are people wouldn’t this bill outlaw congress from interfacing with their constituents?
You know what would be deliciously, deliciously ironic? If, on the basis of such inside information, some Republican cunt invested his entire retirement savings in just one stock: Solyndra.
Oh, my yes.
Biely! You there? Remember that Deal you offered me? The "Faustus special"? Well, I'll take it, and in return I want what Mr. Owls describes above to be true.
I'd join you but the warranty just ran out on my soul.
Joe Lieberman should go back to sucking John McCain's balls on national television.
http://28.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l97ofi5WO51qaao...
Oh, come on….it's not like anyone is proposing Congress members should be required to put their investments in a blind trust like the president is.
Wait….why aren't they proposing that?
First one of them would have to propose it, right? Then they'd all be absent that day or something?
Granted, "Joe Lieberman" may not be the flashiest of alt-text choices DSF could have made, but hey, baby steps.
It's extremely meta-commentary. You want a joke? "Joe Lieberman" – there's your joke!
That's
sleepdeep.May I suggest: "In my dreams, someone likes me."
This is Senator Droopy's last "fuck you" to the democrats, giving Naked Senator some added cred as he gets ready to run against a real non-Wallstreetwalker.
if there's anything Droopy knows, it's how to get all "Peggy Pisspants" while doing some horseshit grandstanding. what a sloppy whorish whore.
I yield the remainder of my time to the Senator from Aetna.
It won't matter. She is gonna bury that poor termite.
I cannot trust anyone who can stuff a country into his jowls.
As a peon in the executive branch, I'm pretty sure it's already illegal for *me* to use information obtained in my official capacity or any other capacity, for that matter, to engage in insider trading. If I'm wrong about this, please let me know, as I could certainly use the money. I know, I know, it's the peon part that's controlling.
I imagine they had those rules when Bush was Pres. too. But enforcement was on the "honor system".
Like the one Penn State imposed on Jerry Sandusky.
If the opportunity presents itself please feel free to peon Sen. Droopy. Every chance you get.
Funny how Brown is going all Elizabeth Warren all of a sudden. Maybe he'll get a sex change next…
Joementum is going to find a way to sneak something about blowing up Iran into this.
Both of these jagoffs are going to have plenty of time to advocate on behalf of the common man, come next November.
"Brown filed a bill to prohibit insider trading in Congress."
Excuse me, but isn't insider trading itself an illegal act, regardless of where it is done?
Funny thing – a lot of the laws Congress passes are written in such a way that they don't actually apply to Congress.
You would think that, yes. But, you, know, it's the funniest thing. You'll never believe this, but there's a weird feature of those laws. Y'know, like the law in some town in Iowa forbidding people to chew garlic, or drink cherry cordial on a Sunday. Stuff that shows up in the syndicated newspaper columns with names like "It's a Wacky World".
Well, – you're going to split your sides laughing about this – if you look at the fine print, members of one particular body are exempted from the normal rules. Just like they've made themselves exempt from lots of labor laws, etc. Wacky, eh?
You brought her.
You inside her.
– L. Graham
But if Congress can't make inside deals, what incentive will they have to suck up to corporations?
Since corporations are people, Congress has the same incentive to suck up to them as they have to suck up to people. People who can contribute unlimited millions of dollars toward ads supporting their re-election.
Socialist!!
Thank goodness they've got Citizens United to fall back on.
Hope Joe shorted all his United Techmologies stock before signing on to this charade.
So how did Joe manage to tie insider trading in Conngress to bombing Iran?
Off topic but- driving down East west highway from Bethesda to Silver Spring, there was a car in front of me with U of Michigan/Go Blue/Wolverines stickers and a Washington University sticker AND a Herman Cain for President 2012. The driver was an old white/white haired man or woman(we pulled alongside but my daughter and I couldn't be sure of the sex). So was it a joke?
Hmmmm. U. of M., supports Herman Cain, light haired but completely indeterminate gender. Getting old….
Did Ann Coulter go to Washington University too?
Wow — Joe suddenly discovered financial accountability.
Old industrial political machines used to simply pay cash for votes, and this kind of corruption weakened democracy and allowed evil government activities to flourish. Joe knows this, he was the Attorney General of Connecticut. So the low simmering scandal – Joe Lieberman's failure to disclose $387,000 funneled through the petty cash account in campaign spending during the primary – is odd. That's almost a tenth of what he spent in the primary, and he's been hanging his hat onto the fact that the petty cash journal can be kept private.
Jesus fucking Christ, I have a weakness for Jewish men,Sami Frey is my ideal man, but this cunt is so fucking ugly.
I will gladly wear the Groucho nose and glasses, if that would help . . .
I'm often told how much I resemble Sami Frey, and if it weren't for the curse of internet anonymity I would readily demonstrate this fact to you.
Oh, shit, just remembered, I am circumsized!
In England we refer to the Civil War, as in Roundheads and Cavaliers, for circumsized or not.
But weren't the roundheads the puritans? Cromwell's crowd of stiff, 'there'll be no fun of any kind" bastards?
I thought Clinton was inside her.
is Bill a member of the Dick's Insider Savings Club?
fukkin rat ballchinian douche….
I guess i'm not contributing much to the general discourse with this comment but what evs. Honestly I don't even want to try and understand what this assmunch is going on about.
Note to DCCC: Scarf up the domain name "joelieberman.com" now before he's permanently disgraced and hits the comeback circuit.
Too bad Brown's bill only covers new stock purchases… I don't think it does anything about insider info on stocks they already own. That is how I understood it.
Well, hell, now that they got American's back on the job and that insufferably high unemployment has been reigned in, I guess they have nothing better to do than to ban things already banned.
jokes on them. john McCain married money first.
Scott Brown is a walking turd sitting in "the people's seat" that Ted Kennedy occupied for a billion years. The only reason he cares about "insider trading" can be articulated in two words: Elizabeth Warren. Warren is going stomp his ass and he knows it. There's a whiff of desperation in the air. He needs over 200,000 more votes than he got in the last special election. Good luck, Scotty.
Perhaps Joe could lend Scott some JoeMentum. It's trading at an all-time low here in Connecticut.
The test of this is whether Congressional stock investments outperform market averages. Now that I think of it, why not create a mutual fund based on where members of Congress are investing? Then we could all share the wealth that comes from their savvy investments.
Lonesome Joe Lieberman, United States Senator representing the great State of Israel and the Republican Party, in that order.
Joe, is what happens when being a Representative,or Senator becomes a Career. Without congressional term limits we have a system of institutionalized corruption,and apathy.
I couldn't agree more.
WAIT!!!!
Joe Lieberman is still alive???
Re: Insider Trades:
Well, fbi smugly murmurs, "everyone's doing it".
Must now see why congress refuses to investigate my charges of insider trading in derivatives by the fbi:
http://ttu.academia.edu/geralsosbee
Now, the rest of the story:
fbi, military intelligence (James Wolf), police, UT chancellor, UT legal counsel all team up to create a fraudulent police report with patently false contents in order to find a way to illegally arrest this fbi whistleblower. See this and related links:
http://www.sosbeevfbi.com/part19a-updatefo.html
QUESTIONS! geral sosbee (956)536-0439
One agency of government above all others must be destroyed:
the federal burro of investigation (fbi).
http://sosbeevfbi.ning.com/forum/topics/americans...
http://www.sosbeevfbi.com/oliverwendallhol.html
*Feinstein is one of the most treacherous traitors in congress.
* http://barbarahartwellvscia.blogspot.com/2011/03/...
BTW:
In the early years of the fbi Hoover discovered that his agents were generally not quite capable (for a number of reasons) to deal with the murderers and psychopaths of organized crime in the United States; so, Hoover and his associates set out to correct this inadequacy in a calculated and systematic manner: his agents when deemed appropriate would (by training and mind programming) become themselves homicidal sociopaths.
His plan worked so well that in today's fbi, one cannot always determine which agents (and operatives) are cold blooded murderers and torturers.For example:
People who knew H. Paul Rico (ex-fbi agent)"… recall him as a cop who dressed and talked like a gangster. Only much later would it become clear that it was not an act."
Hitman, Howie Carr, Tom Doherty Associates,LLC,175 Fifth Avenue, New York,NY 10010,2011, p.63.
http://sosbeevfbi.ning.com/forum/topics/war-on-te...
http://barbarahartwellvscia.blogspot.com/2011/10/...
http://www.sosbeevfbi.com/hooverletter.html
Joe, is nothing more than a turn coat . He is the Poster child for term limits. Why do we keep electing the same incompetent @ssholes that cannot do the job of the people?
Comments on this entry are closed.