International Women’s Day is a special holiday that began a century ago, because women were becoming more vocal in campaigning for progress — so this year’s version was marked by ladies showing their boobs at Mardi Gras and a new episode of Teen Mom 2. And it wouldn’t have been a Women’s Day party without the hottest woman alive — our fabulous FLOTUS, who celebrated in the best way possible. Michelle Obama had a big ol’ abortion party, because what do women even do, really, besides patronize the Sex and the City franchise and get abortions?
Michelle Obama joined her less-popular friend Secretary of State Hillary Clinton to honor some supposedly “courageous” women with the International Women of Courage Awards, which are probably boring trophies for women who aren’t smart enough to assault people on Facebook or pop out babies on the teevee, for money.
Secretary of State Hillary Clinton and First Lady Michelle Obama honored ten other women from around the world Tuesday with the International Women of Courage Awards, which are awarded by the State Department.
Marking International Women’s Day, Clinton welcomed eight honorees to the State Department, including Roze Otunbayeva, the president of the Kyrgyz Republic, the first head of state to receive this honor.
Recipients included members of government, lawyers, businesswomen, journalists and supporters of human rights from Afghanistan, Pakistan, Jordan, Cameroon, Hungary China and Mexico.
Yes, some of those people were there, but that doesn’t really matter because so was Planned Parenthood President Cecile Richards, who was so bold as to go on the Twitter and tell the world she was partying with our FLOTUS. How dare she.
Cecile Richards sent a message on Twitter on Tuesday afternoon that she was “Celebrating the 100th anniversary of International Women’s Day at the White House with First Lady Michelle Obama.”
Other abortion advocates joined Richards, according to another tweet saying, “And with two of my heroines for women — [pro-abortion] Congresswomen Debbie Wasserman Schultz and Nita Lowey — you are amazing.”
Le gasp! Michelle Obama’s plans for an East Wing abortion factory have been exposed. By next year’s International Women’s Day, every girl who stops at the White House for a super-fun abortion will get a gift bag of celery sticks and a free 1-hour Zumba session with Michelle. This has been 100 years in the making — blame Susan B. Anthony! [CBS/LifeNews]
Blair Burke (blairelinor@gmail.com) obsessively follows Michelle Obama’s every move for “The FLOTUS Files,” which appears every Monday here at your Wonkette.
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Don't think of it as an abortion. Think of it as donating blood and there just happened to be a blob in the batch. #winning
My conscience is now as clean as my womb!
Bill Clinton celebrated IWD by holding a Bunga Bunga party.
Look under your chairs everybody! You get an abortion! You get an abortion! Everybody gets an abortion!
Oh GREAT!
Who's gonna pay the taxes?
Well, it's about time someone brought some style and elan to abortion parties.
Horny bitches
Silvio Berlusconi likes International Women's Day.
Still, women only get one day a year, while men get the other 364 (365 every 4th year). That's progress at a glacial, if not tectonic, rate. Sigh.
Sure, the men hog most of the days. But if it makes you feel any better, there's a bar down the street from where I work that has a "Ladies' Nite" every week. So there's that.
The only problem with abortions is that they can't be retroactively performed on those who live only to make other people angry and/or miserable.
I'm looking at you, Fox News.
At my last Abortion Party, I served a lovely cocktail, with fabulous hors devours. Everybody said, "It was all that!" The little wieners in bottled Bar-B-Que sauce and grape jelly were a smash. The ladies all said they reminded them of their husbands. I hardly knew what they meant. They just adored the tortilla roll-ups. The way the tortilla folded back on itself, with all the super soft layers of delicious creaminess reminded the ladies of their own secret well of happiness.
Host a party. The free Hostess Gift and coupons for services are over the top. Contact Westboro Baptist Church to set up a party.
Excuse me while I whip this thing out! (Pant, pant)
Do fetus jars have a cash redemption value, or do they just go in with the rest of the recycleables?
Helpful hint: Baby donuts are a super dessert to serve at an Abortion Party.
Ugh, I'm so sick of these uppity feminazis pissing and moaning about stupid little things like the ubiquitous internalized discrimination against women in practically every level of every society on earth.
I know. You'd almost think they had something to complain about. Except Sarah Palin, of course.
Conservative women aren't feminists. They may want to take advantage of every door the feminist movement opened for them….but they're not feminists!
"I didn't ask you to open that door for me!!"
They often say that as they run for public office, manage businesses, assume high-ranking political positions, don't they? "I'm not a feminist..I worked for my Harvard degree! It's surely a coincidence that Harvard didn't admit women into undergraduate programs until the 1970's, when the women's movement was in full swing.
It's a shame the bourgeoisie no longer esteems the Mrs. degree. People like Bachmann, Palin, & Ginny Thomas deserve neither better, nor worse, nor more than that.
I expect to see a sign out front of the White House like the one that used to hang in front of Joe's Abortions back in the day :"You rape 'em, we scrape 'em".
'You screw 'em, we do 'em
No fetus can beat us!"
There, too, also.
Next to Joe's Garage
Ain't no party like an abortion party.
Oh the music will unseat us
and we'll dance upon our feet us
The GOP does seem a little hellbent on making sure that Obama doesn't get a second term and that all women are forced into a third term, whether they want to or not. Let's not invite these guys to our abortion parties. More seven layer dip for us!
Can I bring some vodka. I will drink, but I swear I will only have forceps.
If it weren't for vodka none of us would need to have an abortion party. Yeah, bring it! We can get more abortions next month.
It won't be long until the GOPhers accuse us gals of having two and three abortions a month each.
"It won't be long until the GOPhers accuse us gals of having two and three abortions a month each."
I personally love abortions so much, I have eight or nine a week. Then I make baby doughnuts, so I can be whorey AND fat.
"The GOP does seem a little hellbent on making sure that Obama doesn't get a second term and that all women are forced into a third term, whether they want to or not"
I bow to your superb wordplay.
I upfist you for your good taste, lol. Bear with me, I'm in a bad mood. : )
But has Roze Otunbayeva (greatest head of state name ever), president of the Kyrgyz Republic, ever seen the Kirgiz LIght?
Less filling, or great taste?
Wouldn't that be cool to have Roze Otunbayeve AND Boutros Boutros-Ghali at the same party. I would just walk around and introduce them to everyone and enjoy myself.
Sort of like when Letterman hosted the odious Oscar show: "Oprah? Ooma. Ooma? Oprah."
No, at her abortion parties, she serves dippers of koumiss and little slices of karta.
because what do women even do, really, besides patronize the Sex and the City franchise and get abortions
Eat chocolate, of course.
Patronize movies with absolutely no explosions in them. What's that all about?
Tell me, "Have you met my boyfriend Rocco? He's the big guy over there throwing that much smaller guy headfirst into the jukebox."
No mention of the mandatory witchcraft-lesbian sex-castration portion of the party? Typical liberal media.
Where's my invitation?
I see the pro-life news website could not resist the tired old label of "pro-abortion", even though I have never once met anyone who was pro-abortion.
Similarly, I've never met a pro-lifer who was actually pro-life.
You have evidently never met some of my former in-laws and co-workers; had you done so, I'm positive you'd wish they'd been aborted.
I hope the buffet for this gathering didn't come out of government funds.
Though, would be funny if, as follow-up to being a Congresscritter, Stupak were to have become a caterer & catered this abortion party. (I condemn thee, & withhold Communion, heathen!)
They outnumber male voters, own most of our net worth, are a majority of the general population and possess ALL the pussy! So, I ask again; why are men still running (read "ruining") America?
Except Oprah calls them Obortions.
I would like to upfist this for all eternity.
And I wasn't invited?! *fumes*
"Clinton welcomed eight honorees to the State Department, including Roze Otunbayeva, the president of the Kyrgyz Republic"? Maybe this was jointly sponsored by Toastmasters International. If so, Clinton should have given Michelle that one for practice.
AND rolling papers, dang!
Anyone else remember "Democrats want to use the federal government to get between people and their doctor!"?
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