THE KIND OF PEOPLE YOU HAVE TO SIT NEXT TO ON PLANES

January 12, 2011

Ben Quayle To Weird Out Barack Obama On Air Force One

by Jack Stuef 2:00 pm January 12, 2011

Ben Quayle gets Air Force One ride to Arizona from “worst president in history.”

Look who gets to go on the big-boy plane! There are few ways to bring more discomfort to the people of Arizona than forcing them to hug that wide-eyed toolbag. Ben Quayle is probably in the air right now, locating an old Snickers bar he left on the plane when his idiot father was in office and eating it in front of everyone to gross them out. [Halperin]

59 comments 2932 Views

{ 59 comments }

RedneckMuslin January 12, 2011 at 2:09 pm

Remember Barry, when you find gum up under the seats, the kid did it.

harry_palmer January 12, 2011 at 2:09 pm

He left a Snickers bar on the plane like the time he left a Baby Ruth in the pool. That was no candy bar.

JoeMamased January 12, 2011 at 2:11 pm

But he has to pay for in-flight beverage service, right?

CZL January 12, 2011 at 2:48 pm: No. Potatoe liquor is free.

freakishlywrong January 12, 2011 at 2:12 pm

Let's hope there's some turbulence and Ben gets the hell knocked out of him.

edgydrifter January 12, 2011 at 2:12 pm

Ben Quayle is probably wandering around the fuselage right now, asking ladies from the press corps to smell his finger.

johnnymeatworth January 12, 2011 at 2:14 pm

He'll be in his carrier down with the luggage.

SayItWithWookies January 12, 2011 at 2:16 pm

That explains why they were loading up the plane this morning with a high chair and several bottles of Gerber's products.

chascates January 12, 2011 at 2:16 pm

And where's John McCain?

SNUBBED AGAIN!!!!

Zvi_Bleindmeis January 12, 2011 at 3:39 pm

THAT'S NOT THE POLICY!

trampndirtdown January 13, 2011 at 9:21 am: Oh but it is the policy so suck it McCain.

Rarian Rakista January 13, 2011 at 1:49 am

He flew there in one of his many flying houses.

Negropolis January 14, 2011 at 12:55 am: He better be sure to steer clear of Sarah Palin, then, 'cause houses are wont to comically fall on top of witches.

What? Too soon?

Progressiveinga January 12, 2011 at 2:23 pm

If I were Baby Ben, I'd be more afraid of FLOTUS than her husband. Michelle don't play.

Negropolis January 13, 2011 at 5:07 am: No kidding. Michelle will cut a bitch if she's forced to.

nounverb911 January 12, 2011 at 2:23 pm

Hey Ben, don't eat the green M&M's!

Limeylizzie January 12, 2011 at 2:24 pm

Maybe they will make him wear a nice little "Air Hostess' outfit , circa 1963, complete with stiletto heels and slap his bony arse as he serves drinks.

DashboardBuddha January 12, 2011 at 5:51 pm

That sounds like a fun little dress-up game.

Limeylizzie January 12, 2011 at 9:22 pm

I am all about the dress-up games, as well you know.

DashboardBuddha January 12, 2011 at 10:07 pm: It's the knowing of that that keeps me warm at night.

SorosBot January 12, 2011 at 2:24 pm

Hopefully the dinner will include a baked potatoe.

LocalGirlMakesGoo January 12, 2011 at 2:40 pm

I glad-fisted you for that one, even though I laughed so hard I morning-sicknessed through my nose.

Crank_Tango January 12, 2011 at 5:52 pm

is that what you count as "making goo"?

Rarian Rakista January 13, 2011 at 1:51 am

Are you implying that Sorobot has the ability to impregnate through the Internet, is that what the tubes are for?

LocalGirlMakesGoo January 13, 2011 at 11:02 am

I wasn't implying anything of the sort. SorosBot simply has the ability to make barf come out of my nose. He's that funny.

SorosBot January 13, 2011 at 2:42 pm: Well thank you.

Come here a minute January 12, 2011 at 2:24 pm

This is exactly the type of person for whom the enhanced patdown was designed.

EdFlintstone January 12, 2011 at 2:28 pm

Sure Ben, we have a seat for ya, it's the crate next to Bo's

BerkeleyBear January 12, 2011 at 3:02 pm

I thought it was Bo's crate – after he got done leaving a few "presents" for Ben.

EdFlintstone January 12, 2011 at 3:45 pm: Or its a long flight so we left you extra newspaper.

horsedreamer_1 January 12, 2011 at 2:28 pm

Watch him make a Gingrichian claim of having to ride in the back.

That will be the reason for the 2011 Government Shut-down.

MinAgain January 12, 2011 at 2:36 pm

I hope he brought a parachute.

freakishlywrong January 12, 2011 at 2:36 pm

The worst President it History? Barry, get off the plane! Dubya's aboard! Hurry Barry!

ManchuCandidate January 12, 2011 at 2:36 pm

I thought W was flying on AF1

notreelyhelping January 12, 2011 at 2:46 pm

To be there for the moment Obama wanders back to say hi to him and flashes that "I'm about to put on my shades" smile. "Nice to see you, Brian."

SorosBot January 12, 2011 at 2:51 pm

Did Ben bring along someone else's kids to pass as his own? Maybe try and claim Sasha and Malia were his daughters?

Guppy06 January 12, 2011 at 2:52 pm

"There are few ways to bring more discomfort to the people of Arizona than forcing them to hug that wide-eyed toolbag."

Democracy gives you the government you deserve.

undeterredbyreality January 12, 2011 at 3:01 pm

"Umm, hello Mr. President, sir. I'd like to apologize for that comment. You understand–politics and all. Heck, my dad wrote it–I just read it. Didn't mean anything by it. Thanks for the ride. Really, I love you–think you're the greatest. I do. Oh, hello Mrs. President, nice to meet you. OW! OW! Not my new Spongebob underwear!"

DashboardBuddha January 12, 2011 at 5:49 pm: The image of Obama giving Quayle a swirly made me smile.

hagajim January 12, 2011 at 3:20 pm

Just goes to show you that Barry is a class act – unlike most of the turdballs on the other side. Of course, Michelle could be stuffing a big ol' baker up his ass about now too….

yellowerdog January 12, 2011 at 3:21 pm

Instead of the flight jacket, he gets the 'I got to ride on Air Force One and all I got was this WORST TEESHIRT IN HISTORY'

CrankyLttlCamperette January 12, 2011 at 4:09 pm

What a whore. Can't fly coach?

Extemporanus January 12, 2011 at 4:14 pm

"PRESIDENT FLIES VIRGIN"

ifthethunderdontgetya January 12, 2011 at 9:19 pm: I gave that one a thumbs-up at work, and now I can give it another on the home laptop.

Cause I'm one of them ACORN vote cheaters like you read about.
~

ttommyunger January 12, 2011 at 4:25 pm

Ben Quayle, proudly carrying the Alfred E. Newman Banner since Dubya left office…"What, me worry?" I wonder, does he have to wear his helmet all the time or just when he's out of his room?

102415 January 12, 2011 at 5:29 pm

What did they ever do with Marilyn Quayle?

DashboardBuddha January 12, 2011 at 5:53 pm

So, Ben…do you like movies about gladiators…have you ever been to a Turkish prison?

DonnyKerabotsos January 12, 2011 at 7:10 pm

Just as long as they don't bring him back.

finallyhappy January 12, 2011 at 7:43 pm

I love his music though- Penny on the tracks is a fine video too

Tommmcatt January 12, 2011 at 7:55 pm

You know what's weird? This article didn't appear in the main body of the site…only on the crawl at the side.

Just thought the overlords would like to know.

Katydid January 13, 2011 at 9:52 am: I think that happens to stories that don't have a lot of comments. Not sure, though. I know that doesn't happen on my iPhone, all the stories appear in order in the mobile app.

transfatz January 12, 2011 at 11:53 pm

I hope he enjoys his seat in unpressurized class.

Negropolis January 14, 2011 at 12:53 am: That's like the nautical version of steerage, right? Quayle is of Irish extraction, right?

It's all starting to make sense. A historic re-enactment.

bumfug January 13, 2011 at 12:52 am