Huzzah! The Washington Post Op-Ed page is relevant again, to Harry Reid! This makes up for the loss of journalistimistical champions Woodward and Bernstein and also legendary tablecloth-reviewer Sally Quinn. (Oh wait, she has a blog! This is what happens, when you are an alleged former mistress and confirmed lifelong dingbat; you get to write a blog about Jesus.)
Anyway. Harry was kicking it as per usual, just thinkin’ about magical underpants and golden tablets that never existed, when all of a sudden he or his aide stumbled upon Michael Gerson’s WaPo column on what a pussy pusbag Lindsey “Mean Girls” Graham has been lately, trying to deny citizenship to little brown babies (and white ones too, oops!) whose mommies and daddies were born in Pooristan or Suxico. And this column made Harry feel strange and, you know, angry. But in a good way? And also validated? And so he decided to share it with a crowd of humans, during Storytime with Unca Harry.
Your Talking Points Memo sez he read aloud the following passage from the Gerson piece:
The authors of the Fourteenth Amendment guaranteed citizenship to all people “born or naturalized in the United States” for a reason. They wished to directly repudiate the Dred Scott decision, which said that citizenship could be granted or denied by political caprice.
They purposely chose an objective standard of citizenship — birth — that was not subject to politics. Reconstruction leaders established a firm, sound principle: To be an American citizen, you don’t have to please a majority, you just have to be born here.
In terms of poetic and cultural significance, Harry Reid quoting Michael Gerson is the same as Black Star sampling Gil Scott-Heron and Brian Jackson on “Brown Skin Lady.” It is also the same as whenever Jesus quoted God, which if you’re Catholic was every single time he opened his mouth (THINK ABOUT IT).
So after he finished regurgitating Gerson, Harry laid down the smack on Republicans thusly: “They’ve either taken leave of their senses or their principles.”
Obviously, the only thing left to do was throw down the mic, flip the double bird at the crowd, and disappear into a cloud of smoke generated by the earthly incarnation of Brigham Young’s ghostly corncob pipe. And that’s exactly what Harry Reid did. [TPM]







{ 34 comments }
With his pants on the ground.
“Harry laid down the smack on Republicans thusly: “They’ve either taken leave of their senses or their principles.”
Next Harry Reid hit, “Can’t Leave Whatcha Never Had.”
Your Black Star reference hardens my nipples. And for those thinking about visiting Suxico, their bologny tacos are the bomb.
It is impressive that this stalwart of Senatorial inaction with tens of millions of dollars in the bank is leading a complete fucking insane lady by 2 points.
Next, Harry Reid will be giving David Broder a noogie.
The “THINK ABOUT IT” link points to a picture of Trinity on a Matrix website. Wazzup wit that?
This fight over the 14th amendment confirms that Teabaggers are deep down little boys/girls in (many cases, very) big boy/girl pants.
They’re for something till it benefits someone they hate and then they’re aggin it.
Weren’t a lot of these spoiled fatasses part of the “groundswell” to repeal the 14th so as to allow some fake hero Austrian born muscle head with delusions of grandeur to run for preznit?
Funny that folks who seem to have a fetish thing for the Constitution are so eager to change a part of it.
Reid now 4 points ahead of Angle and pulling away. If he can keep his mouth shut. Just stay quiet, Harry. They picked the only person in Nevada that can’t beat you.
I just realized one thing. Sara, your blingee makes Harry Reid look like Burgess Meredith playing the Penguin.
Waahwahwahwahawah…
Harry’s been working with the Senate Republicans for years now; it shouldn’t have have taken him this long to learn that have taken leave of their senses and have no principles to lose.
Harry, Republicans have neither principals nor sense. They are oily elephants consumed with hatred.
[re=631665]Sgt. Biyatch[/re]: You’re not up on your Thomas Aquinas? Summa Theologica, great read. Jesus is the word made flesh, part of the trinity that includes God and the Holy Ghost, ergo, when he opened his mouth thus spoke the lord. But even if you believe that, question is was he quoted correctly, for this we have “divine inspiration” to assist the writers, then we get to interpretation, and we’ve gone way down the rabbit hole with Leo ala Inception “I put a dream in your dream in your dream so you can dream while you’re dreaming” and what not. And some how love your neighbor comes out as Fags go to hell, lost in translation I guess.
isn’t the 14th amendment an example of citizenship being “granted or denied by political caprice”? the capricious in this case being the victors of the civil war. war as politics by another means, political power flowing from the barrel of a gun, all that stuff.
OMFG! Did the mouth that has spewed more cream of wheat and pablum than Nabisco actually throw a rhetorical right cross? Did Harry grow a pair deep down in hiz magic undies?
No, that cannot be so. The Sara, she is pushing our leg.
Sara, I think you’re burying the lede – the remarkable thing here is that *Michael Gerson wrote a reasonable column.* I, for one, am honestly a little shocked.
[re=631674]red sky[/re]: And some how love your neighbor comes out as love your neighbor unless they’re Fags, who will automatically go to hell, or at least that’s what my priest, who’s presently fucking an 11-year-old altar boy, told me.
There. Fixed that for ya.
Complete tangent:
Buttsex.
[re=631674]red sky[/re]: Wow that was quite an “summation”. I’m not exactly erudite when it comes to religion. Or book learning. So from Inception -> Matrix -> Trinity -> Thomas Aquinas -> Jesus -> Word of God -> Gays go to hell. Makes sense. Also, I think Keanu is gay when the mood strikes, so it forms a kind of feedback loop.
It’s probably okay to go ahead and repeal the 14th while Whitey can, because in about 30 years, the new majority non-Whiteys are gonna reenact that 3/5 vote thing, but apply it to you-know-who.
The GOP is all about the upholding the Constitution — except Amendments 1, 3-9 and 12-26. But everything else is sacred, SACRED!!!
Talk about a season of race baiting! I’m sure the “debate” over whether to repeal one of the Reconstruction Amendments would go over well and show once and for all that the Republican Party is NOT RACIST. After all, they’re the Party of Lincoln. Right?
Vote Republican so that the descendants of freed slaves shall not be citizens.
Wow. I hope they don’t blow their entire TV ad budget on that one.
Jesus, is he lucky the Republicans nominated an imbecile to run against him.
How about a compromise, we just repeal 3/5ths of the 14th amendment?
[re=631733]comicbookguy[/re]: Actually, this really a clever way for the Republicans to get rid of Michael Steele. They don’t give a rat’s ass if it takes down 40 million other people.
“They wished to directly repudiate the Dred Scott decision…”
Don’t you mean ‘refudiate’, lie-beral?
The whole Harry Reid/Michael Gerson campfire story thing, compounded by Harry actually seeming to have an embedded spine requires way too much suspension of disbelief for my taste. I call bullshit!
[re=631664]norbizness[/re]: …is leading a complete fucking insane lady by 2 points.
Insane? Well, harumph! Does this sound “insane”:
Angle: Reid Agenda Is ‘A Violation Of The First Commandment’?
Well, maybe it is a bit … uh… crazy. But I’m sure her words were out of context. or something. Because that’s fucking insane!.
Where was Harry Reid when Tupac was shot?
[re=631664]norbizness[/re]: wtf is that supposed to mean? And how exactly do you conclude ‘stalwart of senate inaction’ after he just completed 18months of the most progressive legislative achievements since the great depression? This while being faced with having been lefte with unparalleled problems from the previous admin. And also while facing the most obstructionism (quantitatively the most filibusters in the entire history if the senate).
So please, explain this insane statement of yours!
Reading the Washington Post has gone on the list with chewing tobacco, shooting nineball with strangers and painkillers for breakfast. It is an outdated ritual that at its zenith was the province of minor league baseball players, parked exurban housewives and inventors of patent medicines. It is the intellectual equivalent of shooting craps with Big Julie.
[re=631665]Sgt. Biyatch[/re]: Haha, I am redonkulus. Catholics believe in the Trinity, which says that Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are separate but also all one.
[re=631949]Sara Benincasa[/re]: I always thought “et filii” meant “and baby horse”, but your explanation makes better sense.
Catholics also believe in transubstantiation, which is weird and gross if true. Otherwise, it’s just ridicurous (I’m half Asian).
WHERE IS JUSTIN BIEBER IN THAT BLINGEE
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