Wonkette
An historic thing happened this weekend, a first-time ever event that served as an example to millions of Americans who have ever felt down or out! We refer, of course, not to the Saints winning the Super Bowl, but Sarah Palin actually showing up for an event that she headlined. (Historically minded Palin watchers will recall that she has basically never done this before, preferring instead to bag at the last minute and send out poor Meg Stapleton to issue a statement saying “We have never even heard of this event that she just bagged on.”)
Anyway, here is her speech, which we did not liveblog because come on, we had meth to cook on Saturday.
In the speech she made fun of Obama for using a teleprompter while reading off her teleprompter and then used notes she had written on her hand to answer questions.
Telepalmer.
retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard
Bravo, Sarah, you didn’t quit in the middle of the talk!
I said it before and I’ll say it again:
This may be immature but: Christ, I hate that cunt.
I’m not watching that video unless someone tells me a guy in a kilt runs up on stage and and tries to kiss her.
Are you trying to give me a heart attack? I just drove an hour and a half
through an a.m. rush hour/snow storm to work and now you want me to watch
40 minutes of Queen AlsoToo? God Wonkette, you are so mean!
can you post the abridged version?
Oh wait, never mind, I know the abridged version:
tax cuts, death panels, drill baby, birf certifikate, also, too.
Woodwards Friend: Needs more “fucking retard”.
Woodwards Friend: I second that.
Was it worth $100,000? I’d say no, but then, not being a teabagger, I don’t pretend to find her attractive despite her overwhelming stupidity.
Pop Socket: But Obama is supposed to be sooooo smart. Her followers know that Sarah is a Retard. That’s why they lover her so.
Not ready for prime time.
Can Screechy melt snow with that voice? I already have a paint scraper, thank you.
Gaylord
bhosp: retarded cunt…the correct term is “retarded cunt”
Pop Socket:
Apparently irony and hypocrisy are not in the conservative dictionary.
I agree that the Internet should be free from all restrictions and controls, but if this website insists on posting anything of the nature of a full Palin speech, some non-government warnings should be attached. I fear for my fellow patriots. Viewing more than 10 seconds of a Palin speech does immediate and permanent damage to the logic center of a human brain (one tries to follow a line of logic while listening, and the contradiction in that begins the process of brain cell degredation). After all, a mind is a terrible thing to waste…and in Palin’s case, not having a rational mind is a terrible thing to display.
Oh, and by the way, she is certainly a retard. Hey Sarah, how’s that inky-handy thingy working for you, you stupid fuck.
She’ll bail on her latest enterprise to become the spokesman for her new Palm Pilot invention. Little does she know that it has already been patented by a West Virginian.
“Positioning herself for a run in 2012″ was the comment on the interview she gave (with someone?) before the speech. Please Santa! I’ll be good the whole rest of the year (not really)!
The Taint Lady made it to the Teabagger’s Ball. I don’t see any writng on her hands.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B1nc4HXMzo4
Never overestimate the intelligence of the US voter. In my lifetime, from Stevenson v. Eisenhower until Bush v. Gore or Kerry, the less intelligent has repeatedly won, the current situation notwithstanding and with the other possible exception of Kennedy. Sarah Palin is about as stupid as Dubya and look what he managed to do. Let’s face it, the average voter is just average smart.
Maybe it’s the light, but she looks kind of old in that video. Proof that demons drop their disguises when in their lair.
snideinplainsight: Rump in the air, hands on the track, feet at seven and two. Wiggle rump.
When the “elite” (i.e., the non-retard population of the United States) criticizes Palin for the writing on her hand (and even looking at the hand–what a retard!) stunt, her True Believers (i.e., the retarded population of the United States) will get angry and take it as a personal attack. Because, they do the same thing on their hands which proves “Sarah is one of us” in their untrainable minds. The more we attack her, the closer the bond between the retards becomes.
There goes the Bell Curve…
Writing notes in the palm of her hand. At least we know how she made it through college now.
Woodwards Friend: You’re quite the satirist.
Advocatus_Diaboli: the abridged version was written on her hand.
JMP: Even rich white meth queens with retarded kids need welfare.
Me Palinese, me play joke, me put words on my hand.
I actually considered watching this until I saw the length. It’s not worth the potential mental damage.
I am so glad to be American. Thank you. Gosh, also
Where is the demon sheep when you need them?
Cuntard.
Sorry, Sara, didn’t listen. That’s your job.
Woodwards Friend: Thirded. Also, needs more “fucking” and dancing penis bananas.
I’m looking forward to President Palin taking questions from the Democratic caucus. “Yes, Congressman Frank, your dining room table makes a good point.”
“How’s that hopey-changey stuff working out for ya?,”
just great you twit.
I paid $2000 less in taxes this past year.
Youtube muted, Benny Hill themesong on, … remarkably improved & more informative.
Hey eds, did you know (true fact!) that Dakar, Senegal is a twin city with DC? What’s the weather like this morning in Dakar I wonder?
TD;DL Too Dumb; Didn’t listen.
The speech is short
But it’s the most rousing speech
I’ve ever read.
It’s been worked on here and in Russia,
on and off, for over eight years.
I’m telling you, the Republican primary is going to be an endless stream of comedy if she runs.
Only 600 people attended the entire convention and about 1,000 attended the “speech” by Bible Spice. This is not a movement, it’s a small band of wingnuts with a crush on a lame celebrity. To put it in perspective: 2,000 people attended a dance performance featuring garbage trucks here in Austin last fall. Outside! In the rain! Sweet weeping Jeebus on a stick! Only 600 people attended Her Shrillness’ speech and the national media is ON IT. Tempest in a teapot much?
And really, 40 minutes?! It will take me a looooonnnnngggg time to muster the self-loathing required to watch and listen to this dreck. Also!!!!1!!!!
Minnie Mean: My prediction – Within five years she’ll be writin’ this on her palm: 2 scram bac WW toast OJ.
…and she’ll still get the order wrong, but there’ll be a big tip as thanks for the cleavage shot when she serves it..
Minnie Mean: Yep, more people attend Eeyore’s birthday party, Spamarama and the hot sauce festival every year.
Cape Clod: It looks like we’ll have at the very least Palin, Santorum and Huckabee, each one trying to out-stupid the others; Mitt Romney’s likely to be the smart one, so the level of retardation should be amazing. Hopefully, one will say they still believe that the Sun goes around the Earth, then another will try to top that by stating they believe in a flat Earth.
I’d demand my $100K back, or at least a deep discount for her being an unprofessional cuntbag.
Minnie Mean: The numbers do tell a story, don’t they? I went to the local amateur symphony Sat night and was part of a crowd of about 800. This is in a town of about 20,000.
FlownOver: I love breakfast
Translation from Palinese, please:
“…the former governor went to great and sometimes awkward lengths to insist that when conservative talk show host Rush Limbaugh used the same exact term [retard] to describe the same exact group, it was simply in the role of political humorist.
‘They are kooks, so I agree with Rush Limbaugh,’ she said, when read a quote of Limbaugh calling liberal groups “retards.” ‘Rush Limbaugh was using satire … . I didn’t hear Rush Limbaugh calling a group of people whom he did not agree with “f-ing retards,” and we did know that Rahm Emanuel, as has been reported, did say that. There is a big difference there.’”
Hardly a retard. More like a genius in the mode of PT Barnum. More money from her PAC has gone towards buying her books (and bookmarks?)* than toward supporting candidates. And she promised her 100K would go “to the cause,” so I can only assume she means more of her “Going Khmer Rouge” books.
*from the authoritative source of Wait Wait, Don’t Tell Me
Good news! Palin thinks it was okay for Rush to use the retard because he is a political satirist (WTF?). That means it’s cool if we do it. Personally, I was worried there’d be a million ‘Tard March on Wonkette…..but then there’s only ~700K people in Alaska.
SP is kind of like Danica Patrick. Hasn’t really done anything, most likely won’t.
Its time to show the TITS ladies.
How are there no jokes about the writing on the hand in this post? You had a day to come up with them!
WONKETTE FAIL
I wish that Dana Milbank variety show was still being produced….
Let me summarize that speech: Jesus says “fuck you”.
Advocatus_Diaboli: drill, retard baby, drill!
I picking up a theme, here on Wonkette. Starting with yesterday’s snow video and with Sara’s speech as the second installment.
Welcome to Insanely Long Boring and Pointless Videos Week, Wonketteers!
What was written on the right hand
I’m thinkin’
Milk
Butter
Eggs
And it brings great meaning to that expression, “on the other hand’
It’s amazing to see a highly functioning trainable being so successful. This goes to show that people with intellectual limitations are more than just an r-word! Now stop being so insensitive, you gang of retards.
Thanks for compiling a video of Sarah Palin’s best bloopers and blunders! Wait, that was one speech?
HAHAHA. Seriously, this shit just writes itself.
V572625694: It’s very simple, really. What she was really saying was, “I don’t really give a shit about anyone saying “retarded” but like to be able to feign offense as a political cudgel against Democrats, just as I have accused critics of misogyny, whether their criticism was actually misogynist or not, despite being a hardcore anti-feminist myself.”
gurukalehuru: You gotta hand it to her though; has anybody ever gone so far with so little talent and ability? You think “Dohbya” but even he got this joke.
Palin: degenerate Reagan/Bush/Cheney, like the final weak, nasty cup that misers brew from a dried up teabag. “Menopausal Teabag,” anybody? Anybody?
The Ross Perot of 2012, also, too? Let’s hope she soaks up lots and lots and lots - container loads! - of wingnut cash, spends it on her boxes on various lake shores, and continues performances that excruciate more earnest Republicans and make them writhe with agony at the thought of being associated with her.
queeraselvis v 2.0: “He walks the walk of a true conservative. And he sticks by his guns – and you know how I feel about guns,” she said.
Why, that filthy harlot! She’s gonna sleep her way through the GOP.
bend: Hey, a day that has to be spent shoveling a metric fuckload of snow is not conducive to writing jokes. Nor is the soreness the day after. (Ow, my back!)
V572625694: You don’t call retarded people retarded, it’s bad taste. You call your friends retards when they’re acting retarded.
The difference between this event and the ones she cancels at the last minutue: this event paid her $100,000. Palin has never missed an event where she was paid to attend and spend 15 minutes reading a speach written by someone else.
Terry: I’m glad your ebonics works
Bowdoin: You may be too young to remember, but there was a certain untalented B-movie actor turned politician who appealed to the dumb and racist who went further than Palin. And we’re still paying for that one.
Ducksworthy: Precisely. Why do the dumb outliers hang out with others of their sort? Because it validates ‘em. “We choose to be ignorant morans!” So joyous for them as can be led like cattle by thinly-disguised insurance lobbyists into a pasture to low about Hitler death panels to celebrate one of their own.
Listen, there are retards, but when snowgrifter has to write “tax cuts” on her fucking hand as a cheatsheet because she wont remember it, well you just might be too retarded for even the republican party.
JMP: Sarah’s response: Ha ha, you said “cudgel.” And “misogyny.”
JMP: Here’s how its gonna go down.
It will be Santorectum/Retard 2012. They’re going to say a bunch of crazy and stupid shit and get all of the attention. Then later Mitt will come into the primaries, and he will be the voice of reason. Republicans, conservative and teabaggers will be relieved and then every one of them will vote for Mittmo. And of course, the MSM will revel in it and spend most of the time airing the the republican retardation.
The viewers will forget about Obama and will be confused again. Democrats and liberals will stay at home playing with themselves, their broken iPads, and watching TV shows about vampires and the new American Idol (the cumback kid!!!). Then in January, America will wake up from a wonderful slumber and find themselves staring at inauguration with some animatronic mormon being sworn in. America will spit its own coffee and OJ out and say in unison “WHAT THE FUCK??!!.” Then CNN will have a four part new series called ,”What Happened to the Democrats and Why did the Cultist Win?”
bend: Here’s one:
http://comicbooth.com/images/palin_ants.gif
How’s that hopey-changey stuff working out for ya?” Actually great, you dumb-ass, my brother-in-law got to keep his car-salesman job because of cash-for-clunkers, I paid less taxes, and I’m not embarassed to be an American anymore.
Hey, Sarah, Ronaldus Maximus can’t hear you. His ears are too flooded with the blood of Central America. Dicks also too.
Sarah Palin is unqualified to — *looks down at palm*–lead this Country!
bhosp: Oh, c’mon holmes. If you’re gonna break it in 3, go the full haiku on it.
It bears repeating
Though crass it may be to say:
Motherfucking cunt.
I was delighted to relaize that ‘motherfucking cunt’ is 5 syllables. This could revolutionize John McCain’s marriage, also.
queeraselvis v 2.0: “One of the best Governors in America”
So good she totally fixed Alaska in just two and a half years.
Okay, so when we call Sarah a retarded cunt, we know we’re just being satirical, okay?
Gopherit: Perry is quite the pistol, or so they say.
Her ignorance is not frustrating - lots of people are ignorant, and they are not frustrating by mere virtue of their existence. What is frustrating about her is that her revelry in that ignorance - not so cleverly disguised as down-to-earth folksiness - makes her a hero to the very people who are a) capable of giving her the support that allows her to achieve more than she ever should, and b) being taken by her along the way for everything she can get them to pony up.
I do give her credit, though, for dropping Alaska’s governorship - knowing that she could get around all those tricksy ethics issues by just giving up the onerous part of the job (i.e. the job itself) is in fact a pretty dang smart play. Mock her all you like, but she will be dipping Trig’s pork rinds in caviar for a long time to come thanks to her winning the American Celebrity Lottery.
V572625694: Satire means not saying fucking
Dean Booth: Geezus, it’s too early in the morning for shit like that.
Minnie Mean: Good points. When it was reported that the scumbum who murdered the two in Brentwood and drew a Celebrity Black pass had sold 5,000 of his alibi tapes, that was leavened with the sales figure for a special how-to CD on the chisel: 15,000.
My introduction to Major News Events was the time the protestors in our town were sitting down on the steps of the County Building, placards laying by. Then the hatchback with the letters of the regional teevee station inscribed pulled up, and they all hopped up and filled his very small video lens with their narcissism for a few seconds. And in the evening it ran like Woodstock.
EdFlinstone: You’re right. This is a perfect joke. I’ve thought about doing a photoshop of her hand with something funnier written on it, but I simply can’t.
Speaking of energy…Palin’s retardation is pure energy. Forget nucular, oil, and gas, we can tap into Palin’s powerful mental retardation and light up the eastern seaboard. Those folks can get tax cuts for using that alternative energy.
Gopherit: This is the (wet) dream GOP ticket: Bumpit/GayHair 2012!
gurukalehuru: True: the word “fucking” does not appear in Gulliver’s Travels or Animal Farm. Therefore Sarah was applying a lit-crit standard to Rahm’s statement. Who knew she was such a scholar?
JMP: Santorum running is one of the biggest laughs. That bonehead couldn’t even get 40% of the people in Pensylvania to vote for him. And it will afford us another opportunity to view sad/creepy/hysterical pictures of his family when he ultimately drops out of the race.
Woodwards Friend: Are you an Ebonics major or just a blog troll?
Also too, I wonder how the PUMA turned Palin lovers are coping, knowing their vajayjay hero is supporting Gov. Goodhair and not KayBay down in Texas. The degree of difficulty involved in that intellectual hypocrisy is off the charts.
The difference between a hockey mom and a pitbull is a pitbull never quits.
FlownOver: my co workers are laughing at your remark. Your 100k check is in the mail.
Cape Clod: I think the only presidential candidate to ever win after losing their last major election was Nixon. And both he and the frothy mix of lube and fecal matter are/were nasty assholes, Dick was an intelligent nasty asshole, unlike the special little angel Santorum.
Flanders: Pistol grip dildo, also too.
Bowdoin: Anytime I feel good about humanity, I’ll look at how popular both the snowbilly and Family Guy and its spinoffs are, get reminded what morans most people really are, and need a drink.
I had notes written on the palm of my hand as I watched:
–9
–8
–6
–4
Bowdoin: Do those insurance lobbyists have red laser eyes?
EdFlinstone: Didn’t she say there was a special place in hell for women who didn’t vote for other women? At least she’ll be toasty warm down there. Such as.
Lets not forget this gem from the speech–”around the world, people who are seeking freedom from oppressive regimes wonder if Alaska is still that beacon of hope for their causes.” Yes Sarah, you and your teabaggers make those huddled masses from foreign lands feel so welcome. When are we moving the statue of liberty to Anchorage and changing the inscription to ‘dont fee them”?
EdFlinstone: feed you retard
queeraselvis v 2.0: Also, they’d make beautiful retards together.
Atum: Atum:
Funny you should say something about people being trolls….Seriously, dude, up your game, if you want us to hate you.
EdFlinstone: I wonder if it’s Palin giving this overblown importance to Alaska (here’s a hint: your state is an interesting curio that the rest of us pretty much just forget about most of the time) or if that’s common among residents of that weird, big and empty state.
By the way, has Sara followed in the footsteps of Sarah-with-an-h and up an quit on us? It’s been TWO AND A HALF HOURS with no posts at all.
You have to know that all her male fans just want to teabag her!
Tlmsd: I plan to donate it to The Cause. Thanks a lot, also too.
OMG, she actually used the phrase “homicide bomber”! I thought even Fox had stopped saying that when they realised how utterly, utterly stupid it was.
She is so determinedly dumb that if she runs for president she might win.
For my part - I don’t believe that Trig is missing a chromosone. I think he got absolutely everything he could from his parents. Poor tyke.
Woodwards Friend: the most eloquent and succinct posting i have ever seen along the i-way.
Don’t be hatin’, the girl can’t help it…
Hello Sunshine: They use that phrase to differentiate them from the “non-homicide” bombers.
You people be nice. They have a 600-person majority in this country so we better do what they say.
She is just evil. I don’t mind the occastional laugh at her greedy, ignorant, self-obsessed antics about town, but never, ever give her a platform to speak from, because she just sows evil with her words. Be afraid of La Palin, really.
I blame Michael Steele. He was tasked with the assignment of teaching her the vernacular trope “Talk to the Hand.”
The GOP Created this little Monster and set it loose on the world. Now as we all know, the Horror/Sci-Fi Genre is always 100% correct.
It’s a fact that when an evil Doctor (GOP) creates a Monster, (Palin) everything works out ok for a little while. Then slowly the Monster (Palin) starts going haywire and ends up turning on the evil Doctor (GOP) that created it.
I fully support Palin’s efforts to burn the castle down to the ground.
Atum: Congratulations on having survived the trip through the birth canal. Every snowflake is precious, even those whose brains formed outside their skulls.
Sarah Palin … tea-baggin’ it to the top.
Glenn Greenwald at Salon has a comment on the fact, not undergoing snark here, that Palin was wearing an Israeli glag pin. Which he says ‘is almost certainly grounded in her creepy desire to mold America’s foreign policy to fit her evangelical belief that God demands that “Israeli land” be unified under Israeli control in order for Jesus to return and sweep all the good Christians up to heaven in Rapture (while banishing everyone else — including the Jews she loves so much — straight to hell forever).” Please note: Giving the keys to the U.S. nuclear arsenal to someone who wants to bring about the end of the world might not be a really good idea.
I have a pants load that I would like to donate to the cause.
WTF??? SHE EVEN QUIT QUITTING???? WHAT A QUITTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
She is the queen of the mass base for fascism–the American version of Hitler or Mussolini, with lipstick and tits. Of course, Hitler and Mussolini could give a gripping speech. But whoever is pushing this chick knows that the American right doesn’t want someone who can give a gripping speech. They want someone they can feel comfortable with, someone who is like them…a RE-tard.
Ducksworthy: Glenn Greenwald - always on the money. Although, it should be said, the ‘forever’ there is redundant - Hell is by definition eternal (sorry, I was an altar boy, back in the day).
Snarkalicious:
Snowbilly Grifter
has a retarded baby
with a stupid name
Caribou Barbie
doesn’t like the word retard
it is offensive
Hey, Sarah Palin
you can just suck my dick
if you’re offended
Hey, Sarah Palin
did you or didn’t you use
a teleprompter?
Caribou Barbie
Even Putin’s ugly head
is no match for Trig’s
I apologize
for the previous Haiku
That’s not very nice
Snowbilly Grifter
Arctic turkey slaughterer
magazine reader
She was the mayor
of methopolis, AK
and sucked at that, too
Bible Spice loves
guns, freedom and jesus
but hates Obama
She flew from Texas
after water had broken
vagina of steel
Something like that?
Ducksworthy: But that’s why she
masturbates toloves Ronnie Raygun so damn much, yo.I forgot where I found this, but read it and weep.
“The former Alaska governor and one-time Republican vice presidential candidate also warned that President Barack Obama would not be reelected short of radically changing his policies, even perhaps by declaring war on Iran.”
Jesus wept.
Veteran political correspondent Mike Lupica has great take on Princess Snowbilly’s weekend.
http://www.nydailynews.com/news/politics/2010/02/08/2010-02-08_sarah_believe_me_you_have_delusions_of_grandeur.html
Aurelio: Mmmmmmm… Mussolini with tits…
Hand job.
That is all.
comicbookguy: Quite. Plus it’s important to distinguish them from regicide bombers, fraticide bombers and, in the case of Pat Tillman, amicicide bombers.
A Republican has to write “tax cuts” on her palm to remember it?
That’s like a liberal writing “weed” on their palm so they can remember why they left the house…
JMP: LEAVE SARAH/SARA ALONE!!!!!!
Sarah Palin–The Teabag Hand Job
Shorter Palin: “Fewer nigger cockbomber sympathizing perfessers, more Jebus-fearin carpet-bombing commanders-in-chief.”
Aurelio: I would refer you to Glenn Greenwald, also regarding “whoever is behind” the snowbilly grifter. We know. Bloody Billy Kristol selected her and she has the backing of the same lunatic cabal that brought us the Iraq war. The question is” Why do they hate America?
Gopherit: Right. Limbaugh=political satirist. Letterman=perv/satyrist?
gurukalehuru: WIN
Ducksworthy: Kristol and his neocon buddies keep pushing ideas like they’re going to get a winner based solely on probability. In that sense they’re like al-Qaida — they only have to succeed once, whereas the forces of sanity have to succeed over and over again. Fortunately for the forces of sanity, the neocons usually think they’ve already won.
JMP: TWO AND A HALF HOURS, SARA! (and no, a Wonkabout post on snow in D.C. don’t cut it. It’s February. Snow is not exactly a novelty.)
“And then, I think, kinda tougher to, kinda tougher to put our arms around, but, allowing America’s spirit to rise again by not being afraid [applause] not being afraid to kinda go back to some of our roots as a God-fearing nation [applause] where we’re not afraid to say, especially in times of potential trouble in the future here, we’re not afraid to say, “You know, we don’t have all the answers as fallible men and women so it would be wise of us to start seeking some divine intervention again in this country,” so that we can be safe and secure and prosperous again.”
What does that include exactly? The sun standing still? Rains of frogs? Water into wine? (Actually I’m all for that last one there.) I’m just asking -
And what’s the ‘again’ part, in “divine intervention again in this country”? Which of these events does she consider to have been an act of God;
- Washington crossing the Deleware
- Jack Benny and Richard Nixon playing the Missouri Waltz together
- the Army distributing blankets infested with Typhoid fever to plains Indians
- the Smoot-Hawley Tariff Act
- invention of the snowmobile
- etc. etc.
Because honestly in my high school social studies classes, the whole divine intervention thing was really kind of glossed over.
snideinplainsight: Maybe she considers George W. becoming president despite Gore getting the most votes an example of divine intervention. However, that would require a malevolent and cruel deity; but then the one described in the Bible she follows certainly qualifies.
Ducksworthy: Bloody Billy Kristol selected her…. Right. Now I remember the Weekly Standard boys vetted her on their cruise to Alaska. She is exactly Bill Kristol’s type, isn’t she? A corn-fed brainless midwestern shiksa “hottie.” But then Billy boy himself is just a tool of some other very rich and powerful people with fascist leanings and a need for a mass base.
Escape Goat Nation: Something about being careful when you attempt to stare at the abyss and are surprised to find, etc., etc.
The problem is that the GOP really has no concept of the sublime.
Escape Goat Nation: Complete with obligatory mob wielding pitchforks and torches, but this time the mob is on the side of the monster???
JMP:
However, that would require a malevolent and cruel deity; but then the one described in the Bible she follows certainly qualifies. Yeppers. That’s exactly the kind of cosmic prick that would create a world with Sarah in it.
snideinplainsight: Because honestly in my high school social studies classes, the whole divine intervention thing was really kind of glossed over.
Thats coz u wuz edumacated by LIEberul sozshalists!
But can she play armpit music?
Back at Wasilla High, a young Sarah Palin was suspended for writing “math” on her hand before an Algebra exam
rocktonsammy: Hey, Danica won a race in IndyCar in Japan a year ago, and has never quit just for the hell of it.
I think Maria Sharapova’s a much better fit.
S.Luggo: Haven’t you listened to her speeches?
Jim89048: in the spirit of promoting political satire and still using the word retard, henceforth, I will refer to Palin as Retard Factory.
Dean Booth: Hello Dali
Diana Davies: I’m SO getting that on a t-shirt.
Roll Fish: WIN.
Berkeley Bear: Sharapova actually won some tournaments, too. You’re probably thinking of Anna Kournikova, who really didn’t ever win anything but got a lot of mileage from looking good in a tennis skirt.
wait. We can’t call her a retard because she has one? Can we call her a cunt? Oh wait… How about a dick? Yeah, I’ll call her a dick. How’s she gonna tell me I can’t?
Stupid, half-term, tax-dodging, lying, ignoramus, hand-jive talkin’, fucking dick. There! I feel better now.
Potater: She vastly improved performance of the Governors office.
queeraselvis v 2.0: Yeah. You know who else the libruls thought was a brain damaged retard? And how’d that turn out for ya?
All I know about Sarah Palin I learned from Andrew Sullivan.
But, I am confused.
Is she just a money-grubbing grifter?
OR Is she motivated primarily by her creepy religious beliefs?
OR is she a foxxy little Stepford Wife controlled by ultra-conservative Tod?
OR is she a vindictive bitch controlled by the Cheney-ites?
My head is spinning.
desertwind: All of the above, and none of the above.
You had me at telepalmer.