AMERICA TO BECOME SUPER RICH AGAIN WITH THIS THING: Today we are all Caulkers: “The president also recommended that Congress enact a new ‘cash for caulkers’ program, which would offer financial incentives for homeowners to weatherize their homes. Senior administration officials said the program, based on the successful ‘cash for clunkers’ automobile rebate program, would leverage hiring in construction and manufacturing — sectors especially hard hit by the recession — while promoting energy efficiency, resulting in long-term savings for homeowners.” Leverage! Long-term savings! Incentivizing! Welcome to the 21st century, America, where “home insulation” is Product A. [Washington Post]
Previous post: Idiot Ben Nelson Introduces War Bonds Act, Because He Is Responsible
Next post: Nobody’s Getting Anything Good For Xmas
{ 37 comments }
Caulk is Dead they say ..
Long Live Caulk!!
Long Live Caulk!!
MY CAULK CANNOT HANDLE ALL THAT WEATHERIZING.
Congress will, as usually, gladly take free caulk.
Good idea, bad nomenclature. Just b/c it fits on a bumper sticker, don’t mean it’s the right way to sell it. Plus, anything that sounds that much like ‘cock’ doesn’t belong in public policy, especially when there is cash being offered for it. Too much like a male escort service.
Wake me up when they pass Dollars for Drunkards.
So did they think up the “catchy” title, and then go back and imagine legislation that would somehow relate to it? Because it makes no fucking sense. How will caulking my windows shut — as recommended by DHS Secretary Ridge some years back — help the construction industry? And isn’t the problem now that there are too many houses anyway, because that’s why the prices are going down and coyotes are wandering the ruins of Riverside County?
Questions to ask your contractor:
- Do you like the taste of caulk?
- Is your caulk hot?
- How big is your caulk?
[re=474205]Sussemilch[/re]: Hell, I’d settle for Pennies for Potheads.
The caulksuckers in the Republican cualkus are gonna caulk blaulk all this “Cash for Caulkers” taulk.
ok, I’m going to recaulk my shower stall- how much do I get?
[re=474210]Come here a minute[/re]: – Can you complete the job by next Caulktober?
Who is going to squeeze all those caulk guns until the cracks are filled?
Cash for “Caulk” is that what the Republicans are calling it these days? Someone pass the word at all the popular cruising locations.
Yeah, whenever I play Monopoly, I always choose the Caulk Gun token. Because Scottie Dog takes it up the a**.
Spackle me, Obama, spackle me!! Oh, YES!!!!
WTF??
This is going to end badly. Very badly.
Wouldn’t it make more sense to just be forthright and call it “Money for Gay Sex”?
[re=474224]bureaucrap[/re]: That’s the formal title.
Don’t they already have this, in the form of a tax credit for installing insulation? Maybe they could combine this program with health care reform and get Insulin for Insulators.
The inevitable Republican counter-proposal (to remove all insulation from homes and businesses, because of freedom) will be called Caulk Blocker.
I would totally take a subsidized half-bath and kitchen island.
I don’t know about y’all, but I just bought a 90 year old house that could use some insulation. It’s warmer in the attic than it is in the house right now.
I hear Tiger Woods was a big fan of getting his caulk worked on.
(PS- I actually think it’s a good and somewhat clever idea. Which means it’ll never happen as DC most people in DC doesn’t do clever)
“Handouts for Handjobs.” In the end, we have to get this back to the basics. We don’t make anything in the US anymore, the economy is based on writing POS accounting and inventory management software for fast food shops and mowing each other’s lawns. We are simply gonna have to stimulate the economy with some sin industry programs, we need to jumpstart the economy from the waist up, then everyone can take their whore-ing money and buy Kentucky Fried Chicken, con-agra will sell some more frying oil, Someone can program the POS system, and tghen everyone goes out and buys a handjob and its starts all over again.
The “multiplier effect” is amazing, you just get 100 people in a huge circle, and everyone jerk off the person to their right, for $10; by the time everyone comes, thats a $1,000 contribution to the GNP, just from the same $10 going around and around that circle.
The Circle Jerk economy, really, its basically all we got.
Makes sense, terrible name. Kind of like Fareed Zakaria.
The wine industry, like construction, is in a terrible slump. Years of bumper crops have led to an oversupply of product, directly coinciding with a drastic decline in European drinking habits (the kids are favoring beer and spirits these days). Plus, the wine industry’s own marketing efforts promoting wine as an “upscale” way to tipple have worked against them, as now its seen as almost more chic to economize.
All this has led to fire-sale prices on even really good wines and the lower prices go, the lower consumers expect the prices to go and consequently wineries are laying off their employees at an alarming rate.
I think the government could use it’s leverage, incentivizing those wineries to keep their staffs intact by paying some or all their labor costs.
“Cash for Corkers,” as it were.
Leverage! Long-term savings! Incentivizing! Welcome to the
21st century1980s, AmericaCorrected.
[re=474285]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: It would be better if the government had a Cash for Drinkers program. Incentivizing Americans to keep drinking in order to anaesthetize ourselves from the pain of a bad economy.
What could go wrong??
actually, we should all be building houses out of straw bales. no caulk involved
Meh. Still gunning for “Cash for Sharkeys.”
Cash for putting caulk in a crack? A stimulating stimulus package to get America back to work on the Hershey Highway.
[re=474253]Prommie[/re]: WIN!!!!!!1!!
Son: Are they really this oblivious, daddy?
Dad: Yes, Jimmy. But, where in the hell did you learn the word “oblivious”? From your damned socialist public school system? No more book-learnin’ for you; you’re going to be home schooled.
[re=474253]Prommie[/re]: You want to see the ultimate fate of the Circle Jerk Economy, Prommie. One word: Michigan. Yep, my homestate played the circle jerk for decades, and even as it came crashing down we continued to play it. Everyone played it for the ultimate benefit of the auto industry, and look what happened.
You’ve been warned, America. Repent, bitches! Repent!
[re=474271]stolichnayaaa[/re]: “…terrible name. Kind of like Fareed Zakaria.”
And Debbie Wasserman Schultz.
[re=474235]Accordion-o-rama[/re]:
Win!
Comments on this entry are closed.