Unwanted orange-headed puff-dildo.OH FUCK OFF & DROP DEAD: “Former CNN anchor Lou Dobbs, pondering a future in politics, is trying to wipe away his image as an enemy of Latino immigrants by positioning himself as a champion of that fast-growing ethnic bloc.” [WSJ]

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  1. Some might worry that such a shift would appear to be an act of crass political hypocrisy reaching Liebermanesque levels. Dobbs, however, calmed his advisors fears by explaining to them that Latinos are too lazy, dumb and busy taking our jobs to notice.

  2. What do you expect? He’s an ‘entertainer’ like Glen & Bill etc. He’d fuck a bald eagle on the steps of the capitol if he thought it would get him what he wants.

  3. [re=466220]bonghitsforjesus[/re]: He will have to do an Emily Litella of epic proportions, convincing us that he’s actually been concerned all this time about bird flu and the migratory patterns of contagious Accipitridae:

    “What’s all this I hear about ill eagle immigrants?”

    (If you’re a young whippersnapper, you’ll have to google “Emily Litella”… and then, get off my lawn!)

  4. Dobbs/Palin ’12, POPPY! Let’s dump this uppity “cottonpicking” muslin and get a crazy old white racist asshole in the White House for once!!!!!!!111

  5. So, he’ll alienate the crazies who actually still like him, *and* immigrants will remember all the awful shit he’s said about them and still hate his guts. Lou is truly a brilliant strategist.

  6. I’ve got the title for his pre-presidential book

    “Lou Dobbs: A Lifetime of FAIL, CNNFN, Birtherism, and How I Plan to Re-Elect Barack Obama “

  7. haven’t read the wsj article, but i’m sure they unblinkingly lapped up whatever was drooling out of lou’s right-wing pie hole.

    this is why i’m giving a rat’s ass if news corp takes it’s ahem valuable content out of google.

  8. Every word out of my mouth at CNN was placed there by liberal propagandists. Those bastardos! You should all know that my hispanic wife, goes by the ‘nombre’ Maria, would beat me nightly for those words. Isn’t that punishment enough, amigos?

  9. Lou, Lou, Lou. Do you think the Hispanic folks are stupid? That they’ll all be collectively struck with amnesia and forget what you’ve said?

    Dude, you are just plain delusional.

  10. When the 2012 Presidential election comes, The Bitters are going to run Sarah Palin and Ted Nugent.
    The People who read People are going to run Oprah.
    The Democrats will only have this tired, worn out black man.
    Lou Dobbs will be set to pick up votes from people who scream at kids who touch their lawns.

  11. People most screwed by newly arrived illegal immigrants, Oldly arrived illegal immigrants. Actually blacks too. And low born whites that have little choice but to fight for the (black) man in AfPakistan. Joe soy Lou Dobbs candy dato for Senate. I luv it to pieces.

  12. [re=466222]memzilla[/re]: What’s all this talk I keep hearing about Presidential erections? …. what? oh, that’s very different! Never mind!

  13. Yeah, good luck with that Dobbs. And we mescans were hoping you’d run for POTUS so we can take you down like a piñata (filled with poo poo).

    Dobbs is a Racist, Never Forget!

  14. So because he has an AFTRA card and a big mouth, he’s qualified to hold office? And because the AFTRA card enabled him to be on the teevee — whee! — star-struck wingnuts will vote for him? Next thing you know, he’ll be calling ketchup a vegetable.

  15. In other news, Colonel Saunders is positioning himself as a champion of chickens. He’s still going to chop them up and eat them, but he won’t appear to be as happy about it.

    That is all.

  16. The WSJ article ponders whether Dobbs could play a Perot-esque third-party “spoiler” in the 2012 Prez el(r)ections. Oh please god yes, nothing would make me happier than the Teabaggers formally burning the Republican ‘cards’ they used to carry all the time, and rally around this maniac loser. Splitting Romney’s (honestly, who else is it gonna be?) base in half in the process, also.

  17. HA HA HA HA it’s like he thinks people won’t remember what he did before he changed his mind. This is like Gov. Wallace almost, but I can’t see how Dobbsy is really going to convince people of that.

  18. In related news, Romney wants folks to know he really supports gay rights and is pro-choice, but only when he’s running in blue states. In red states he’s against those things and wants to quadruple the size of Gitmo for throwing in gays, gypsies and all other undesirables.

    Palin has now announced (to those who read Mother Jones) that she’s swearing off meat forever and enrolling in a PhD program in the humanities and political philosophy at the Sorbonne. Except when in the South – there she’ll continue to be the official spokesgal for home schooling, Wal-Martians and possum pot pie.

  19. America, let’s help Lou celebrate his current mid-life crisis. (Why is this jagoff even in our stream of consciousness? He reads a teleprompter and hates stuff. I can do that.)

  20. Ken, why are you guys linking to Onion articles? You’re supposed to find fappery and stupidity in the MSM news outlets, aren’t you? Not intentionally funny parody news. Now you’re not even trying; is it because of the upcoming holiday?

  21. You know the old Vulcan proverb — Only Nixon could go to China. Maybe this is a case of “Only Lou can solve the illegal immigrant issue.”

    And if you believe Lou is being Nixonian, I’ve got a bridge in Brooklyn I’d like to sell you.

  22. [re=466309]Come here a minute[/re]: And Rush can’t be racist, his production manager is black! That’s my wingnut dad says all the time when he’s constantly defending Rush’s racism and racial parodies.

  23. Ken, I sincerely hope that you’re in Hawai’i or Tahiti or something, because 3:27 a.m. is absolutely no time to be thinking and posting about Lou Dobbs, dead or otherwise.

    If you’re having trouble sleeping, try doing something less harmful, like smoking, drinking, or cruising for Mexican tranny hookers in unlit interstate rest stop bathrooms, or something.

  24. Looks like someone has been drinking the tamarindo-flavored Kool-Aid. Don’t let them messicans lie to you, Dobbs! They really DO want to shoot up your house and mow your lawn and stuff.

  25. This is the most cunning of political plans since Hitler decided to show that he was a friend to the Jews by getting them all to take a shower.

  26. This announcement is just plain repugnant and offensive, as if he’s literally shouting “fuck you” into the air at all of the Mexicans he’s disparaged over his entire life.

    Needless to say, I’m waiting to hear him utter “but I have a Mexican wife.” You know it’s coming.

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