Wonkette
- Hamid Karzai’s brother, a prominent opium dealer (!), has been receiving CIA paychecks for eight years. He will now be fired and replaced by a teenager and an iPhone app. Recession! [New York Times]
- A car bomb killed 86 people in Peshawar a couple hours after Hillary Clinton left Peshawar. [AP]
- At least six UN-related people died in a bombing in Kabul. Predictably, the Taliban has claimed responsibility, for such is their schtick. [Washington Post]
- Those pilots who appeared to have totally forgotten to land the plane for an entire hour after they were supposed to have done so have lost their licenses. [CNN]
- “Consumer confidence”—evidently an actual metric and not something people just say—is up for the first time since 2007. [Reuters]
- It’s looking like Iran might outsource its uranium enrichment needs, which is exactly what Obama wanted. [Reuters]
Have you ever flown to or from Minneapolis airport? Staying in the air is a better option. (And Larry Craig would have preferred it.)
I was hoping for Iran to keep its uranium enrichment program, so as to score another loss for n00Bama.
Did I get my explanation from anyone about how the Nobel Peace Prize is a bribe to influence Hopey? I do not understand that idea but I gather it is out there. Influence him to do what? Make peace- because that is a bad thing?
My lovely bride works at the FAA, so I suggested she write a rule requiring commerical pilots to push a “monkey button” every 10 minutes to prove they are awake or an alarm would go off. Believing pilots would regard “monkey button” as offensive, she decided to call it a PAT button (Pilot Awareness Test) after rejecting calling it a FART button (Flight Alertness Reaction Test). Expect 10 years of delay before PAT comes to a cockpit near you.
First, that loser Ahmed Chalabbi whose intel on Iraq was worse that what was coming from Dick Cheney and the rest of the neoboobs, Curveball (the demented Iraqi defector that lied about Maddas’ WMD capabilities post 91) now Brother Karzai the opium dealer. The CIA really knows how to pick’em in the Middle East/Central Asia.
Who, exactly, are these consumers with this so-called confidence? Confidence in what? Not going insolvent this quarter but maybe next? Let’s see, if we skip all the utlilty bills, let the Saturn get repo’d, sell the wedding rings, and take in seven foster kids for the per deim, well just be able to pay last month’s mortgage payment. Yep, I’m confident.
Now Iran is going to have to contact a call center in Iowa for all its uranium support issues. The Iowans will all take on names like “Ahmad” and affect Farsi accents: “Hello, this would be Mahmoud. How may I be providing you with excellent service today?”
Mahousu: Brilliant.
Last week I ate in a restaurant owned by Hamid Karzai’s sister. It’s called Helmand, and is located on the east side of Cambridge, Massachusetts. The food is good and the service is good. My only complaint is how aggressively they’re pushing the opium kaddo. Otherwise, the place is perfect.
Fucking CIA and Tricky Dicky, screwing up Afghani-land one opium dealer at a time. Get the troops the fuck out of that pile of rubble.
“Consumer confidence” … is up
The federal Viagra is finally starting to work?
I love the idea of an iphone app that can replace CIA operatives. Sort of like “Grinder”, it can tell you whether there is a bribable official or opium supplier anywhere nearby. Brilliant, Juli!!!
McDuff: Nice, and a shame that your lovely bride rejected the FART button. Might I suggest an entire computer program that monitors the pilots throughout the flight, namely the Flight Awareness Program (FAP). The fact that it would have to be engaged repeatedly makes the FAP even more useful (e.g., FAP FAP FAP), also.
Why is Obama dithering on support for the opium trade? Where are our European allies supposed to get their heroin if not from Afghanistan?
Opium is so elitist. Real America uses booze and meth.
It’s a win-win. The Iranian glow rods are being sent to North Korea under the label “herbal supplements”.
“They each had had a 19-hour layover in San Diego; neither said he had slept or argued during the flight, but both said “there was a distraction” in the cockpit, according to the report.”
e-pr0n leading to manlove. Just like the seafarers of old (”Men men men men…”).
queeraselvis v 2.0: Pilot: Please land the plane, FAP.
FAP: I’m sorry Dave, I can’t do that.
Pilot: Land the plane, FAP!
FAP: I’m sorry Dave, but this conversation no longer serves a useful purpose. Goodbye.
CaiteeCruelle: yeah I was thinking the same thing. well at least the pr0n thing. I mean, who accidentally works an extra hour? No one, that’s who.
Brother Karzai is letting the side down. Back when I was on the smack it was all shitty south-of-the-border tar, not the fine Asian powder. Fire his ass if he can’t achieve better market penetration.
So a pilot screws up in a non fatal minor way and loses his job. I wonder if they worked for the government what would have happened.
ManchuCandidate: Sometimes, you have to go to war with the heroin dealing informants you have instead of the the ones you want, that’s a known known.
There are a bewildering number of dead enders involved with any Republican administration, how much authority the dead enders possess at any given time is an known unknown.
The co-efficient of substandard heroin dealing informants when indexed against the percentage of Republican dead enders in any given administration produces an unknown unknown. In that regard, Republicans are much like flatulence. They may seem relatively benign, perhaps even a pleasant release of pent up internal political pressure until loosed upon the world at which point your national taint begins to burn, your eyes begin to bleed and the neighboring countries are reduced to retching and gagging.
Paul Tardy: Well, if an Amtrak pilot/driver accidentally sailed through an hour’s worth of stops before reclaiming control of the train, I’m guessing they’d be fired, too.
Someone on Shouty Keith’s show said pilots fall asleep more often than we know. I am left to wonder why we aren’t told. I would want to choke a bitch who couldn’t stay awake in the cockpit of a goddamn fucking extra big ass airplane.
Naked Bunny with a Whip: Andre Agassi? Is that you?
Please No One Do A ‘Hilarious Topical Political Costume’ And Dress Up As Hamid Karzai’s CIA-Informant Brother
Crap.
**Trudges back to “Abdullah’s Fez & Fake Mustache Bazaar” wishing he’d checked the returns policy**
Was . . . was . . . :::sob!::: Benazir Bhutto killed in that Peshawar bombing?
And it shows good judgment that they waited until after Hillary had flown out before setting the thing off. Good plastic explosive is not cheap.
No point in wasting valuable ordinance on someone so completely irrelevant as the current “Secretary of State.”
dijetlo:
Is that you, Rummy?
ManchuCandidate: I was just trying to reduce it to a format even Republicans could understand, no need to get insulting…
dijetlo:
Heh.
The CIA has the best secret stash evah.
ManchuCandidate: It is rumored the Agency is planning to admit to the Kennedy Conspiracy. It will mark their first, and, thus far, only successful enterprise.
“There are fifty thousand guys over at Langley reading newspapers.” - Nixon’s assessment of the CIA, caught on his stealth tapes.
Neilist: God, can he be banned, already? Fucking joking about assassinations every other post this goon is.