Wonkette
Those two South Carolina county GOP chairs who got BUSTED yesterday for calling Sen. Jim DeMint a cheap Jew — as a compliment however! — have now apologized to the Internet. James Ulmer and Edwin Merwin, who wrote in response to an editorial attacking Jim DeMint for his weak procurement of federal dollars that, “There is a saying that the Jews who are wealthy got that way not by watching dollars, but instead by taking care of the pennies and the dollars taking care of themselves,” now say that they did not mean any offense by using this line of logic that Adolf Hitler once heard and went insane over.
Merwin’s letter is much more direct of an apology, but Ulmer’s takes a more of a, “Well well well…” tone:
Last week I co-authored a letter to the editor which focused on the vital importance of reining in the unsustainable and excessive federal government spending which is going on currently in Washington, D.C. In one of the paragraphs which I wrote, I quoted a statement which I have heard many times in my life, truly in admiration for a method of bettering one’s lot in life.
I admit that perception is indeed reality to many and that I could have certainly worded that sentence much better. I sincerely apologize for this great error. If I had quoted that great man from Pennsylvania, Ben Franklin, using his, “A penny saved is a penny earned,” I doubt I would be writing this note.
I meant absolutely nothing derogatory by the reference to a great and honorable people. I hope that anyone and all who were offended by my comment will accept my humble apology.
But why can’t we just replace Jim DeMint with a Jew if they’re so good at shit?
S.C. Republicans apologize for using Jewish stereotype [Salon/War Room]
What a gyp.
Oy vey.
As a non-jew who isn’t good with money, I accept his apology.
Yes, he could’ve worded his letter better, by saying, “As any goddamn Kike in Jew York City knows, if you watch the pennies the shekels will roll in, $3 billion per year in foreign military sales credits, now where are my goddamn bunker-buster bombs?”
Ben Franklin was Jewish? So that’s why people keep calling me kite?
I thought the maxim was: Penny wise, pound foolish. No, sorry, that’s the RNC’s fiscal policy plank.
Just watch that you don’t accidentally lead a town hall congregation in singing “Oy ir nairischen tzienistn.”
Schmucks.
“I love the Jews, I swear! I’d love’em even more if they all moved back to Israel and it got blowed up real gud so the End of Days/Rapture can begin and the REAL chosen people of virtuous fat and stupid US Americcuns get sent to heavens.”
That was cheap.
facehead: The correct term for a “non-Jew” is “a real American.”
Ulmer is clearly an Indian-giver.
There’s at least as much blame for the newspaper’s editor. Who could read that sentence twice and not know there was a nigger in the woodpile?
What he meant was, just put a change jar in every federal office in the land, the people who work there can drop in their loose change they have left over from buying their morning latte, and *boom* Federal deficit spending is solved.
That’s what those clever Jews would do, anyway.
So his full reasoning is this:
Ben Franklin was a tightwad like the Jews, so what’s the problem, Libtards? Besides, my pappy and brother/cousin Cletus said that shit all the time.
Brilliant.
“I really like Jewish people. Just ask my pal: Kikey Kikeman.”
I think what Mr. Merwin was trying to say was that the last thing this country needs right now is more jews wandering around, screwing everything up and stealing all of our money.
It’s pretty difficult to disagree with that.
How did the saying go? A billion here, a billion there, and soon you’re talking real money.
Is he even aware that the difference between his original statement and Franklin’s aphorism is that one of them doesn’t rely on an ethnic stereotype? The way he phrases his apology, it seems like the whole thing is one big random, unknowable process to him. Sorta like the rule against fucking your sister.
Today’s lunch special at Café Ulmerwin:
A glass of whine, a pound of flesh, and a lightly tossed word salad, all for 30 shekels.
Meh, wake me up when the South Carolina GOP apologizes for electing Jim DeMint..
“I meant absolutely nothing derogatory by the reference to a great and honorable people. I hope this apology placates them and they don’t punish me by kidnapping my children for use in their rituals. I mean I hope they’ll rememember me in their prayers. They do pray, right? Oh, fuck, I need to re-do this last paragraph…”
ManchuCandidate: MLHencken: He has piles of Jew friends!
He even lets them use his shower when they come over to bar-b-que.
SayItWithWookies: In his mind this is his version of “Don’t call me a slut.”
“I admit that perception is indeed reality to many and that I could have certainly worded that sentence much better.”
Translation: I’m sorry that you perceived me as using a slur. My, but you are an emotional and prickly people!
“If I had quoted that great man from Pennsylvania, Ben Franklin, using his, “A penny saved is a penny earned,” I doubt I would be writing this note.”
But you didn’t, you racist asswipe!
Some of my best friends are Jewish!
I quoted a statement which I have heard many times in my life…
You see, Ulmer has history. He was anti-Semitic back when being anti-Semitic wasn’t cool. This is no Hymie-come-lately at that Jewish business.
I think I see the seeds of another fantastic Mel Brooks musical.
Good luck trying to find a doctor or lawyer the next time you need one, buddy boy.
Both of them rely on ’some people were offended’ phrasing, without even saying that it was Jewish folks who they slurred.
And hey, he didn’t realize it was derogatory because he’d heard it many times! Living in rural South Carolina, how could he imagine that frequent-used sayings about Jews could be anti-Semetic?
DEMINT IS A WUSSY RINO. EVERYBODY SEND HIM JEW SALT (NUTMEG? )TO HIS OFFICE.
I am sorry–truly sorry–that you Jews are so thin-skinned.
In his apology, that guy could’ve worded EVERY sentence much better!
“I apologize for inartfully wording my slur, I must confess that I nigger-rigged that sentence, and when I say “nigger-rig,” I am expressing my deep admiration and respect for the ingenious resourcefulness of the negro people. If only they weren’t so shiftless and would get to work like them chinamen and those wetbacks, but you know how they are, all childlike and irresponsible, and I say that not from hate, why hell, we love our negroes down here, the thing is, we understand them, unlike you naive liberals and you Jew Yorkers always looking down oin us. Its not racism, its the great chain of being. They were better off as slaves, you see, because they were cared for, they were in fact very valuable. Thank you.”
JMP: It’s cool. He’s [a href='http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x2DxyAGzGxM']taking it back[/a href].
El Pinche: A bag of kosher rock candy foreskins is already en route.
Extemporanus: This is what I DeMint to say, but I got hung up on the ‘DeMint has piles’ part. Ewww!
Aflac Shrugged: FMHTML.
>>”I hope that anyone and all who were offended by my comment”
Conditional apology = FAIL.
A whole bunch of googling came up with no decent source for the phrase “take care of the pence [or pennies] and the pounds [or dollars] will take care of themselves”. It did find an occurrence as far back as 1750, though. On the other hand, it did not find any association with Jews, except for the many pointing out the bigotry of these gentlemen.
I’m sure we’ll see a libtard editorial excoriating these good Americans in the Jew York Times.
I have a friend in South Carolina who is Jewish (as am I). He treated me recently to a nice dinner in Greenville when I visited on business.
BTW — Jews that got ahead despite rampant anti-Semitism did so on talent, effort, education and savvy, just like everyone else who did the same.
“What I meant to say is Sen. DeMint is really good at jewing down the price of govt services. It was meant as a compliment. I am in no way racist against yids.”
His apology was really only meant for the Jewish men who were offended. As for the Jewesses — hell, it was probably just that time of the month.
“I admit that perception is indeed reality to many ” whereas for most of us, our idea of reality is based on our imagination rather than those pesky perceptions.
Prommie: Heh. It’s not funny, ’cause it true.
You know who else apologized for calling the Jews penny-pinching misers?
Aflac Shrugged: Try sideways carets (Shift-comma & Shift-period) instead of brackets & your html will sing.
So Ulmer has now said he is sorry he is an anti-Semite?
I’m telling on him to the Elders. We’ll make matzah out of his grandkids. We could probably make a mint selling it on Ebay too.
Hmmm, let’s see, we’re putting together the outline for our latest Republican scandal. How about this time we include the following aspects:
1. South Carolina.
2. Republicans.
3. Anti-Semitic, anti-Jewish morons.
4. Stupid, anti-Semitic, anti-Jewish statements by anti-Semitic, anti-Jewish morons.
5. Stupid rednecks.
6. Rural, out-of-it county.
7. Religious idiots.
Theres! That should do it! Now–what? What’s that, you say? Orangeburg County, South Carolina? Some Republican Party Chairman said what? Really? Oh, okay.
Problem solved! Scandal completed!
Next!
Well, now I know what I’ll be wearing for Halloween. A Groucho glasses-with-nose-and-eyebrows set and carrying a bulging canvas bank deposit bag. I’m sure the kids will love it!
Come here a minute: You do know what ethnic segment runs the Googles, don’t you?
Nothing else has worked so far
So I’ll wish upon a star
Wonderous shining speck of light
I need a Jew
Lois makes me take the rap
Cause our checkbook looks like crap
Since I can’t give her a slap
I need a Jew
Where to find
A Baum or Steen or Stein
To teach me how to whine and do
my taaaaaxesss…
Though by many they’re abhored
Hebrew people I’ve adored
Even though they killed my Lord
I need a Jew
In an unrelated story, Stewart David Nozette tried to sell Jim Demint a bunch of government secrets …
The guy is obviously lying. You can’t quote Ben Franklin in the South because everyone there knows he was a nigger-lover.
Dangerous: Sounds like your friend is good with money.
ManchuCandidate: There’s someone advertising on Craigslist for a pet sitting service for when the Rapture comes. For a mere $50 (upfront) this person (atheist, of course)promises to go to your house and feed the cat, walk the dog, etc.
SayItWithWookies: Whoa whoa whoa, hold on a second…there’s a rule against fucking your sister?
Extemporanus: THEY MELT IN YER MOUTH BUT NOT IN YER HAND
Yeah and Curtis mayfield said, “Superfly, you’re gonna make your fortune bye and bye..” but you don’t here no ofays sayin that yo had some good advise.
I always thought Franklin looked a bit like he had those little Orthodox curls that hang down. It it wouldn’t be so hard for him to have hidden a yarmulke back there while posing for one famous portrait after another.
http://thetandd.com/articles/2009/10/18/opinion/doc4ad90f14cb86e810566587.txt
DeMint watches out for all of us
There is a saying that the Heebs who are wealthy got that way not by watching dollars, but instead by selling stolen Christian babies on the E-bay. The chubby blond ones go the fastest. (Picked up a cuplar cheap myself.) By not using earmarks to fund projects for South Carolina and instead using actual bills, Jim DeMint is doing the same thing.
Ed, don’t bother checking under the Hanukkah tree this year.
BTW, there’s a call for you from somebody named Moss Ahd. Ed?
I admit that perception is indeed reality to many
Good God. That’s about the stupidest damn thing I’ve ever read. But like PsycGirl says, it does explain the Republican mindset - they think those crazy-ass fantasies in their heads IS REAL LIFE.
freakishlystrong: You get the W.
President Nixon: All right. I want a look at any sensitive areas around where Jews are involved, Bob. See, the Jews are all through the government, and we have got to get in those areas. We’ve got to get a man in charge who is not Jewish to control the Jewish . . . do you understand?
Haldeman: I sure do.
President Nixon: The government is full of Jews.
Haldeman: I sure do.
President Nixon: Second, most Jews are disloyal. You know what I mean? You have a—you have a Garment and a Kissinger and, frankly, a Safire, and, by God, they’re exceptions. But, Bob, generally speaking, you can’t trust the bastards. They turn on you. Correct? Am I wrong or right?
Haldeman: Sure, and their whole orientation is against this administration anyway or against you.
President Nixon: They have this arrogant attitude, too.
Lionel Hutz Esq.:
Little known factoid. Actual name: Rabbi Ben Ezra Franklinmoyer.
Because of rampant prejudice against jew-priests, he anglicized his name in order to be allowed to play quoits at the Bucks County Country Club, early tee-time. Invented the Hebrew National all-beef hotdog. And Klezmer music. Early supporter of Judea. Most famous saying: buy low; is that such a crime? A pre-Reagan Reagan. Gotta love the guy, as non-Christians go.
— Edwin Merwin
OK, so now I want to know who are the NOT so “great and honorable people”.
What a classic and epic non-apology.
“I quoted a statement which I have heard many times in my life…”
The subtle self-justification here is since he heard it, like, so many times in his life, it means that the idiom had some kind of social currency somewhere, and thus he’s not eminently and solely horrible.
“I admit that perception is indeed reality to many and that I could have certainly worded that sentence much better.
The subtle self-justification here is that he’s disappointed/angry that perception is really is about as much reality as we can we ever care to go past, that he’s so damned secretly irked that some many couldn’t see how obviously and effusively he was praising those “money-grubbing Jews”, right?
Lastly, in that same sentence, he shows exactly why it’s not an apology. To him, the problem wasn’t with the ridicoulsy offensive and silly stereotype; the problem was really only the wording of the sentence. This is why the Republican Party will finish itself off. They simply don’t get it, now or ever.
How many racists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two, one to screw in the lightbulb, and the other to complain about how the white guy screws the lightbulb in so much better than those chinks, niggers, wetbacks, and hymies.
Can’t we let the Carolinas just secede? They tried once and we wouldn’t let them. Now we can’t get rid of them!
When I called him a darky, I was just complimenting him on his hard work ethic.