Wonkette
GOOD THING BARACK OBAMA DID NOT ALSO ASK THAT AMERICA RECEIVE THIS TOO: Hey mazel tov to the three Americans who have WON the Nobel Prize in Medicine and therefore the morning. It is also the first time that two lady scientists have shared the prize. “The three scientists won the prize for experiments that showed that the long thread-like molecules that carry genes inside every cell known as chromosomes have protective caps on their ends — like the protective tips on shoelaces — called telomeres, which are replenished with an enzyme known as telomerase.” TOO INSIDERY. [Washington Post]
Hell, I coulda told ‘em THAT.
So these caps have to be replenished all the time? Sounds socialist to me. Limbaugh will denounce telomeres and the Nobel committee in 3…2…1….
Cool, they discovered another amazing thing that GOD DID.
Telomeres bailouts? Let the free market decide!
Hot science-y women wearing ugly glasses and their hair in buns deserve more recognition than what they usually get only on the prOnsites.
Yeah yeah, big deal, we might live forever because of their research.
Let’s not forget the Ig Nobels.
http://www.sciencedirect.com/science?_ob=ArticleURL&_udi=B8CY1-4TVY5PW-1&_user=10&_rdoc=1&_fmt=&_orig=search&_sort=d&_docanchor=&view=c&_acct=C000050221&_version=1&_urlVersion=0&_userid=10&md5=622fa652012f3f82cb1f8523dd9b9e2a
This is awesome.
As a woman in the sciences I have to admit I am really excited to see two women get Nobels. For those that don’t work in academia, the magic of the tenure system means that we have a lot of old, crusty men with old, crusty ideas about women kicking around the university halls. So BOO-YA!
I’m going to go drink a TAB and listen to some Ani Difranco now.
Oops
forgot this link.
http://improbable.com/ig/winners/#ig2009
From the Weekly Standard newsroom: Fuck the Nobel committee and fuck America in 3, 2, 1…
When is Mr. Peabody going to get his long overdue Nobel for his achievements in time travel???
Monsieur Grumpe: I use telomerase to keep my beer fresh bewteen swings/swigs.
Monsieur Grumpe: Important research indeed, but I need to know the angle of the drop to believe that their research is conclusive. A more effective test than a drop might have been a swing.
Suck on that Rio!
Greider said she was doing laundry at 5am when she got the news she won the Nobel Prize.
Blackburn said when she got the news at 5am she was in her trailer chewing tobacco and making a YouTube video ranting against the president.
wimmins don’t know no science.
Clearly, they hate Jesus.
Monsieur Grumpe: Well, there’s only one response to that: http://www.cowdance.com/
shadowMark: Why are the Swedes so rude as to call the ladies when they are washing their delicates? More to the point, why are they calling anyone at 5:00 am?
mookworthjwilson: Hey Mookie! Watch the Nobel Committee pull a rabbit outta their hat!
Just so long as they are not allowed to vote.
Eglets. The protective bits on the end of shoelaces. I mention this because fuckin’ pop culture jacked nerds like me for “chad” and “hack” and I will never forget or forgive. They’re EGLETS, bitches!
BTW, “ferret” is a spying term of art, it refers to listening to people listening to radios, or eavesdropping on where and when beepers go off, et cetera.
Shrub fell in love with the idea of using satellites to “ferret out” terrorists, and apparently some dizzy wench on the Hill is ascared to interfere with our ability to “ferret” out anyone we damn well please, which probably isn’t helping our intel-sharing arrangements with the EU. You think either of these fishbulbs could pick out a ferret from a lineup including four weasels and a swamp rat? Yeah, me neither.
So we can live forever by replenishing our telomeres with telomerase. Translated from Illegal Nerd, this portends mass consumption of the cerebrospinal (CS) fluid of babies aborted at birth, the mass production of which President Baby-killer will now provide for by law.The law will also establish baby farms for the sole purpose of harvesting their CS juice, and robot farms for the harvesting of robot juice, which enhances the effectiveness of the infant CS juice when mixed at a ratio of 5-1 CS to robot juice. Any questions?
Too bad most Americans don’t know what a “shoelace” is any more.
hobospacejunkie: I should like mine in a basket with ribbons and bows and Hershey’s swoops. Tnkqu.
WadISay: Shoelaces are what Lilliputians use to make nooses for capital punishment, because miniature guns and miniature hypodermic needles are too expensive to produce for the few executions carried out annually in Lilliput.
So, all life is composed of those things on the end of shoelaces?
Given money(not my own) to Nobelists, Ignobelists, MacArthur Fellows. No wonder I can’t stand and won’t watch Fox media whores.
WadISay: You can’t expect people to use shoelaces when they can see their feet when they bend over.
More insidery goodness…telomeres are the reason Dolly the Cloned Sheep didn’t live to be Dolly the Old Sheep. She was born old, with frayed telomeres.
They won a Nobel Prize for discovering aglets?!?!?
This also led to the discovery of why we have 23 pairs of chromosomes when our nearest relatives, chimpanzees and bonobos, have 24. Our chromosome 2 has the remnants of a telomore in the middle of it — essentially two chromosomes fused to make one at some point.
Here’s a big wonky Wikipedia article about that: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chimpanzee_genome_project
hobospacejunkie: I strongly suspect telling the Right you want to drink their babies’s spinal fluid so that you can selfishly live forever is the kind of online rant Peggy Noonan warned us about over the weekend when she lamented the deaths of the Elders of Journalism and how they kept up the standards of public discourse. Peggy didn’t single out us at the Wonkette but she did say, “Everyone has a mic now, from the guy making YouTubes to the anonymous drunk on the comment thread.” I kind of felt she was looking straight at me.
SayItWithWookies: Why do these people waste all their fancy money on labs and stuff when they can just look this shit up in Wikipedia?
Katydid: Yes! The type of structured inquiry and diligent experimentation that these women conducted has no place in ‘post-thought’ America. Pass me mah Grizz anna cold Bud.
Holy Cow!!: The words of Jesus are under reconstruction, thanks to the good folks at Conservapedia’s Conservative Bible Project. (Sorry ’bout the threadjack, but this is too funny.)
GreenHalo: “Aglets,” actually, not eglets. I looked it up. http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/aglet?o=
I can haz Nobel Prize for spelling?
one of the winners is associated with the Howard Hughes Medical Institute. Wouldn’t Psychiatric Unit be a more apt way to remember the weirdo?
Lascauxcaveman, your kung fu is mightier than mine. On the other hand, I was off by one vowel, English is apparently an improv-comedy language these days, and — most important (debate team rules) — anyone who goes to the dictionary to prove a point has, ipso facto, a very small penis. That includes the girls. So, let’s call it a draw.
SayItWithWookies: and don’t forget the nine chromosomal segment inversions. This explains the popularity of the reverse cowgirl. Little-known fact.
SmutBoffin: Shorter Conservapedia Bible project: If it’s in the original and I like, DON’T TOUCH. If it’s in the original and I don’t like, WHY THE HELL HASN’T IT BEEN ACCURATELY TRANSLATED YET?
SmutBoffin: That’s great — especially since their new translation of the Bible is going to be based on the KJV. A retranslation from the original English — free of the corruption of those foul Middle-Easterners.
PsycGirl: Stop — you’re getting my centromeres all tingly.
Looking at the picture in the Post article, the Nobel Prize seems to have been awarded to two women and a statue. What is the Nobel committee trying to say?
SayItWithWookies: C’mon, think of the dirty talk potential!
“oohh, baby, your telomeres are sooooo looong”
“Come over here and I’ll show you how those chromosomal inversions happen”
WadISay: “the long thread-like molecules that carry genes inside every cell known as chromosomes have protective caps on their ends — like the protective tips on
shoelacesyour fluorescent orange Crocs — called telomeres,”PsycGirl: You know it’s a good night of geek love when you can slip “endoplasmic reticulum” into the pillowtalk. Oh, and reverse transcriptase also, since we’re on the reverse thing.
You haven’t lived until you’ve tried a BLT with some telomerase.
I hate it when my telomeres fall off. Makes it so hard to get the laces through the holes. Wait, what?
Lascauxcaveman: Thank you for clearing that up. Only time I use the word aglet is when working crossword puzzles. And here I thought I’d been misspelling apex, acme, and asap all of these years.
Monsieur Grumpe: This sounds like a project for Mythbusters.
And all this time I thought an Aglet was the offspring of a Texas A&M grad.
So telomerase is the stuff that holds genes together…fascinating but I was hoping this had some bearing on the global baconaise shortage…it doesn’t, does it?
Well, bravo for the ladies who won the prize but I would point out that none of them can make me a decent sandwich because of that other, larger problem I mentioned.
SayItWithWookies: Keep talking like that and my medulla oblongata may cease to function as it will be overwhelmed with gamma-amino-butyric acid. After which I will be thrown into geek prison or something.
GreenHalo: Sorry if I hurt your feelings. You made such a big deal of knowing the word, I thought you might also like to know the correct spelling.
PsycGirl: There are few things I enjoy more than getting a smart girl’s G protein-coupled receptors in a flutter. That and living through a velociraptor encounter.
SayItWithWookies: whoa, whoa, whoa! I didn’t know you were into second messenger systems and cascades. I feel a little dirty now.
What, like condoms for chromosomes?
PsycGirl: There I go again, always misjudging the transmembranic potential. Well, if you ever want to get post-synaptic, you know where to find me.
RoscoePColtraine: What do you think the T in BLT is anyway? Retard.
TGY: More like the black socks. All the hot chromosomal action is in the middle.
the problem child: What would happen to the Nobelles if they called Moammar Gadhafi at 5 a.m.?
DoktorZoom: A little-bitty, “Yah-hoo!”
So, it’s like the shell around a pistachio, right?
I am obliged to tell you that Elizabeth Blackburn is from Tasmania. Which is part of Australia.
In the words of our very famous cultural motto: Aussie Aussie Aussi, Oi Oi Oi!