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HAW HAW HAW

Secret Service Going After Some Facebook Dingbat

Here’s a wacky poll from the Facebook over the weekend. The Secret Service were informed and are now looking to kill the shit out of someone, perhaps the person who created this poll.

We’re surprised there aren’t 10,000 of these polls on the Facebook at all times, what with the “racism + Internet + basic typing ability” quandary so many have become acquainted with in recent years.

The Washington Post breaks the really bad news in all of this, however: “Because the application was disabled, the responses to the nonscientific polls are not available.”

Hey! Maybe the poll was crass, but how does that make it not Science?

Facebook poll: Should Obama be killed? [Political Carnival]


4:50 PM on Mon September 28 2009
By Jim Newell
10712 Views

  1. I’ve really had enough of this shit.

  2. Lascauxcaveman says at 4:52 pm, September 28th, 2009

    Sentenced to internet death for being not-funny.

  3. nader paul kucinich gravel says at 4:53 pm, September 28th, 2009

    JFK RFK MLK Malcolm…

    MSM ordered to censor G20.
    8 more years just like the last 8?
    Gates speaks as if he is a Cheney Clone.
    Judeofascists loved promoting their “Islamofascism” propaganda.
    Carrots(bribery) Sticks(murder) Coercive Diplomacy(extortion & blackmail).

    Did you see all the same bloodthirsty AIPAC-paid recycled neocon shills on TV selling more war for profit?

    Watch as they pretend to know nothing of the mounting 9/11 evidence, whistleblowers, & leaks that point to them

  4. Orly Taitz is going to cite this poll in her next motion.

  5. RoscoePColtraine says at 4:55 pm, September 28th, 2009

    Haha. Some wingnuts thought their internet activity was anonymous and untraceable.

  6. slappypaddy says at 4:56 pm, September 28th, 2009

    it is not science because it is not a controlled experiment, though it does now look like it’s being controlled. way controlled.

  7. CrunchyKnee says at 4:58 pm, September 28th, 2009

    I miss William McKinley, Jr.

  8. Jumping Jim says at 4:58 pm, September 28th, 2009

    nader paul kucinich gravel: You are crazy, but not my kind of crazy.

  9. Come here a minute says at 4:59 pm, September 28th, 2009

    should wonkett wield the banhammer?

    O nader
    O paul
    O kucinich
    O gravel

    nader paul kucinich gravel: Editors? Please?

  10. Speed Ball says at 5:00 pm, September 28th, 2009

    nader paul kucinich gravel: Are you one of those bots? Did the facebook poll crash you, and did The Wonkett link redirect you to the comments?

    Because, if so, please don’t come back.

  11. SayItWithWookies says at 5:01 pm, September 28th, 2009

    I want to propose an amendment to the healthcare bill that requires all Republicans to attend a remedial humor course. Someone’s gotta tell them this shit isn’t funny.

  12. RoscoePColtraine says at 5:02 pm, September 28th, 2009

    nader paul kucinich gravel: Um, I think you’re looking for HuffingtonPost.com. That’s the home of long-winded, left-wing, punctuation deprived, off-topic posts that aren’t funny.

  13. loquaciousmusic says at 5:02 pm, September 28th, 2009

    nader paul kucinich gravel: SkoalRebel? When did you get an account here?

  14. I find it harder and hard to believe some wing nut has not taken a pot shot at Barry.

    thankfully, the Secret service must be really, really, really good, and is in full time nipping it in the bud mood.

  15. Vote in the nader paul kucinich gravel poll:
    Should nader paul kucinich gravel be banned?
    o Yes
    o Maybe
    o If doesn’t start making with the funny
    o Yes

  16. Come here a minute: Can I vote twice?

  17. Rev. Peter Lemonjello says at 5:07 pm, September 28th, 2009

    Wow, it’s gotta be real tough for these dickholes to type with no opposable thumbs.

  18. Texan Bulldoggette says at 5:08 pm, September 28th, 2009

    WestEdEd: I hate to say it but I bet the SS hopes the white guy wins in 2012–they haven’t had to work this hard to keep a guy alive since…ever.

  19. George Oscar Bluth says at 5:08 pm, September 28th, 2009

    sezme: Let him stay. Maybe he can be the entertainment on slow news days. I suggest giving him his own column.

  20. nader paul kucinich gravel: ask them to test the ADS on you at the next G20. PLEASE.

  21. GreatOldOnesParty says at 5:10 pm, September 28th, 2009

    nader paul kucinich gravel: RON PAUL 2012!
    He can’t win don’t jizz yourself.
    He’s got a chance!
    Yeah, in France. Bet you’d vote for PALIN!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_QyYaPWasos

  22. Cherry Garcia says at 5:11 pm, September 28th, 2009

    Come here a minute: “D”: All of the Above - please!

  23. JadedDIssonance says at 5:12 pm, September 28th, 2009

    Yay Bannination!

    When I first heard of this, I was hoping against hope that the SS/FBI had planned it themselves. Now I remember that they’re not smart enough…can’t even save the freakin poll results! Buncha Intertube Rubes.

  24. Extemporanus says at 5:13 pm, September 28th, 2009

    You’ve gone too far this time, Nate Silver!

  25. Extemporanus says at 5:13 pm, September 28th, 2009

    nader paul kucinich gravel: The Aristocrats!

  26. slappypaddy says at 5:19 pm, September 28th, 2009

    WestEdEd: they are, and we are eternally in their debt. keep a light in the window for them.

  27. Roger the Shrubber says at 5:20 pm, September 28th, 2009

    The internet is the vomitorium of the modern age. People like to disgorge themselves of their respective bitterness.

  28. irisheyesagain says at 5:21 pm, September 28th, 2009

    BadKitty: I have nothing funny to add. It’s just appalling what passes for civil behavior.

  29. skoal rebel says at 5:22 pm, September 28th, 2009

    loquaciousmusic: taint me - yur gaigh. grumplefukkk

  30. El Pinche says at 5:23 pm, September 28th, 2009

    This facebook pollster will be the next common sense conservative hero. Let’s wait for the t-shirts and signs.

  31. JadedDIssonance says at 5:24 pm, September 28th, 2009

    The comments on this article over at wapo are pretty amazing too. What’s up with all the Assassination Supporters?

  32. skoal rebel says at 5:35 pm, September 28th, 2009

    all tha assinatin is cause nobamma is ruin the country and to all yall that dont like my videos you can fuckin get assinatid to cause america aint gonna stand for it much longer gay crybabby muslin aint even born in this country dont act like it aint true bitches

  33. Suds McKenzie says at 5:40 pm, September 28th, 2009

    Its the “basic typing ability” that “kills’ ‘em.

  34. i think you got the formula wrong, it should be “racism + basic typing ability = Internet”

  35. TheJerkStoreCalled says at 5:44 pm, September 28th, 2009

    El Pinche: Rep. Steve King (R-Iowa)will present him/her/them with the Golden Status Update at Take Back America 2010.

  36. GreatOldOnesParty says at 5:46 pm, September 28th, 2009
  37. AbstinenceOnly Ed says at 5:47 pm, September 28th, 2009

    THE HOLOCAUST WAS A MYTH. HITLER AND BILL SAFIRE FLEW 6 MILLION JEWS TO LIVE IN KOSHER KRATERS ON THE MOON!! ALSO MACDRE AND THE NATION OF THIZZRAEL DID 9/11!!! IT WAS AN NCYDE JOB!!!!!!11!!

    come visit my website, nytimes.com

  38. RoscoePColtraine says at 5:47 pm, September 28th, 2009

    skoal rebel: Roscoe is genuinely perplexed. Could be a very clever wonktard going undercover to make us laff….or could it really be….? I honestly don’t know.

  39. RoscoePColtraine says at 5:51 pm, September 28th, 2009

    skoal rebel: Jim, we need a ruling. Is this person’s IP address, perchance, in Kentucky? Oh, the fun we’re all about to have.

  40. Now the Progressives want to say that if you have a poll to off Obama, then you’re a racist. This is how white culture has come under attack.
    — Glennda of Beck

  41. RoscoePColtraine: One thing is certain: this one must never be banned.

  42. El Pinche says at 6:00 pm, September 28th, 2009

    RoscoePColtraine: “muslin” is a dead give away. I know my wonktards.

  43. AbstinenceOnly Ed says at 6:02 pm, September 28th, 2009

    S.Luggo: It doesn’t even matter if that’s a real quote or not, because all of his quotes are surreal.

  44. RoscoePColtraine: It’s Boomhauer.

  45. El Pinche says at 6:05 pm, September 28th, 2009

    RoscoePColtraine: I’d eat a bag of Copenhagen laced dicks to have the real skoalrebel guest edit on Wonkette for a day. He can redo the ad banners (Redman, NASCAR, Play-Doh , etc) and choose all topics. It would be glorious.

  46. RoscoePColtraine says at 6:06 pm, September 28th, 2009

    El Pinche: It’s a very good reproduction, I must say. Semi On-Topic, rambly. The incoherence is amazing — that’s very difficult to replicate. Mis-spellings are easy to fake, though.

  47. Crank Tango says at 6:06 pm, September 28th, 2009

    El Pinche: my sentiments exactly.

  48. Scruffy_The_Janitor says at 6:17 pm, September 28th, 2009

    All you need is tin foil on top of your head to get canned around here?
    Jeez….

  49. JooJoo Bee says at 6:18 pm, September 28th, 2009

    WestEdEd: “I find it harder and hard to believe some wing nut has not taken a pot shot at Barry.”

    They did, actually, but it was years ago, before there were Interwebz, so it doesn’t count.

  50. slappypaddy says at 6:20 pm, September 28th, 2009

    El Pinche: yeah. i scent the musk of masquerade. too much a mixture of the good, the bad, and the ugly. the genuine article would ring true when soundly rapped. this one… no, my crap detector’s going off.

  51. RoscoePColtraine says at 6:26 pm, September 28th, 2009

    slappypaddy: El Pinche: Yeah, but the content is so…nutty. I’m still not 100% convinced. We need scientific evidence.

  52. “If he cuts my healthcare” ? ?

    I need to read some rightwing sites. I am lost.

  53. To be candid, I’m not up on the law in this area. Can anyone tell me if the same issues would arise as to the following poll?:

    “Should former Vice President Richard “Dick” Cheney be tried at the World Criminal Court of The Hague, and then excuted by military firing squad shortly after his 15 minute trial is concluded?

    [ ] Yes.

    [ ] HELL yes.

    [ ] Not unless we have a raffle for the firing squad slots.

    [ ] Not unless someone else pays for the “sniper rifle” ammo. (That stuff’s EXPENSIVE.)

  54. Oh, and would your answer change if former President Bush’s forehead were used as the bullet backstop, rather than sandbags. (I mean, it’s not as if you could damage the former, and sandbags are expensive.)

  55. slappypaddy says at 6:51 pm, September 28th, 2009

    Neilist: wording and context may be crucial to demonstrating intent. i mean, look at where we are, we’re in wonkettia, a playground. and look at who we are, we’re wonketties. we probably couldn’t even hurt ourselves intentionally or without outside help. dastardly dickie snickers in our general direction, smirky monkey remains oblivious, and justice remains a distant dream that vanishes when one awakes.

  56. Whatever Blows Your Skirt says at 7:03 pm, September 28th, 2009

    RoscoePColtraine: Ditto, but here’s Hopin…

  57. Whatever Blows Your Skirt says at 7:24 pm, September 28th, 2009

    Whatever Blows Your Skirt: OH JEBUS… Does this mean I’m a “Ditto Head?” Also.

  58. Holding Out for a Hero says at 7:29 pm, September 28th, 2009

    I’m so tired of these mouth-breathing, cross-burning, sheet-wearing, knuckle-dragging because they just learned to walk upright, tea-bagging, lunatics that I’m ready to be my own death panel.

    (not really on the death panel part)

  59. skoal rebel says at 7:40 pm, September 28th, 2009

    Holding Out for a Hero: im tired of winey ass liebearals bitchin about wantin to turn america to socalism trehuggin hippy raisin taxes on cigs to $5 a pack hell they probably gonna be like 12bucks a pack by the time nobamma gets kicked out of office for ruinin this country with the way the economys goin so ill death panal you bitch

  60. theevilmonkey says at 7:57 pm, September 28th, 2009

    There is no way on earth he’ll ever be assassinated. He will fulfill his destiny as the worst, single term President in US history.
    God forbid we have to put up with tree hugging,chardonnay sipping, liberal hippies, sitting around with lighted candles in their hands singing Kumbaya and Imagine and making him out to be some modern day Martin Luther King or JKF. Another 60 years of conspiracy theories about this muppet? It’s definitely not worth it. Its just as likely some pansy assed liberal from Obama’s thugs at ACORN whipped that poll up. As for the Secret Service tracking down the perpetrator..umm…aren’t they still looking for that kid who whipped up the Obama Joker Socialism posters?

  61. Holding Out for a Hero says at 8:17 pm, September 28th, 2009

    skoal rebel: Nicely done - spelling errors and no punctuation. Be careful where you spit your dip.

  62. SayItWithWookies says at 8:19 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: Republican driving lesson:
    If a Republican gets behind the wheel and drives off a cliff while fiddling with the radio, it’s called “keeping us safe since right after we hit the ground in a second.”
    If a Democrat gets behind the wheel and dashes around a rockslide, rescues a young maiden from a pride of hungry lions and warns a small town about an oncoming tornado, it’s called “destroying the very foundations of the vehicle.”

  63. RoscoePColtraine says at 8:20 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: The Secret Service get involved when a retard draws a poster? I’ll be durned. However, I do believe, my easily frightened, logically-challenged friend, that tracking down a person who invented a poll on facebook is a rather simple, straightforward process. The mystery won’t last as long as the time it took for you to graduate kindeegarden.

  64. theevilmonkey says at 8:35 pm, September 28th, 2009

    skoal rebel, your ciggies are going to be a bargain at 12 bucks a pack. Obamugabe’s multi TRILLION dollar ’stimulus’ package (how many trees do you have to chop down to print multi trillions of dollars you JOKES?!)will ensure that the hyperinflation that’s coming will see the Chinese and the rest of the world drop your Dollar and your Treasuries like dogcrap, whilst Obamugabe keeps writing out the cheques for health care and cap and trade with no money in the bank. You are screwed pal.

  65. EdFlinstone says at 8:38 pm, September 28th, 2009

    Now who would of thunk that Faux News would have to take down their comments section to this story. Personally Im shocked.

  66. dogscantlookup says at 8:42 pm, September 28th, 2009

    Neilist: dude dats not kool u gonnas get us introuble again

  67. BlueStateLibtard says at 8:42 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: You were good until you used the word “perpetrator”… that is way too sophisticated a word for a red-stater. And you spelled it correctly. Skoal rebel you’re clearly a Wonktard…as you haven’t used ALL CAPS even once. Dead give-away.

  68. theevilmonkey says at 8:43 pm, September 28th, 2009

    RoscoePColtraine: I stand corrected. They’re not looking for that kid. They are still going through all the emails they received at the White House in response to Macon Phillips’ request for members of the public to forward questionable claims to the administration about health insurance reform. You remember it don’t you? In case it slipped your convenient memory and so you can reassure my easily frightened nature, I’ve included it below.

    “There is a lot of disinformation about health insurance reform out there, spanning from control of personal finances to end of life care. These rumors often travel just below the surface via chain emails or through casual conversation,” said Phillips.

    “Since we can?t keep track of all of them here at the White House, we?re asking for your help. If you get an email or see something on the web about health insurance reform that seems fishy, send it to flag@whitehouse.gov,” said Philips.

  69. dogscantlookup says at 8:52 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: laugh while you can monkey boy. oh and Obamugabe, that is a good one cus Obama has the death squads murdering the opposition just like Mugabe uh wait Obama dosn’t, He uses law enforcement and the constitution (mostly) tardly mctardison

  70. theevilmonkey says at 9:02 pm, September 28th, 2009

    dogscantlookup: The Obamugabe reference is in relation to hyperinflation (you only have to comprehend the context in which it was presented). Or have you suddenly acquired Maureen Dowd’s clairvoyance to be able to read whats on my mind and brand me a racist? Sticks and stones and all that. If you have acquired Dowd’s clairvoyant abilities, I’d rather you just gave me next week’s lottery numbers thanks, rather than make implications that simply don’t exist.

  71. dogscantlookup says at 9:03 pm, September 28th, 2009

    I meant to say Obama uses law enforcement and the constitution (mostly) to prosecute threats and to the protect us, the U.S. and the government mostly you tardly mctardison tard esquire

  72. SayItWithWookies says at 9:05 pm, September 28th, 2009
  73. dogscantlookup says at 9:06 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: troll where did I call or label you a racist? and the numbers are 25 4 98 6

  74. Hoo hoo!

    I can’t wait to hear the howls of “socialism” when the Secret Service straps on the latex glove and says hi to the guy who created this and everyone who said “yes.”

    Enjoy your week, jerks.

    http://marmel.com/2009/09/moron-asks-in-poll-if-obama-should-be-killed-enjoy-jail-idiot/

  75. RoscoePColtraine says at 9:09 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: You’re afraid of a white house email account where a person can voluntarily send rumors they hear regarding health care reform, and thereby receive clarification and/or verification? I’m not sure I understood you, but if that’s the case, I doubt there’s much I can say to make you feel better. But, I’ll try by saying they won’t be coming for you yet, evilmonkey.

    Regarding the facebook poll, virtually any dullard with access to the appropriate and pertinent database and member information could probably trace the origin within an hour. Two, if the administrator/creator made an attempt to cover their tracks. The Secret Service likes to follow-up on threats (real or perceived) to the President, and their jurisdiction and powers to investigate are fairly…liberal, I’d suspect. I’m not sure why you’re mixing up the Secret Service with the White House Office for New Media.

  76. EdFlinstone says at 9:11 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: Here in real Merika its spelled “checks”. I guess cheques is some sort of faggy socialist foreign spellin. I do give you props for only holding the caps lock button down twice which is really exceptional for a wingnut. I know its a hard urge to fight and you only gave in to it twice. I think it takes as many trees as it does to spend a trillion on war over imaginary weapons of mass destruction. Only a few thousand less soldiers die. But please go ahead and argue for Hoover economics, cause that dude rocked. As for the deficits, I only wish hopey could match the balance budgets of Ronnie, and the Bushes, oh wait, they never did balance a budget. But please continue, your hypocrisy is astounding.

  77. dogscantlookup says at 9:15 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: our dollar is so worth 1,000,000,000% less than under Bush. I am so wrong I think that printing more money for no good reason is wrong just like I think it was wrong to cut taxes for the rich in a war and losing billions of $ in cargo plane loads was wrong, you hyperbolic pig aids vector. want more food troll I know I should not feed it but its big dead shark eyes say more more more

  78. theevilmonkey says at 9:16 pm, September 28th, 2009

    SayItWithWookies: Thanks for setting me straight on the facts. Of course you can also tell me what the impact of food prices will be after all that land has to be re-allocated away from food production to produce the extra cotton that will be required to print those multi trillions of dollars? I think you already tried something similar recently with the re-allocation of food producing land to produce bio-fuels. As I recall it sent the price of agricultural commodities soaring. Oh sorry, that was the fault of speculators (your world doesn’t work unless you can find someone else to blame). In the fairytale world of the left, the laws of supply and demand don’t operate, nor do the laws of logic.

  79. AbstinenceOnly Ed says at 9:18 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: You, sir, have the mental acuity of a Chris Griffin, but the megalomania and baby wang of a Stewy. Nicely done!

  80. theevilmonkey says at 9:20 pm, September 28th, 2009

    dogscantlookup: I didn’t say you called me a racist. I said since you seemed to know what was on my mind, you probably were going to continue down the path that, since I dare to disagree with your Messiah, I must be a racist. Thanks for the lottery numbers. If I wasn’t certain you had a ticket already, I’d give you a cut.

  81. EdFlinstone says at 9:21 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: You forgot brie and volvo driving. Gotta have brie and volvos in one of those rants.

  82. SayItWithWookies says at 9:23 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: Oh joy — two in a row:

    GENEVA, Switzerland, October 2006: Subsidies to biofuels have reached record levels in the United States and are a costly way of achieving public policy objectives, according to a report launched in October 2006 by the GSI.

    Let’s see — now who was in charge of both the House and the Senate for the six years ending in November, 2006? Oh yeah — Republicans.

    As y’all are so fond of saying: Own it.

    http://www.globalsubsidies.org/en/research/biofuel-subsidies-united-states

  83. dogscantlookup says at 9:23 pm, September 28th, 2009

    cotton? cotton! COTTON!!! you racist! just using your logic

  84. RoscoePColtraine says at 9:23 pm, September 28th, 2009

    SayItWithWookies: For the love of Baby Jeebus, don’t try to sift through that last heap of word salad prepared by theevilmonkey. It will drag you into a black hole of logic from which light itself cannot escape. I came perilously close myself.

  85. SayItWithWookies says at 9:26 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: Oh, and thanks for validating my theory that if you’re bad with facts in one possibly trivial sense, you’re probably bad with facts in general.
    I also have this theory that the better you are with facts and critical analysis, the more likely you are to be a liberal. Wanna help with that one, too?

  86. dogscantlookup says at 9:26 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: “Or have you suddenly acquired Maureen Dowd’s clairvoyance to be able to read whats on my mind and brand me a racist?” reptard cant recall what you wrote? bag o salty rat dicks for you by usps, not fedex

  87. SayItWithWookies says at 9:29 pm, September 28th, 2009

    RoscoePColtraine: Aw, no sweat. It’s like taking money from an evangelical birfer with a Beanie Baby collection and a Q-Ray bracelet.

  88. dogscantlookup says at 9:31 pm, September 28th, 2009

    RoscoePColtraine: too late I am there I can’t think just rage rage mindless rage! I can feel its thoughts and I feel I feel stupid

  89. skoal rebel says at 9:34 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: WHATDOYOUMEAN - CHINNESE CIGS! we gotta do somehting about nobamma now i mean now because im not smoking no chinese cigs but theyre just more socalist the we even are but not for long cause are country is going to hell real quick

  90. theevilmonkey says at 9:37 pm, September 28th, 2009

    LMAO here. You angry, hateful, spiteful, little people. Resorting to personal insults. That’s quality. I look forward to checking in on your parallel universe again later, where the laws of supply and demand don’t operate. Where you always have someone on standby that you can blame when you don’t get your way, and where all those nice societies that in reality, hate everything you stand for (i.e. Islam), really they just want to peacefully co-exist with you, if only you’d be nicer to them. Try as you might you can’t wish away your Messiah’s approval rating since he took office. Its terminal fellas. Good luck.

  91. dogscantlookup says at 9:39 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: “You angry, hateful, spiteful, little people. Resorting to personal insults. That’s quality” Quality? Quality? This Is Wonkette!!!

  92. skoal rebel says at 9:39 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: i aint insultin shit im just not buyin no chinese cigs from no muslin

  93. glamourdammerung says at 9:40 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: When you start off by personally insulting people then cry about people being “hateful” towards you, it really comes off like a combination of low intelligence and a persecution complex.

  94. SayItWithWookies says at 9:40 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey:
    50% = terminal
    23% = leadership
    theevilmonkey = priceless

  95. EdFlinstone says at 9:44 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: Sorry but I cant resist, but when you said this “In the fairytale world of the left, the laws of supply and demand don’t operate, nor do the laws of logic”. Would that be the world where gas went to 4 bucks while supply went up and demand went down?

  96. RoscoePColtraine says at 9:54 pm, September 28th, 2009

    Obama’s approval rating is down, in no small part, due to all the libruls like myself who tell the pollsters they disapprove of his handling of healthcare reform. And we’ll probably all show up in 2012 to vote against Mike Huckabee, so, there’s that little fact for conservtards to keep in mind when going off about Obama’s numbers.

  97. theevilmonkey says at 9:55 pm, September 28th, 2009

    glamourdammerung: “like a combination of low intelligence and a persecution complex”. Ah yes, the liberal way of changing minds and hearts. That arrogant air of intellectual superiority. Nice work. Neat.

  98. theevilmonkey: This barrage of babble is unbearable.
    I speak 3 languages and I’m still trying to figure out what you’re on about. Take that shit to Facebook, you sanctimonious hypocrite.

  99. theevilmonkey says at 9:58 pm, September 28th, 2009

    BMK: Shouldn’t you be busy elsewhere trying to get Polanski, the convicted child rapist, released from jail you liberal elitist hypocrite?

  100. skoal rebel says at 10:00 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: thats right buddy librals are always onto me but they dont see whats happening to real americans. tell em

  101. the problem child says at 10:09 pm, September 28th, 2009

    Would it be too much to ask for a second banhammer to fall tonight? The lack of snark and the pure stoopid are really quite appalling. And the ahammer probably isn’t even back in our blogmaster’s pants,yet.

  102. skoal rebel says at 10:09 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: lmfao polak. this ones good a polak has to paint the lines on the road. day 1 polak paints ten miles, his boss buys him a stripper, day2, he just did five, day3, he painted only a mile of the road. his bos says wtf. polak says bitch that paint bucket gets further away every day mothafucka

  103. SayItWithWookies says at 10:10 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: Wow, that’s all you got? Thanks for validating my theory that when you’re out of ideas, you shouldn’t advertise the fact.

  104. dogscantlookup says at 10:12 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: yes we all are more intellectualy superior to you dumb de dumb dumb, and I my self am a dropout and make less than 10k a year and I laugh at your shitbrainness. So how would you vote on that poll you racist you?

  105. Bathroom Goblin says at 10:45 pm, September 28th, 2009

    Skoal Rebel, I’d pop your man cherry, if yer cousin hadn’t already.

  106. slappypaddy says at 10:45 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: peggy? peggy? is that you?

  107. theevilmonkey: I think it’s adorable how you keep coming back, after having been violently eviscerated. Your perennial retch is surpassed only by your breathtaking ignorance. Do some research and get your shit together. Google is your friend.

  108. ladymacbeth says at 10:55 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: dude, ‘chardonnay’? ‘chardonnay’!?!??

    ssssooooooo 1976.

    we francoise, we pansy liberal elites, we are all south african wines now. or possibly Albariño. or a tangy chateauneuf du pape.

    jeeez.

  109. deecaffeinated says at 10:59 pm, September 28th, 2009

    Wignuttery on my feed is also merrily brewing, although at a moderately less racist rate. http://i33.tinypic.com/huj5tv.png

  110. villageatrois says at 11:01 pm, September 28th, 2009

    Hey where were the “should he be killed?” polls during the Dubya administration?

    Oh, yeah, right here. And I voted yes, without reservation, and still do.

    My bad. Secret Service, call me. I haven’t changed my mind.

  111. slappypaddy says at 11:03 pm, September 28th, 2009

    skoal rebel: what are you talking about?

  112. slappypaddy says at 11:05 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: pansy-assed thugs, now there’s an interesting picture.

  113. slappypaddy says at 11:06 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: do you have any clue what money is and how it exists?

  114. SayItWithWookies says at 11:09 pm, September 28th, 2009

    ladymacbeth: South Africa? For that kind of carbon offset I could get a locally-grown Viognier.

  115. slappypaddy says at 11:09 pm, September 28th, 2009

    skoal rebel: so what are you going to do about obama now i mean now? you stepping up? you throwing down?

  116. slappypaddy says at 11:11 pm, September 28th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: you are not where you think you are.

  117. slappypaddy says at 11:14 pm, September 28th, 2009

    skoal rebel: always is a long time. what’s a real american? what’s a liberal? what’s a buddy?

  118. dogscantlookup says at 11:17 pm, September 28th, 2009

    ladymacbeth: iz like dat dere yellowtail frum dat austraili/abo cunttree as that copohagan/dogshit guy would say if it drank the fine wine, 12$ fine it’ still good it gets you drunk

  119. slappypaddy says at 11:17 pm, September 28th, 2009

    skoal rebel: how do you know?

  120. slappypaddy says at 11:20 pm, September 28th, 2009

    skoal rebel: day 4, i bet you learned something about how not to talk to your boss. any luck finding a new job yet?

  121. ladymacbeth says at 11:21 pm, September 28th, 2009

    SayItWithWookies: and i would, sadly, take it.

  122. BobTheBuilder says at 11:36 pm, September 28th, 2009

    I don’t believe for one second that “Skoal Rebel” on this forum is the REAL SkoalRebel.

    Too much “Muslin” instead of “Muslim.” Once is believable, just like the classic “Morans” sign was believable. But over and over again is, well, just tiresome, overdone performance art.

    Another sign of fakery: dedicated SkoalRebel investigators know from his YouTube channel that this individual has no interests or talents other than dipping truly astounding quantities of snuff. He has no known interest whatsoever in cigarettes.

    Now if Wonkette’s “Skoal Rebel” were to start engaging in some Freudian slips exposing deep-seated homosexuality, THAT would be a little more entertaining.

  123. BobTheBuilder says at 11:38 pm, September 28th, 2009

    PS: It’s nice to know that the moron who wrote that poll and at least any person who responded in the affirmative will now be on the Secret Service’s permanent watch list - and maybe terrorist list. I hope they get delayed by strip searches on every airplane trip they ever take again for the rest of their lives.

  124. SayItWithWookies says at 11:38 pm, September 28th, 2009

    ladymacbeth: There’s a lot to be said for good cheap local wine. And there’s variability everywhere, so really, if you live somewhere good for vineyards, you may as well drink local. But if you don’t, don’t. I was visiting a friend in Detroit a few years ago, and at dinner I got a bottle of a Michigan wine, which I didn’t know even existed. They were brave but foolish, those Michigan vintners.

  125. Crank Tango says at 11:57 pm, September 28th, 2009

    skoal rebel: I have been wondering, how does one pronounce “froedge” anyway? Does that rhyme with fudge?

  126. CARCUNTZ!(tm)-R-Us says at 11:57 pm, September 28th, 2009

    Neilist: OPSHUN D IZ SOSHULIZMS! We pay fer it arsevles!!!11!

  127. dogscantlookup says at 12:14 am, September 29th, 2009

    BobTheBuilder: shsssssh its like the bullshit ghost shows on the tv, don’t watch just laugh at the believers

  128. glamourdammerung says at 1:01 am, September 29th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: I am sorry the truth hurts. But as I stated before, you did start off by insulting people and then started crying about how mean old everybody was picking on you.

  129. glamourdammerung says at 1:05 am, September 29th, 2009

    The more unintentionally ironic thing about this whole affair is going to be how the morons that setup the poll and their supporters are going to start crying about being “picked on for no reason” instead of taking any personal responsibility for their actions.

  130. TheJerkStoreCalled says at 1:07 am, September 29th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: Aww, come back, I was enjoying the train wreck.

  131. TheJerkStoreCalled says at 1:09 am, September 29th, 2009

    RoscoePColtraine: I wish they’d get involved with the retard this post has drawn.

  132. LoweredPeninsula says at 2:16 am, September 29th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: Oh, boy. Calling us Muslim, Obama our Messiah, etc…you are nucking futs, my friend. May you and your Messiah (Jesus H. Christ) gay marry, and then marry Moses and Mohammad as fellow “sister wives”.

  133. Jukesgrrl says at 2:36 am, September 29th, 2009

    slappypaddy: >>wording and context may be crucial to demonstrating intent. i mean, look at where we are, we’re in wonkettia, a playground. and look at who we are, we’re wonketties. we probably couldn’t even hurt ourselves intentionally or without outside help. dastardly dickie snickers in our general direction, smirky monkey remains oblivious, and justice remains a distant dream that vanishes when one awakes.<<

    Don’t tell me … those are the words of an obscure Doors song.

  134. SayItWithWookies says at 2:57 am, September 29th, 2009

    Jukesgrrl: “The Hoarse Platitudes,” maybe.

  135. gurukalehuru says at 4:55 am, September 29th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: We don’t need to be able to read what’s on your mind to brand you a racist. Racist.

  136. gurukalehuru says at 5:07 am, September 29th, 2009

    Oooooh, spank that evil monkey.

  137. Grandpa Cornpants says at 8:53 am, September 29th, 2009

    theevilmonkey: “He will fulfill his destiny as the worst, single term President in US history.”

    Rather clairvoyant, one must admit.

    What a challenge to try and top the last eight years of epic failure in just four short years.

    Just keep those prayers going. Jesus will cry if you don’t.

  138. slappypaddy says at 8:55 am, September 29th, 2009

    Jukesgrrl: “the words of an obscure Doors song.”

    no one will forgive us
    for wasting the dawn

  139. SayWhatNow says at 9:03 am, September 29th, 2009

    Let’s not kid ourselves, guys– the right does not have a monopoly on Klan-like tendencies . The Death Poll in question could’ve just as easily been created by a liberal bigot who will soon tell us it was all in the name of satire.

  140. glamourdammerung says at 9:38 am, September 29th, 2009

    SayWhatNow: Just like how Mr. Sparkman killed himself by beating himself to death, then binding his feet and hands, hanging himself, and writing “fed” on his chest to frame the right wing lunatics?

  141. skoal rebel says at 9:57 am, September 29th, 2009

    BobTheBuilder: not my fault daddy always ended up at some truck stop with a peter in his mouth the devil liebrals aint turnin me gay again

  142. DustBowlBlues says at 10:07 am, September 29th, 2009

    Hahahah. I’m reading this the day after, and weird guy has been banned. I’m laughing at you, dingbat!

    As to this poll, my advice for the person(s) who posted it: If you’ve ever yearned for a certain barbeque joint’s food, but were afraid to go into the scary part of town where’s it’s sold, now would be the perfect time to do it while you still have Secret Service Protection. Lemons to ‘nade!

    I read this on the CSM site and of course, a couple of conservatives cited death threats against Bush. Nah. Doesn’t work. Nothing said about that douche was a virulent as the attacks on BHO. You lose.

  143. eclecticbrotha says at 11:17 am, September 29th, 2009

    I voted in the poll before it was disabled just to see how many others did and the results. Over 700 participated, with nearly 700 “no” votes. There were a few “yes
    ” and “maybe” votes but nothing went into double digits. Its nice of Facebook to disable the app itself; they have effectively destroyed the villagers’ ability to Freep all the other polls they created with it.

  144. SayWhatNow says at 12:37 pm, September 29th, 2009

    glamourdammerung: Dude, I’m not saying the right wing isn’t racist. I’m just saying the left wing is ALSO racist. Being the token “[insert minority here] friend” has given me special insight into the matter.

  145. Cheney Guevara says at 2:28 pm, September 29th, 2009

    SayWhatNow:

    “Everyone’s a little bit racist
    Sometimes.
    Doesn’t mean we go
    Around committing hate crimes.
    Look around and you will find
    No one’s really color blind.
    Maybe it’s a fact
    We all should face
    Everyone makes judgments
    Based on race.”

    –Kate Monster, Avenue Q

  146. glamourdammerung says at 6:28 pm, September 29th, 2009

    SayWhatNow: Yeah, that “liberal media” is was always out telling folks to kill Bush.

    You might want to think about that “special insight” you think you have.

  147. SayWhatNow says at 9:00 pm, September 29th, 2009

    So…the consensus is that liberals don’t do hateful shit? So liberal democrats voting for a war in Iraq or increased militirization at the US/Mexico border is…what? To us brown people it just looks like the same ol’ shit everyone thinks only exists below the Mason/Dixon line. There may be more violent racists on the right, but in the progressive circles I roll in there’s certainly no shortage of race-based assault and harassment. Especially the kind where liberal white dudes treat brown women like their personal play-things.

  148. glamourdammerung says at 9:27 pm, September 29th, 2009

    SayWhatNow: The consensus is that I pointed out your false equivalency and you are now trying to move the goalpost by changing the subject.

  149. SayWhatNow says at 11:06 am, September 30th, 2009

    In all seriousness, I don’t see where I was inconsistent. My first comment says that I think liberals can also be racist and violent and a lot of times try to cover up their racism by claiming “satire.” Then I got the impression that people were saying that, yeah, everyone’s kinda racist but liberals don’t commit hate crimes like conservatives do. And then I disagreed and gave some examples of stuff liberals do that I think are hateful and violent and motivated by racism. I don’t think there’s some big liberal conspiracy to frame republicans for racist attacks. What I was trying to say, but maybe didn’t get across, is that I think when liberals get called out on their racism a trendy excuse is to say they were trying to be “ironic.” And I thought this poll could be one of those situations. Maybe you thought that my comment was minimizing the racist hatred right-wingers fling at Obama? That’s a fair critique and I think I can see where you got that impression. But my actual opinion is that there are left-wingers who also hate having a Black man as President and that’s really all I was trying to say.

    Sorry for this Snark Fail of a comment. I just really don’t like being confused when people tell me something I’ve said is f*cked up. Cuz I generally try to avoid saying f*cked up things and welcome all assistance in that endeavor.

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