Wonkette
It’s a bit early in the day, but if you can stomach it here is a short clip featuring three (3) of our favorite charlatans: Ann Coulter, Geraldo Rivera, and Al Sharpton. Apparently Geraldo calls Coulter an “opportunist” toward the end of this thing, but we were distracted by our own speculation about what happened to the old Al Sharpton, the one who would have eaten this shrunken new morsel of an Al Sharpton for breakfast along with some grits and white gravy. [The YouTubes]
You know you are in the middle of some kind of simian poo-flinging when Al Sharpton looks like the elder statesman in the group.
Who is that long haired blonde man seemingly not wearing a shirt???
To: Wonkette Editors
From: Norbizness
Re: Post Title
No.
–N
———————–
“Laugh while you can, monkey boy!”
Reminds me of what my great grandmother used to say: feces smells from the bottom up.
Does Ann ever inhale?
Wow. Ann Coulter really does have an Adam’s apple. It’s a sad day for the transgendered community.
Ann Coulter’s voice blows my mind; even more than what she says. It’s like some sci-fi movie robotic/human voice. It sounds heavily processed — the tone is similar to the sound made by rubbing two balloons together.
Isn’t Mann Coltface the same “person” who said, a couple years ago, that any criticism of the President during a time of was was treason?
Coulter still looks like she has “lazy eye.” Wasn’t that eye patch she used to wear supposed to cure that? I wonder if eye patches would be covered medical devices or equipment under Obamacare.
Better ask the quitter.
memzilla: war, that is.
Put Coulter and Sharpton in the Octogon and let them duke it out…a true death match. The world would be better for it. The Skanky Bitch and the Bovine Blowhard.
mookworthjwilson: I believe it’s Edgar Winter.
This is like that KFC Double Down Sandwich thingy. More bloat, less substance.
I just retweeted this to a twitter account designed to automatically retweet all tweets, thereby ensuring the end of space-time as we know it.
Ann Coulter is like 75 isn’t she?
Aaaaagh!!! My eyes!!! Too early!!!!
Jerry Rivers calling (M)Ann Coulter an opportunist?
Mr. Jerry “Hey, let’s blow up Capone’s Vault and Hey, let’s put Racist Skinheads and Black Power Types on stage at the same time with throwable furniture!” Rivers?
ManchuCandidate: Don’t forget broadcasting the position of your imbedded troops live on international television.
When Mann Coulter speaks, I hear this character’s voice:
http://reviews.goldenagecartoons.com/2006/bazooka/beakybuzzard.jpg
Why’s it gotta be WHITE gravy, huh?
Sweeeeet leopard print cocktail dress under that wig, I mean hair.
It’s never too early to watch Coulter, but today it’ll just have to wait until I finish my piping hot cup of Drano and battery acid.
Ann’s hair and makeup are just fabulous. Every detail just perfect. She really does pass for a gal.
ManchuCandidate:
Hey, this Jerry Rivers, Barry Obama, Bobby whatever-the-fuck-his-name-was-before-it-was-Dylan thing is old and stupid and who gives a fuck about it, really? The day American nativist assholes stop punishing kids for having latin names is the day you can begin to mouth off about what an opportunist “Jerry Rivers” is without being a complete asshole yourself. Have a nice day.
Grits? That’s racist.
Call it polenta and sell it for $9.99 at Whole Foods.
She’s not going to be able to carry off this “Crying Game” shit too much longer.
Teh Bouche: Except she smells like armpits and santorum. but other than she’s almost prettier than a tranny!!
:)
artbot2000:
Geraldo?
Why don’t they just dress three guys up in Yoda outfits and have them hit each other with trouts. It would probably be a more enlightening experiance.
artbot2000: …so says a guy who sounds like a complete asshole…someone doesn’t have their snark detector on…
Watch These Terrible People Fapping At Each Other
fixed.
Ah ha! mookworthjwilson: The name on his birth certificate is “Gerald Riviera.” But his Jewish mother wanted to name him “Sidney.” I’ll trust Snopes on it.
Isn’t she like that evil clown in “It”? If we don’t believe in her she might just go away.
I am told looking up and to the right is indicative of lying. Judging from her eye motions in that clip, she is lying her ass off…..or she’s having a stroke. I’m a little torn as to which to hope for.
SendLawyersGunsAndMoney: Which is which?
artbot2000: Are you lost? Where did you think you were?
mookworthjwilson: That long-haired blonde man just got back from Berlin where he won the women’s long jump. IAAF officials will be verifying his gender this week.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KZbz2NcfLrY
liquiddaddy: You have no idea how sadly truthful that is.
I DEMAND TO SEE ANN COULTER BIRTH CERTIFICANT! LONG FORM!! WHY WONT SHE LET AMERICA WHAT HER REAL FIRST NAME IS? HENGH? WHAT IS SHE HIDING??!!1?!
What exactly was Mann Cuntler flexing her Adam’s apple about? Oh wait, I stopped giving a shit about what she said back in 1997. Carry on, nothing to see here.
Menage a twats.
Better American Than You: But is it the long form???
Geraldo Rivera calls Ann Counter “opportunistic”? Isn’t that the pot calling the kettle black? Or have I played the cast-iron card?
Ann Coulter is an anagram for “No Real Cunt.”
45 seconds of my life gone forever. If a clue were to somehow mistakenly drop into their midst it would die of neglect.
But it’s sort of fun to speculate on which one will hit the Reality TeeVee / Home Shopping Network / Pilates Machine Infomercial circuit first.
Coulter, Rivera and Sharpton are all complete morons–and none of them belong on television. They belong on the “Cast Away” island, with all of the others.
thefrontpage: Sharpton is actually NOT a moron. He just plays one on teevee. I’m not sayin’ anything about his character, mind you, but his brain works fine.
Gopherit: She’s just making shit up as it comes to her. Can she cite even one instance where the MSM has accused someone of racism for criticizing Obama’s healthcare reform goals? Of course not. She’s just got her narrative and she’s sticking to it. Kind of what Fuck Toad accused Jeremy Scahill of doing on Maher the other night. Our public discourse is so pathetic. Is 9:30 on Monday morning too early to start drinking?
edgydrifter: let’s see the birth certificate Ann! Or should I say Andrew!?!
God bless the boondocks. If I got a chane to “debate” Ann on the Tv. No matter what the topic, during one of her long”nannynannybooboo” rants I’d break in with. I know trannies Ann Coulter and you Sir are no tranny.
this post and all of its breakfast food references does nothing but further solidify my love for Sara.
Thank you for the recommendation, but I ended up not watching it. Good bye.
muckpond: Nobody doesn’t like Sara……. Lee.
After all these many years, I still haven’t seen any baby pics/young pics of Ann Coulter. Still as wretched as ever whatever her “classification” is. Poor Al, I don’t think he’s been that thin since he was 7.
Ann, is that a gun in your coctail dress or are you just looking forward to the 2010 elections?
Ann Coulter kinda looks like that KFC double down sandwhich if she was placed horizontally…
Someday, some poor slob will take a swing at Andy Coulter, and this repressed, gender confused freak will respond with the finely-tuned reflexes of the sleep deprived, razor-nerved meth tweaker and his rage will prevail–he’ll probably kill someone on camera before all is said & done. It’ll be the ultimate Fox News denouement—once again in SLO MO…
Better American Than You: OMG!!! that’s the best thing i’ve ever heard! ever ever ever!!!
drpangloss: I have a similar fantasy. Ann’s squawking some bullshit, I’m waiting patiently on the other side of the little screen divider. Then when she finishes and it’s my turn, I say to Geraldo, “Jeez, where did you FIND this guy?”
why are these people still in the public eye? glenn beck provides everything we need.
artbot2000: Actually, he referred to himself as Jerry all during his childhood and only changed his name to Geraldo sometime in the late ’60s/early ’70s. I remember him saying that during an interview with Terry Gross or something. So, Mr. M. Candidate is completely in the right here. Why I remember such random facts is beyond me…
One of these things is not like the other…
Sharpton, for once, looks out of place for all of the right reasons. God bless James Brown’s former body man, and God bless America!
Better American Than You (sorry, there’s no “Reply” next to your comment): “Ann Coulter is an anagram for ‘No Real Cunt’” is mind-blowingly perfect. These immortal words need to be better publicized than an obscure comment in an ephemeral Wonkette post.