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BECAUSE IT IS CRUEL

Paranoid Obama Nut Has Special Request Regarding Routine Poisonings

The request is to knock it off.In lieu of your usual daily White House Flickr foto, here’s some leftist (?) propaganda straight from a DC cabbie. Poisoning food and drinks again, eh, CIA? You couldn’t outsource that to Blackwater? (Thanks to “Matt” and his iPhone for sending this along.)


11:06 AM on Fri August 21 2009
By Sara K. Smith
1399 Views

  1. ManchuCandidate says at 11:09 am, August 21st, 2009

    Someone forgot to wear their tinfoil hat today.

  2. Sorry, but you have to be cruel to be kind.

    The font mix in that note is pretty special, though.

  3. dum librul says at 11:10 am, August 21st, 2009

    That mug was poisoned with Hope.

  4. SayItWithWookies says at 11:12 am, August 21st, 2009

    Kristen Atkinson’s inside source revealed!

  5. Chickensmack says at 11:13 am, August 21st, 2009

    Kat Hak Sung must troll, even if he loses his Internets for two months.

  6. Did the cabbie look like Mel Gibson?

  7. freakishlystrong says at 11:16 am, August 21st, 2009

    This DC Cabbie is obviously a muslin terr’ist.

  8. OK, which one of you guys is this?

  9. Johnny Zhivago says at 11:16 am, August 21st, 2009

    God willing, we will prevail in peace and freedom from fear and in true health through the purity and essence of our natural fluids.

  10. elburrito says at 11:18 am, August 21st, 2009

    Why do paranoid schizophrenics always have such nice handwriting?

  11. teebob2000 says at 11:19 am, August 21st, 2009

    It’s the spooks (the CIA, I mean) trying to undermine the presidency of the spook (Obama, I mean).

  12. bfstevie says at 11:19 am, August 21st, 2009

    Where does one get an Obama coffee mug? Does it come with coffee made from a delightful blend of Kenyan and Hawaiian beans?

  13. Jim89048 says at 11:19 am, August 21st, 2009

    I smell SEIU plant…

  14. bored with gravity says at 11:20 am, August 21st, 2009

    Dear USAmerican,

    No.

    Love,
    CIA, Blackwater Division

  15. teebob2000 says at 11:20 am, August 21st, 2009

    teebob2000: And I don’t mean to condone that kind of racist talk, either.

  16. hobospacejunkie says at 11:20 am, August 21st, 2009

    From what horrible Liz Becton-like character did this cabbie learn to write? I like to think that my handwriting does not seem to indicate that I’m eight-years-old.

  17. The Cold Sea says at 11:21 am, August 21st, 2009

    Damn, I must have left that in the back of the cab.

  18. teebob2000 says at 11:21 am, August 21st, 2009

    bfstevie: I demand the cabby produce the receipt for that mug!! How come everyone else can produce their receipts on-demand, huh???

  19. Madeline says at 11:25 am, August 21st, 2009

    I read the headline as “poutine poisonings” as was wondering if poisoning poutine would be redundant.

  20. bfstevie: Yes! And there’s even a certificate of authenticity - though Orly Taitz is having it examined for signs of tampering. If she finds out the beans were really from Columbia….hoo boy….

  21. elburrito says at 11:26 am, August 21st, 2009

    Since when has the USA stopped doing anything because it was cruel?

  22. silly cabbie, USA = CIA

  23. hockeymom says at 11:30 am, August 21st, 2009

    Madeline: poisoning our neighbors to the north? Obama will stop at NOTHING, I tell you.

  24. user-of-owls says at 11:30 am, August 21st, 2009

    I’m not sure about ‘Matt’, but I’m thinking I would have probably backed slowly out of the cab upon seeing that sign, as opposed to snapping surreptitious photos behind an obviously deranged individual…with a rear-view mirror.

  25. Uncertainty Vice-Principal says at 11:32 am, August 21st, 2009

    Wait a minute, that cup actually says “Bar Oba”. Isn’t that the place downtown that specializes in absinthe?

  26. greywindz says at 11:36 am, August 21st, 2009

    SayItWithWookies: You stole my words… ;-)

  27. Uncertainty Vice-Principal says at 11:37 am, August 21st, 2009

    Madeline: Yes I think it’s like “spoiled haggis”, or “ignorant Republican voters”. You know, redundant.

  28. Speed Ball says at 11:38 am, August 21st, 2009

    If you are an Obama nut and it is early in the morning, and you really need a cup of coffee to cut through the haze and start an exciting new day of being insane, and the only available coffee happens to come in an ‘Obama HOPE’ themed disposable cup, WHAT DO YOU DO?

  29. Humpback says at 11:39 am, August 21st, 2009

    Wouldn’t that sign be better posted on his refrigerator? I mean, how likely is it that his daily fares will just happen to be CIA operatives?

  30. facehead says at 11:40 am, August 21st, 2009

    Ok, we’ll stop.

  31. finallyhappy says at 11:46 am, August 21st, 2009

    Speed Ball: after carefully reviewing the photo for at least 4 seconds- it is not a disposable cup.
    Humpback: It’s Dc- we all work a second job for the CIA. Do you know what those Obama cups cost???

  32. Sussemilch says at 11:47 am, August 21st, 2009

    That’s not the CIA, cabbie. That’s Splenda.

  33. PrairiePossum says at 11:47 am, August 21st, 2009

    The mug contains a delightful mix of gin, anti-freeze and koolaid.

  34. Todd Mecklem says at 11:47 am, August 21st, 2009

    It says “Because it is Crue”–Mötley Crüe. Makes sense, as they’ve been poisoning the minds of impressionable youngsters for decades.

  35. widget09 says at 11:49 am, August 21st, 2009

    Oh noes, the dreaded “Illuminatti” are at it again. Is he talking about floride, then drink well water. They are trying to sedate the “sheeple” into accepting the “New World Order”. I believe that the same nuts are the ones stockpiling ammunition.

  36. GreatOldOnesParty says at 11:49 am, August 21st, 2009

    The sign is written in chollo txt l337.

    Correct tranlation of first line:
    “You! Ese! STOP the CIA”

  37. Speed Ball says at 11:50 am, August 21st, 2009

    finallyhappy: This only leads to more questions.

  38. Dear Sir,

    Really? After all these years, you dump me with a scrawl on your dashboard?
    It’s the FBI isn’t it? ISN’T IT? We saw their little wiretap in your wallet, MR. TWOTIMER. Well, fuck you too. Have a nice life.

    Yours,

    (the) CIA

  39. GreatOldOnesParty says at 11:57 am, August 21st, 2009

    Yes, I’ll admit it. Stopping people from breaking into your house to poison your food and drinks is cruel.
    It’d be much nicer if they just sent you to a government-sponsored Obamacare clinic where you would recieve an anal-poison colonoscopy from Barney Frank.

  40. rmontcal says at 11:57 am, August 21st, 2009

    I thought the end of that was “because it is crue!!!” and I thought they were suggesting Dr. Feelgood as a solution to the health care crisis.

  41. One Yield Regular says at 11:57 am, August 21st, 2009

    It’s not poison, it’s just amateurism. Those Culinary Institute of America kids are just in training, you know. From now on, eat in a restaurant that has a fully-trained professional chef.

  42. shadowMark says at 11:59 am, August 21st, 2009

    First the Y2K thing wiped out much of civilization. Then poisoned cat food from China–remember that stuff?–killed almost everyone who was left and their cats. I just know now people who write notes to the government on their dashboard are going to freak out trying to parallel park and run over the rest of us when we’re trying to cross the street to buy a fucking donut.

  43. Lascauxcaveman says at 12:00 pm, August 21st, 2009

    hobospacejunkie: I think our cabbie’s handwriting indicates not only English-as-a-second-language, but also Roman-lettering-as-a-second-alphabet.

  44. Lascauxcaveman says at 12:03 pm, August 21st, 2009

    Naw, I take it back. He’s just one of those cabbies who really doesn’t want to make small talk and the sign is a clever way to make his fares just STFU.

  45. Humpback: No, no, no. He’s asking the USA to stop the CIA from poisoning his food and drink. So he’s hoping that any U.S. Americans that get in his cab will call their congressman, unless they are D.C. residents don’t actually have a congressman.

  46. AKAM80TheWolf says at 12:07 pm, August 21st, 2009

    Not only is his mind lost, but by the looks of it, the note is covering his gps unit so he’s physically lost as well!

  47. President Beeblebrox says at 12:11 pm, August 21st, 2009

    Mahousu: Yeah, I was just about to comment that the lower-case G in that sign is frakking awesome. Reminds me of the G on the Craigslist HQ sign.

  48. Lil' Kim Jong-Il says at 12:14 pm, August 21st, 2009

    Dear USA,

    And after you take care of that CIA business, please send me the woman of my dreams — her name is Dyann the Talking Dinner Table and she shares many of my beliefs and values.

    Sincerely,
    Me

  49. Humpback says at 12:38 pm, August 21st, 2009

    One Yield Regular: Nice catch on the CIA ambiguity.

  50. When will people learn? Food is a privilege, not a right.

  51. Red Zeppelin says at 12:52 pm, August 21st, 2009

    I can has Hopey Travel Mug?

  52. finallyhappy says at 1:10 pm, August 21st, 2009

    Red Zeppelin: sure, try the nasty looking gift shops around Ford’s Theater- just make sure no one has used the mug already

  53. WickedWitch says at 1:13 pm, August 21st, 2009

    WTF?

  54. give us a bob says at 1:16 pm, August 21st, 2009

    If the request is that the CIA not do anything considered “cruel,” then I guess waterboarding is perfectly fine, right?

  55. Death Panel Wagon says at 1:33 pm, August 21st, 2009

    well it may be cruel, but it ain’t unusual, so STFU foreign cabbie dude.

    And stop watching me jack off in the back seat, it ruins the mood.

  56. Prommie says at 2:46 pm, August 21st, 2009

    Becouse, also.

  57. RobPetrified says at 10:13 pm, August 21st, 2009

    I know a paranoid rightie in Wichita KS who spells because “becouse.”
    I’m glad he lives on another planet, more or less, because he threatened to slap me.
    So that just goes to show y’uns that if you misspell that word, you’re crazier than a big ‘ol bag of batshit, and everybody can see it.

  58. desertwind says at 10:18 pm, August 21st, 2009

    That looks like foreign script to me.

  59. What a mook! Can’t even spell gruel.

  60. The cabbie is on to something. I can’t stand it when the Starbucks, I mean the CIA poisons my venti coffee light frappuchio

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