Clever D.C. Intern Uses SmarTrip Card As Fake I.D., Is Bludgeoned To Death By The Management
"I'm only 19 BUT as you can clearly see from my big red badge, I have an internship yanking the goose hairs off Congressman Blowhard's back -- you know, THE Congressman Blowhard? -- So, my friends and I would like a pitcher of Poland Spring Vodka but you don't need to bring extra glasses, a few straws will be fine. Wait, do you have Crazy Straws? YOU DO?!" [ Spotted: DC Interns ]
Welcome to the District of Columbia, where HIV runs free like the Potomac River, all the way to Chesapeake Bay! And a special shout-out to CVS for putting all the condoms under lock and key, like a Good Neighbor would. Of course, this policy isn't nearly as compassionate as the 9-month wait before CVS will sell you Plan B. [ DCist ]
It's disgusting to see how Facebook has encouraged countless acts of sexual harassment, In Real Life. [ Holla Back DC ]
Why don't the young people of Montgomery County want to learn the noble trades of blacksmithery and fishmongering? [ Washington Examiner ]
The Arlington Chamber of Commerce hired Mobb Deep to write a rap about life on the streets. Our favorite couplet: "No doubt, watchin' my back and proceed with caution / Five-oh lurkin', no time to get lost in -- Whole Foods." [ DCist ]
Remember to receive racist e-mails from your school board president this weekend! That, and more. [ Paul Slansky/TIME ]