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GATHER YE ROUND

PUBLIC EXECUTION: We warned “Miller” never to show his link-whoring fraud face around here again, but he did anyway, and now he is banned permanently & forever. Boo Miller! Miller’s the worst!


3:39 PM on Tue June 9 2009
By Jim Newell
2870 Views

  1. Udargo says at 3:44 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Am I really making the first comment, or is this some sort of trap?

  2. JimNewell says at 3:46 pm, June 9th, 2009

    There is no trap. Feel free to comment, kiddies! Tell your stories about Miller.

  3. InsidiousTuna says at 3:46 pm, June 9th, 2009
  4. CivicHoliday says at 3:47 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Don’t whore links, whore minks. (for their beautiful beautiful coats)

  5. mattbolt says at 3:47 pm, June 9th, 2009

    His rotting body shall remain hanged from the gallows in the Wonkette town square for a week, as both a reminder and a warning to the townspeople, until finally he is buried, where, per his request, the only memorial on his tombstone will be a link to his Blogspot account.

  6. queeraselvis v 2.0 says at 3:48 pm, June 9th, 2009

    I have my peck of deliciously teeming, overripe tomatoes just aching to be hurled. To the gallows!

  7. orange says at 3:48 pm, June 9th, 2009

    At least he wasn’t a blacksmith.

  8. tunamelt says at 3:49 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Can we dance on the flaming ashes of his body?

  9. Noodle Salad says at 3:49 pm, June 9th, 2009

    My only regret is that I have but one sockpuppet to give for my geocities page.

  10. BlueStateLibtard says at 3:51 pm, June 9th, 2009

    InsidiousTuna: You’re link’s dead. All’s I get is: “Did You Mean: My Shitty Blog Truck Nutz Also”

  11. Texan Bulldoggette says at 3:52 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Sorry, but he still wasn’t 1/100th as annoying as she-who-shall-not-be named. But, yeah, the link whoring was annoying. Imagine my surprise to learn that Wonkette has SOME standards!

  12. Cape Clod says at 3:52 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Thank goodness you got rid of that whoring, insidious slut.
    Who are we talking about again?
    Kill him!

  13. Godless Liberal says at 3:53 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Really now, would it have been that much better for him to have emailed the tips line every time he made a comment?

  14. 51dimes says at 3:53 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Can we do that over? I hadn’t gotten the rotten tomatoes ready yet.

  15. Boojum says at 3:54 pm, June 9th, 2009

    BlueStateLibtard: Um, stoopid dude. Yeah, you. Not so much with the smarts, huh?

  16. Naked Bunny with a Whip says at 3:56 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Does this mean I can now link to my Flickr page, so everyone can see more pictures of my ass? Please? No? Goddamn it. Jim just wants everyone’s eyes on his ass.

    Mmm.

    What were we talking about again?

  17. bologna_wallet says at 3:56 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Hilarious! More blogs need public executions.

  18. Boojum says at 3:56 pm, June 9th, 2009

    So, now that Milfer is gone, can we have more ass fucking, please? For Jesus?

  19. Judas Peckerwood says at 3:56 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Burning? Stoning?

  20. freakishlystrong says at 3:57 pm, June 9th, 2009

    InsidiousTuna: Please, let’s all chip in and buy this url we can rant and cuss and talk about buttsecks and..oh, wait, we do that here. Carry on.

  21. WickedWitch says at 3:57 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Jim Newell: Excellent. I’ll be right over with my whip.

  22. rereridiculous says at 3:58 pm, June 9th, 2009

    I’ve been kinda desensitized over the past 8 years. Can we take him to Gitmo instead when it’s free?

  23. memzilla says at 4:00 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Be sure to autoclave the banhammer after every use. Link whores always have STDs.

  24. Lord Growing says at 4:01 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Ahh. Haven’t felt this good since I saw Captain Wirz’s sorry Swiss ass a-swingin’ from the gallis pole.

  25. user-of-owls says at 4:03 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Texan Bulldoggette: Amen, sister. I don’t think Mssr. Newell hanged her, though. Pretty sure he went with the more appropriate “shot from a helicopter” method.

  26. user-of-owls says at 4:07 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Hey, here’s an idea. Next time someone is scheduled for execution, could we have a Nuremberg-style thread/trial (no testimony from the defendant permitted) where everyone could recount the crimes committed by the reprobate in question? Kind of like a Truth and Annihilation Committee. Imagine the hijinks!

  27. rev_matt_y says at 4:11 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Unrelated, but I thought I should mention that on Wait Wait this weekend they noted that the new GM strategy for “Real American Cars” was to buy a bunch of used late model Hondas and outfit them with TruckNutz.

  28. norbizness says at 4:18 pm, June 9th, 2009

    One edict enforced, 1294 to go.

  29. MathewBrooks says at 4:18 pm, June 9th, 2009

    rev_matt_y: Unrelated comments are also grounds for EXECUTION! Quickly, Self-immolate before they DEFENESTRATE you!

  30. Double Scorpion says at 4:19 pm, June 9th, 2009

    We would have all such commenters so cut off: and we give express charge, that in our marches through the intartubes, there be no links whored from the posts, no pageviews stolen but earned, none of the Editors upbraided or abused in wordy disdainful comments. For when snarky and pompous play for a website, the funnier gamester is the soonest winner of the day.

  31. I find myself on the horns of a dilemma. I am fundamentally opposed to the death penalty, but, you know, that guy had it coming.

  32. Lascauxcaveman says at 4:23 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Naked Bunny with a Whip: I think as long as your ass brings the funny, or is somewhat related to the post on which you’re planning to link the pictures of said ass (”This is my ass which was penetrated by a Bohener last night” etc.), the editors will take a condoning view of said ass.

  33. Lionel Hutz Esq. says at 4:31 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Naked Bunny with a Whip: I believe we were talking about your ass and pictures of your ass…., please go on.

  34. Cape Clod says at 4:33 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Min: I am against the death penalty too, but in this case hanging is too good for him. I say cut off his head and pee down his neck.

  35. jon c says at 4:34 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Somewhere, Shirley Jackson is smiling.

  36. Sunfire says at 4:36 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Why I was just blogging about public bannings on the internet! Here, let me link to it for you…

  37. Mad Farmer Manifest says at 4:55 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Judas Peckerwood: I’m up for some celebratory stoning. But not with rocks.

  38. bhosp says at 4:56 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Do we take nominations for the Comment of the Day thing? Can I nominate this ?

  39. Inadequate Blackmail says at 4:59 pm, June 9th, 2009

    So… was he link whoring again? Or did we just hang him for past crimes?

  40. WIDTAP says at 5:08 pm, June 9th, 2009

    I Jim and Ken were supposed to be afraid to ban the blog whores, because then the blog whores would be in here in America, or something.

  41. Pat Pending says at 5:08 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Personally, I love a nice drawing and quartering, preceded by a spin or two on the catherine wheel. I’m old-fashioned like that.

  42. WIDTAP says at 5:08 pm, June 9th, 2009

    I thought Jim and Ken….

  43. RoscoePColtraine says at 5:15 pm, June 9th, 2009

    a la “Augustus Gloop Goes Up The Pipe”

  44. S.Luggo says at 5:19 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Gallows? Looks like a man-date auction wit’ only the mens bidding. Oh, yeah. Newell.

  45. BlueStateLibtard says at 5:19 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Boojum: Dude, check on your own limited smarts if you think I was being serious with you.

  46. Mr Blifil says at 5:28 pm, June 9th, 2009

    I was hoping for something along the lines of that movie The Crays.

  47. Boojum says at 5:44 pm, June 9th, 2009

    BlueStateLibtard: Dude, wha? Smarts? Elite arugula something? BLOG WHORE! KILL! YAY!!!

  48. Joshua Norton says at 5:48 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Hmm. I was going in a whole different direction with what I thought link whoring was.

  49. bitchincamaro says at 5:53 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Can I have his avatar?

  50. Red Zeppelin says at 6:34 pm, June 9th, 2009

    How many whore diamonds does he get? Can I have them now that he’s dead?

  51. nestor says at 6:46 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Can’t wait for that Pumpernickel bitch to come back.

  52. snowg00n says at 7:34 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Red Zeppelin: if you want to sift through his smoldering ashes for the whore diamonds, you got dibs.

  53. WIDTAP: We’ve got to fight them over there so we can fight them over here. Or something.

  54. Deepthroat says at 8:35 pm, June 9th, 2009

    I just wanted to say that I’m sorry.

  55. proudgrampa says at 10:02 pm, June 9th, 2009

    WTF?

  56. Darehead says at 10:49 pm, June 9th, 2009

    We could enjoy his suffering longer if you put him in the pillory. Millory?

  57. blogslut says at 10:56 pm, June 9th, 2009

    InsidiousTuna: I shall be giggling out loud, all night, thanks to you.

  58. agentstinky says at 11:38 pm, June 9th, 2009

    Wow I sure am glad that link-whoring sonofabitch is finally gone!

    …

    http://thesebastards.blogspot.com

  59. joeybrill says at 12:51 am, June 10th, 2009

    Is he dead yet? You could kill him again just to be safe, you know.

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